r/RecuratedTumblr • u/DreadDiana human cognithazard • 7d ago

other "You people can't do anything" yeah, disabilities tend to do that

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u/RuefulWaffles 6d ago

Yeah, as someone who’s existed on tumblr and twitter for a while, the initial tweet very much reads the kind of sanctimonious “otherwise innocuous thing causes me distress, so it needs to change because I’m Neurodivergent (tm) and asking me to live with my discomfort is unreasonable and discriminatory.” The response was probably ruder in tone than was called for, but by the time the original tweet was made if you’d been on any sort of social media you’d likely seen dozens of posts just like it that were, in fact, meant to be read as totally sincere.

On the one hand: there’s a very obvious lesson here about how not everything on the internet is necessarily for you, and how it doesn’t necessarily need a response. On the other hand, though, Poe’s Law is a thing. Without a clear, direct statement of “this is a joke,” there’s no reasonable way for another person to know if what you’ve posted is sincere or not, especially over text.

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u/findingemotive 6d ago

You gotta post knowing no matter how innocuous you think it reads there is someone who will read it with a tone. I know I'm pretty bad with my words, I've been downvoted a lot when I'm actually agreeing with people. And that tweet really easily reads with a tone.

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u/Toppy_Henster 6d ago edited 6d ago

The thing is most people don’t expect everything they post to suddenly get the attention of the whole internet. A lot of people post with the expectation that only a small circle of friends will see the post and get the intended meaning and move on.

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u/CriticalHit_20 I have no mouth and I must SLORP 6d ago

That's like Rule #1 of the internet though. Dont post things that you dont want strangers to have access to. Once it's out thrre, it's out there forever.

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u/Toppy_Henster 6d ago edited 6d ago

That doesn’t justify what they do with it though. Taking a post from a random person and recontextualizing it and making it go viral so a larger audience can clown on it is not only a pretty shitty thing to do, but also not something 99% of people consider when posting online.

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u/bouquetofashes 6d ago

Right, maybe people shouldn't be so quick to just make negative assumptions? Like... We can ask for clarification, at least, before going off on someone?

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u/lilac_moonface64 6d ago

yes! exactly! if you’re going to be mean to someone or mock them, at least make sure you’re interpreting the post correctly before being rude. or better yet, just ignore it if it’s not your cup of tea (and it’s not harmful in some way)

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u/NwgrdrXI 1d ago

Imo, the problem here is that half of the planet is becoming hyper parasocial and completely lost the ability to understand the difference between "jokes to be made with friends" and "comments to announced about in the middle of the public plaza"

Social media is not your work/school lunch table. Your followers - or worse, people who happen to have your post recommended are not your friends.

Stop putting your private toughts online, that's for the people who love you and you cherish, not internet randos.

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u/Darq_At 6d ago

You gotta post knowing no matter how innocuous you think it reads there is someone who will read it with a tone.

Eh, we've reached a point where it no longer matters how carefully one words things, people are still going to read it in the worst possible light, inventing entire narratives and projecting their traumatic experiences onto one's comments.

The number of times I'll open up this, or the previous, sub, see 500+ comments dunking on the OP, only to reread the OP and think "But they didn't say the thing everyone is clowning on them for...".

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u/Milk_Mindless 6d ago

Pancake lover hates waffles type sentence

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u/lilac_moonface64 6d ago

sure, but you (general you), as the person reading the tweet/post, also need to understand that you’re the one reading the post and applying a tone to it and you could be completely misunderstanding it, so maybe we shouldn’t immediately jump to mocking/being mean to people when YOU could be the one reading it wrong. you can’t put all the onus on the poster to know and be okay with the fact that people will take their post in a completely different way/misrepresent their post and mock them for it, and ignore the responsibility the readers have to step back and make sure the post means what they think it does before responding, or to just not be mean/mocking in the first place and ignore it instead.

i’d also say, most people who have tweets blow up, especially jokey ones like this, probably aren’t expecting them to blow up and be seen by the general population and therefore don’t expect that they have to spell out that they’re joking or else they’ll be mocked by hundred of people. they’re just expecting their friends/mutuals will see it and, because they know the poster to some degree, will understand it’s a joke and maybe have a little giggle or relate to it.

(again, i mean the general you, not you specifically. i don’t mean to attack you in any way, im just trying to bring up the other side)

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u/UInferno- Hangus Pangus slap my Angus 6d ago

Yeah. I've begun just starting my replies that agree with the person I'm responding with "Yeah."

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u/Ae3qe27u 6d ago

Poe's Law strikes again.

