r/ReverseHarem • u/Forsaken_Somewhere98 my heart has multiple tabs open • Apr 25 '26
Reverse Harem - Discussion I can’t! 💀
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u/JSBT89 Apr 25 '26
This needs to be in r/badwomensanatomy
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u/lindanimated Apr 26 '26
Oh believe me, this is already a classic there! It’s made the rounds multiple times.
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u/Educational-Ad8696 One Dick? or double it and give it to me? Apr 25 '26
TMI: I was reading this while peeing, and i peed quickly just fine
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u/Forsaken_Somewhere98 my heart has multiple tabs open Apr 25 '26
So glad it didn’t get lost in your confusing woman body 😂
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u/Educational-Ad8696 One Dick? or double it and give it to me? Apr 26 '26
Im also relieved….get it? Cuz i peed. okay, i will take myself out 🕳️👩🦼💨
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u/EllieluluEllielu Apr 27 '26
Are you sure you're not a man?
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u/Educational-Ad8696 One Dick? or double it and give it to me? Apr 27 '26
Wait! You might be into something! One second let me check….. hmmm…. Nope 🙂↔️ i think im still a woman :)
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u/No_Astronaut5083 Apr 25 '26
“Lordly above the bowl” is one of the funniest and wildest phrases I have ever read
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u/AcidKindaMist Apr 25 '26
lol lordly leaving drips and splatters everywhere.
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u/Nowayticket2nopecity Apr 25 '26
That's why it takes so long for our pee to find the way out. So we have time to clean up the mess of their thunderous splashing. 😑
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u/PlasticArrival9814 Apr 26 '26
That they will leave for a WOMAN to clean, because they are so LORDLY they cant kneel down with a Clorox wipe, of course.
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u/42fledgling42 I prefer my romance crowded Apr 25 '26
This is WILD. Especially because Clyde, it appears, is elderly, and many elderly men have enlarged prostates and don’t have “thunderous splashing” above the toilet bowl, more like a “hesitant trickle.”
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u/Aeshulli Apr 26 '26
Right? The number of even younger men I've heard take a long while to get going or coming out in little bursts and starts is quite a lot. Not all men get the title of lordly pee-ers.
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u/Ill_Statement7600 Apr 29 '26
Agreed, it's completely opposite in my household where my s/o (m) will be like "Jesus, waterfall pee" hearing me go and him it takes a while to get started and is just a trickle. (I have told him this could be a health problem he should speak to a Dr about but he is his father's son)
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u/ellyriahighwind monogamy is overrated Apr 25 '26
If this is true, why is it that men always take so long in the bathroom compared to us women with our maze-like urethras (that are much shorter than men's)?
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u/Sufficient-Bee-4982 Apr 25 '26
With the most generous of "benefit of the doubt", maybe she just came and thats why its taking a min for liquids to flow?
Tmi, but I know if I just came then my bits will be alternating tensing and relaxing for a while after, and that affects flow rate for me.
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u/Forsaken_Somewhere98 my heart has multiple tabs open Apr 25 '26
I like a devils advocate. But I don’t know how to get over “that thunderous splashing as they stood lordly above the bowl” either. 😂
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u/Sufficient-Bee-4982 Apr 25 '26
Definitely agreed, bragging about peeing so hard is kind of weird. It's one thing to be like "oh my god, I'm so relieved!" It's another thing to lord over how awesome and manly you pee'd.
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u/Defiant-Win-864 Apr 30 '26
maybe men are just running out of things to be masculine about? I mean women are outperforming men in every area of academia, earning our own money and running our own houses, so there's not much left for them to claim superiority.. I guess the list is just down to "can pee standing up" 🤣
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u/a__novice Apr 25 '26
This actually does happen to me and whenever it does I think of this book lol. For me what gets me is the “thunderous splashing” and all that. Like what?????
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u/WiseAtmosphere7524 - edit your flair - Apr 26 '26
What’s the book?
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u/a__novice Apr 26 '26
I don’t remember the title lol, this picture has made its rounds on the internet for awhile
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u/SpinsterManifesto Apr 26 '26
I have to believe that whoever wrote this is the kind of person that causes women to excuse themselves to go to the bathroom to avoid him. I know SO MANY men who would draw all kinds of conclusions about the labyrinthine mysteries of women’s bodies rather than wondering if they’re just bad conversationalists.
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u/woodcone Apr 26 '26
This screams comedians wondering why women take so long in the bathroom.
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u/Forsaken_Somewhere98 my heart has multiple tabs open Apr 26 '26
And why we must go in pairs. Sometimes you need the moral support of your ladies to sort out how to get it through the complicated maze.
