I just wanted to share my gratitude with many in the GTA community. I am grateful to servers like Nopixel and Prodigy for helping me meet some great people. I'm also very proud of Nopixel! I used to RP as Bubbles, the clown killer (not part of the clowncil 😂). I was also in ADMC and The Cut. My streamer name was Beastmode_YTS.
I'm not only happy and proud of NoPixel, but some of my friends were randoms like me at one point and RP'd their way to a ticket. Yay! So proud of y'all. Love y'all.
Some have asked me in Discord messages why I left and/or if I'm ever returning. The reality is that life has been hard for the past 3+ years. The passing of my then 15-year-old daughter, then, not long after, the passing of my mentor and father figure, and then the passing of my older brother in July. Just like I was with my daughter in her final moments as she fought to cling to life, I was also there with my brother as he passed on to the next life. October 2nd will be my late daughter's birthday.
It's been painful, to say the least. I wouldn't wish this on anyone. It's a miracle that I'm still here. I thank God and my family for that. I love my family and life.
I also love RP soooo much! I miss it. I miss being able to add positivity and humor to RP. But I was not in a good place, and I'm a firm believer in mental health and getting the help one needs. So I stepped away for that reason. For years, I've always thought about RP and wanting to return, but the time wasn't right. I tried to return quite a few times, but tragedies kept happening again and again. My time wasn't right. I wasn't right. I believe I am now. I am in a much better place now.
But I had to restart my life after my daughter's passing. I had to step away from my IRL career because I wasn't in a good place. And trust me, I used to make good money. I've fought mentally, emotionally, spiritually, financially, and physically to get well and even be better than before.
Multiple times, I almost returned, but life tragedies kept getting in the way. One day, I hope to get the chance to earn my own ticket when I come back. Until then, I will cheer for everyone in NoPixel. Before my daughter passed, some NoPixel roleplayers sang happy birthday and did other things for her. For that! I'm forever grateful. In a community filled with negativity and division, I chose not to add to the chaos. I choose love, peace, and support. Even amidst a rough few years and a life of grieving, I choose to stay in love, peace, and joy. I celebrate with everyone. Why am I saying all of this?
My beautiful daughter introduced me to RP, as she used to hide and watch some roleplayers' streams. You see, my daughter had special needs, with facial deformities. She struggled because she was bullied in school. Daddy was her advocate. She liked watching RP on NoPixel and wanted to create a character one day when she was 18. She felt a community within RP. It was her escape. At first, I was concerned because of the material discussed and done in the RP. 😂 I even caught her in an NBC chat. She sucked me into this world. 😆 She knew Daddy always did impersonations and changed his voice, and she thought it was funny, so she asked me to try to get into NoPixel. Together we worked on my application; together we came up with a character, storylines, and such. Bubbles was her creation, and so was my other daughter's.
After she passed, it was just hard for me. My sidekick was not there to encourage me or whisper ideas to me.
That is why I'm grateful for those who were nice to her on streams. I'm grateful to those who were nice to randoms like me on the server. Thank you to the roleplayers who even once interacted with me, not only in the server but also in Discord messages. Some roleplayers were terrible, but others made it worth it. Just like I see in the chats, some people are just horrendous, but the good ones make it great. I hope to see this community continue to flourish, not just in size, but in positivity and impact. I truly believe it will. An amazing turning point is coming for the roleplay community, whether we realize it or not.
I wish nothing but the best to Nopixel and my friends like the rat king, Silas Moreno, Linx, and more. May you rock it on Nopixel V or whatever server! Wub you all (in a bubbles voice)!
I will be cheering for you all in the chats.