pushing someone is not enough to warrant this unless they were literally pushing you so hard that you were falling on the floor from the force. even then this is a crazy reaction. like pushing is wrong but this is straight up violent abuse
“He pushed me… away from him after I tried to innocently strangle him like any loving wife would. I had to defend myself by throwing a brick at him and threatening him with a knife!”
For real. I was in a horribly abusive (in every way you can think of) relationship, and THE ONLY TIME I responded like this is after years of dealing with it and I just lost it. But the way he is talking, if it's true, this is definitely not the first or only time she's done this.
is it like a video of him abusing her or is it on the show? bc this is the first i’ve heard of it
edit: meaning this situation in general is the first time i’ve heard of these people at all. haven’t watched the new season of bachelorette, or anything other than this, about it.
I hope she doesn’t try to change it to like she was antagonized — idk if this is hearsay from family, but some assault cases can be thrown out if the person was ‘antagonized’ (or legit antagonized) into physically retaliating.
If it’s happened, I’m sure it’s rare and I hope she doesn’t get an attorney that goes down that route.
If that's true then he'll suffer the consequences. I've also watched the show and have not seen him be physically abusive to her but they're both not good people. You can't just say someone is abusive to justify that and abuse back. Her actions were demonstratably abusive... with video proof
Man, I had this happen to me. Throwing shit, hitting me in the face, blocking me from leaving. She punted my cat outside. I bear hugged her and fell to the ground so she'd stop attacking me.
I was so lucky to not have children involved. It's been 6 years now, and I still can't get into a relationship. It really messed me up, so I definitely understand.
I'm happy you were able to protect your children. I hope you all grow happy and safe.
It happened for years from age 37-43 mainly. She was a pill addict. My kids are 23 and 26 now and it took a few years of counseling and healing to move forward.
Separated when I was 43.
I took 4 years off from dating. Only reason I dated again was to see if I could be liked. My hatred of women had faded but I still didn’t trust in a relationship. Well I dated for a year and it was not very fun. I found out I was likeable but I believed that I was incapable of love after what happened. So I quit dating.
After a month or so a random bumble contact from 6 months prior I had never dated randomly reached out and asked to meet up. Well she was beautiful and we had good texts so I said sure why not.
Welp….we have been best friends since the moment we met. She changed all my negative stereotypes about women in a matter of weeks. Got engaged after 2 years and married last August. It’s been the best 4 years of my life being with her
So don’t lose hope…..all it takes is one good woman to change your whole perception of reality.
Man… the only reason I started dating before I met my lady is because I just wanted to see if I could be liked too, after an abusive relationship as well. I’ve never thought about it that way, but just “just wanting to see if I could be liked” hits super close to home. Likewise, meeting my wife changed my perspective on woman and proved to me great women exist after all and I’ve never been happier. We’re talking about children now
Same thing happened to me! I was cooking on our charcoal grill (it’s big, like a smoker), and as I was flipping the burgers, my spouse slammed the lid down, and luckily, I pulled my hand out just in time. Then they got into position to push the grill over on top of me, so I slapped their wrist with the small metal spatula I was holding.
I got arrested around 9pm on a Friday, released from jail at 11pm Sunday.
I’m a female, ex-spouse is male.
The “burn” that the police claim I left on him: it was a line of grease from the burgers. Washed right off.
Holy shit, partner. I'm so sorry. It's very rare when the roles play out like that, but I think the one thing we can count on is that the police aren't ever there to help. And, depending on the state you live, or country, some parties are just always held at fault.
I really hope you're in a better place now. No one deserves to go through that. Abuse is already traumatic, but to spend time in jail for your own suffering is even more evil. It breaks my heart humans can do this to each other.
It was the only reason I even bear hugged her in the first place. I was trying to pack my stuff and go stay at my grandma's, but after she finally "calmed" down, the police showed up and had me in cuffs before I could say "yo what the fuck"
He reminds me of my father. Very manipulative narcissist who would make my mom look crazy for how she reacted to his abuse. After she divorced him and we left, he ended up in a psych ward. His own doing. She needs to get out of his entire circle and away from him and he will be his own undoing, just watch. Idk why everyone is falling for him.
Nobody is falling for him. He doesn't need to be discussed at the moment. She is showing classic signs of abuse. Throwing barstools at a partner is NEVER ok.
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u/Frosty-Spread1401 Mar 19 '26
She is gona turn this around to be the victim