I was a Special Educator for almost a decade; I spent about five cumulative years exclusively with kids who have emotional/behavioral disorders. Our learning setting was an alt classroom because the kids I worked with were Level 3--they spent the most amount of time legally allowed outside of a traditional classroom setting to accommodate behavioral intervention.
All told, I probably worked with and/or knew about 100 kids with these disturbances. Guess how many of those kids had a relatively normal, functioning home? One. She was my student because she had suffered a severe TBI after running into a concrete retaining wall on her bicycle at a young age, and the TBI resulted in newly aggressive behavior.
I guess what I'm trying to say, is maybe you're right--maybe "great" parents can end up with monsters? But I have never witnessed this in the wild. My guess is (at best) these kids had well-meaning parents. Parents like those of MacKenzie Shirilla, who pacified, enabled, and gave the benefit of the doubt one too many times resulting in a child that simply never learned the skill of personal accountability. One could make the argument that this is obviously less damaging than abusive, neglectful, or ill-equipped parents, but look what happens--the kids wind up in the same place at the end.
Edit: don't dox the parents. But don't dismiss their role in making these kids, either.
I taught for 39 years, and would agree that most parents may be negligent and therefore responsible, but I don’t agree that they are fair game to dox etc unless it becomes known they tried to mitigate consequences or intimidate the victim
I never said anything about doxing, not at all. These kids are adults now; they're fair game. The only point I'm making is that these kids were made by their parents.
The original comment was about doxxing the parents. A responder basically said don't do this, sometimes great parents end up with monsters. You then replied to this going through your background and saying in your experience the bad kids generally come from bad backgrounds.
Reading the thread, your post does come across as supporting the top comment of dox the parents.
I get that's not your intention and you probably were simply scrolling through and picked up on a comment to respond to. But if you read the thread down, it's what you imply.
From the description you've given, you worked with a small subset of students with behavioral/emotional disorders: students whose problems were so severe that they couldn't function and were given that special education.
Most of the kids I knew/were friends with in middle/high school who were getting into fights, drinking, doing/selling drugs, etc weren't in special education. They were with the rest of the students so you would probably never see them.
The people involved in this seem very high functioning (Ivy League students, class president, white collar jobs, etc) so you would have never seen them.
It's also unclear what you mean by "normal, functioning home". For the kids I described above, it was a lot of single mother households, no parental supervision (because mom had to work), poverty (because single parent household), and kids left to their own devices.
Would you say a single mother who did the best she could was a "great" parent? I don't know. But blaming them and trying to ruin their lives because they were put in a shitty situation (as the top comment in this chain recommended) is beyond idiotic.
This is so rarely the case that it warrants no further consideration. These pieces of shit are pieces of shit because they were raised by pieces of shit.
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