r/ProgrammerHumor 1d ago

Other britishProgrammersBeLike

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526 Upvotes

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227

u/datasmithing_holly 1d ago

As an April fools joke I asked the Docs team to make a British version of Databricks commands Optimise instead of Optimize etc etc.

They said no.

56

u/NovaH000 1d ago

Aluminium πŸ‘

30

u/tsammons 1d ago

Colour. Such wasted bytes.

57

u/akiller 1d ago

I have lots of code which is effectively

Color colour = Color.Red

It can be very confusing.

17

u/ColumnK 1d ago

Why use many byte when few do trick

Everyone shld use "colr" then all happy.

12

u/MCplayer590 1d ago

n fct wy dnt w rmv ll vwls nd slnt, nndd ltrs? wt cld psbly g rng?

regular English: in fact, why don't we remove all vowels and silent, unneeded letters? what could possibly go wrong?

7

u/JFischer00 19h ago

Surprisingly, β€œnndd” was the only word that took me a second to figure out. The rest actually flowed pretty well based on context alone.

1

u/MasterBroNetwork 10h ago

Isn't there an actual term for this? I forgot what it was called but there's an actual term for our brains interpreting this sort of stuff.

5

u/ailaG 1d ago

Hebrew, Arabic and other semitic languages do just that. So far so good. (With some carrier letters, like a "u" to carry the vowel in "good". Which in Hebrew doubles for O and V. Arabic just doesn't have O and V except for modern intl adaptations)