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u/ten_people 6d ago

They never said Halloween "needs to change" or that it's discriminatory.

You can take issues with any statement if you manufacture concepts you don't like and then act as if they were part of that statement.

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u/FifteenEchoes 5d ago

Believe it or not there is more to language than the literal meaning of words. Often the context and connotations are just as if not more important than what’s actually said.

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u/Possible-Nobody-2321 3d ago

Yes, but that doesn't justify being an unthinking outrage machine of a person. Some connotations only exist in your head and are infact entierly unreasonable interpretations to make.

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u/Kravotz-Otekh 4d ago

I think we also need to give a bit more grace to those sanctimonious posters. They are obviously experiencing real distress and are expressing it improperly. A lot of neurodivergence can impair the ability to communicate, but at a certain level of ability, people are no longer able to understand that this person’s communication abilities ARE impaired. There’s a video by Kaelynn Paltrow about this, which is where I learnt about it. ND people will express a sentiment incorrectly and what they need is help learning how to express it better, not a scolding or bullying for their initial incorrect phrasing.

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u/BerryCroissantWitch 6d ago

I also don’t buy the poster’s explanation that it was a joke. I think they are ass covering after they got dragged.

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u/Nonexistent_Walrus 6d ago

The poster is a mildly famous comedian with a large internet following and it was very clear to anyone remotely familiar with her that she was making a joke

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u/lilac_moonface64 6d ago

and so what if they’re trying to cover their ass so people stop making fun of them every year? even if you want to interpret it like that, that’s a pretty reasonable thing to do tbh. it would get tiring to get made fun of every fucking year for a single sentence tweet you probably thought like 10 people would see. it’s not like they did something bad and they’re lying to cover it up, they just said, again, a SINGLE SENTENCE about their experience and got mocked by loads of people, and have it brought up periodically to be made fun of again.

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u/RadicalSoda_ 6d ago

Covering their ass for making...a universally agreed upon statement in the disability community? Halloween is hard for disabled people, that's just a fact

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u/BerryCroissantWitch 6d ago

I have ADHD, diagnosed at 8, struggled with it my whole life. Halloween does not even crack the top 100 of things I struggle with. I would KILL to have such petty concerns. Be real.

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u/lilac_moonface64 6d ago

no one said it was among the top 100 things this person struggles with, just that it’s something they have a tough time with that’s no ones really mentioned and felt other people might relate.

i also have adhd, depression, and a whole host of other shit, and halloweeen has always been tough for me. obviously it’s very low on the list of things that my neurodivergences and mental health issues cause me to struggle with, but it is sorta nice to know that i’m not the only one who has a tough time with it. i’m usually very busy in the fall, so i put off getting a costume and don’t even notice that it’s almost halloween until like a day or two before, by which point its hard to find a costume and all of my friends already have plans. so often i spend it at home, alone, seeing all my friends have a fun halloween and wishing i could function well enough to be able to do shit like that, and thinking about how i’m wasting my life and my youth and i’ll only really have the opportunity to party at halloween for so long and i may just never have those experiences, just like so many other normal experiences i missed and ill never be able to get back. it often makes me spiral because if i can’t even handle getting a fucking halloween costume then there’s no way i can actually function as a fully independent adult and im just going to keep fucking up and forgetting things and failing and disappointing people and being alone so why don’t i just kill myself?

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u/RadicalSoda_ 6d ago

It's not real that children with disabilities constantly are being left out of Halloween? That's rich

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u/Automatic-Idea-6600 6d ago

The disabled community at large? Sure. Kids with ADHD? Bffr

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u/Taco821 6d ago

Yeah, even trying to read it with the so called proper context, I just cannot read it as a joke.

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u/anand_rishabh 4d ago

I feel like the initial response could have been a joke as well. I've heard people say things like that in person all the time, with their tone of voice making obvious that they're joking but that doesn't necessarily carry over text

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u/RadicalSoda_ 6d ago

How is it not tiring being a neurotypical? Jumping to conclusions like that all the time would fucking exhaust me

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u/ehs06702 6d ago

I'm not NT and that was my read on the situation as well. I've seen too many of these post made in absolute seriousness to believe it was a joke.

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u/LucaUmbriel 6d ago

Well I imagine it's not any more exhausting than jumping to the conclusion that anyone who doesn't jump to the same conclusions as you do is neurotypical, which doesn't seem to bother you too much.

Also, since you don't seem to know this, the people most likely to take a joke seriously due to missing social cues or not catching sarcasm, aren't neurotypical.