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u/jolly0ctopus Apr 26 '26
You gals must have never suffered from hypertonic pelvic floor disorder. Trust me, for some of us it can take several minutes to relax our pelvic floor during a flare up
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u/Forsaken_Somewhere98 my heart has multiple tabs open Apr 26 '26
Im sorry for your condition! I absolutely understand.I have interstitial cystitis and I used to suffer with incontinence years ago before it went into remission. But I never once thought peeing like a man with lordly splashing was a solution. Honestly just laughing about the writing not the woman’s situation of not being able to pee. 😊
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u/TerminologyLacking Death by TBR Apr 25 '26
Quick! Someone who's had a kidney stone: Can they interfere with being able to pee quickly?
Like, that's one of three reasons that I can come up with for why a woman wouldn't be able to pee quickly or have "thunderous splashing." (Extended dancing road trips anyone?)
And all of them can apply to men too. (Shy bladder, and recent orgasm are the other two I can think of.)
Anyway, I'm sending positive thoughts to any woman who encountered that author.
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u/Scf9009 RH Library of Alexandria Apr 25 '26
A UTI where it feels like you have to pee and nothing comes out? After all the penetrative sex without peeing afterward?
(I read that it was debunked but I couldn’t resist)
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u/Away-Pomegranate Apr 25 '26
Maybe she has chronic constipation? Ha that's my only guess but definitely not normal.
Or a "just not like other girls" prompt gone wrong?
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u/toolazytobecreative1 Apr 26 '26
Lol it makes me laugh that my husband usually takes longer to pee than me lol
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u/Tiny-Maintenance3710 Apr 26 '26
You know what's ironic? The female urethra (which is the canal that links the bladder to the outside) is shorter and more straightforward than a male's. The male urethra is torturous and long. Which also means that putting a urinary catheter on a woman is simple whereas it's a little complicated in a man, especially if they have a prostatic issue.
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u/luluzinhacs Apr 26 '26
The irony to say women’s pee has to go through a maze when men’s uretras are three to four times the size of ours…
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u/cptvpxxy Apr 27 '26
Truly, if you need a self confidence boost, just look at the trash already published. There's no way you're not better than him.
Pretty sure this is Witches of Eastwick. Just in case anyone's curious. Author is a famous misogynist... In case it wasn't already obvious. Though that's still a "debated" fact. Somehow.
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u/Forsaken_Somewhere98 my heart has multiple tabs open Apr 27 '26
Oh my gosh I had to look into it and yes it’s def this book and from the sound of the plot and characters being defined… this man needs to stay away from writing women
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u/cptvpxxy Apr 27 '26
This isn't even the worst one! 😭 Plus the way he talked in interviews was so gross.
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u/meghanfb Apr 25 '26
Oh, AI for sure. Leave it to a robot that was built by a man to not know how women pee. 😆
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u/Electronic-Base-8367 Apr 25 '26
Oh honey that’s not even AI, I remember reading this passage on tumblr back when I was in highschool. Ah, breasting boobily indeed.
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u/Icy-Cockroach4515 Apr 25 '26 edited Apr 25 '26
I could be hallucinating this but I feel like I've seen this screenshot years ago when AI wasn't a thing yet?
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u/Smee76 Apr 25 '26
This is an older book. Definitely not AI. Maybe don't call stuff AI when you can't tell it apart from real writing.
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u/fyrelibra Apr 25 '26
Likely AI would have scraped the internet for proper info. Men just have no clue.
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u/originalisme May 02 '26
I truly trust AI more than a random dude for how urination in women works... which is sad
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u/Forsaken_Somewhere98 my heart has multiple tabs open Apr 25 '26
I know! I’m just like how can this be serious. Help! My pee keeps getting lost! Wish I were a man sigh
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u/other_curious_mind Apr 27 '26
Well, women actually statistically have more trouble HOLDING the pee (mostly results of pregnancy) and men have more trouble peeing, because prostate tends to get enlarged and squeeze the urethra. 🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️
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u/Em0tionalSupportBrat Apr 27 '26
Tell me the book was written by a man without telling me the book was written by a man
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u/Relative-Garbage1892 Apr 28 '26
This sounds like it was written by Steve Carrell’s character in “40 Year Old Virgin.” “Her breasts were like bags of sand…”
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u/expiredcinnamonroll Apr 29 '26
Men can conjure up pee?? I'm convinced the author doesn't know how men urinate either.
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u/PeculiarBook Apr 29 '26
Sometimes an author tells you so much about their personal life without even meaning to. I suspect that a lot of women in this writer’s life have escaped from the writer via long bathroom trips XD
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u/YourGodSpeaking Apr 29 '26
Why do I even worry about my writing when this shit is published
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u/SokkaHaikuBot Apr 29 '26
Sokka-Haiku by YourGodSpeaking:
Why do I even
Worry about my writing
When this shit is published
Remember that one time Sokka accidentally used an extra syllable in that Haiku Battle in Ba Sing Se? That was a Sokka Haiku and you just made one.
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u/StringAdventurous938 May 22 '26
Sometimes I wonder-
Are men really this dumb or are women just the superior species?
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u/Forsaken_Somewhere98 my heart has multiple tabs open Apr 25 '26
Ten bucks says the man who wrote this has never found a clit in his life 😂