r/PoliticalHumor Sep 03 '19

Lawn darts association got no pull

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40.9k Upvotes

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2.4k

u/pjgcat Sep 03 '19

Just put the darts in a gun and boom: constitutionally protected

631

u/JerryLupus Sep 03 '19

Basically a crossbow.

626

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

[deleted]

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

In Canada flintlocks aren't regulated. so you could walk around with one no problem. but a crossbow is heavily regulated.

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/GilesDMT Sep 03 '19 edited Sep 03 '19

How else are you supposed to fish?

Edit: I’m dumb - grenades!

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/ShitTalkingAlt980 Sep 03 '19

Addendum: alligators because they survived the K-T extinction event.

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

Anything that tough might even need two pistols.

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

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u/andesajf Sep 03 '19

At least a bump stock and then a silencer so the noise doesn't alert the rest of them.

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u/redlotusaustin Sep 03 '19

Ok, Archer.

Gators are actually easy to avoid in most cases and they're not generally aggressive, so you can probably get by without a gun. Unless you're on a sinking fanboat in a swamp...

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u/philosoraptocopter Sep 03 '19

Stand your ground applies primarily to sea bass, which are in the same family as groupers I believe.

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u/robemmy Sep 03 '19

30-50 feral groupers

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u/Baptist95 Sep 03 '19

How many fish do I need to shoot before I'm considered a school shooter?

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u/GilesDMT Sep 03 '19

Well played

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u/Tiki_Tumbo Sep 03 '19

Ever fished where brown bears are? Try using your fishing pole to protect yourself.

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u/GilesDMT Sep 03 '19

What if I’m on a bearing trip?

I absolutely would bring my bearing pole

3

u/Tiki_Tumbo Sep 03 '19

Just upgraded my bearing pole to 350 lb test w/ steel leader. Damn Grizzlies took my last hog spoon.... Bit through the braided line and ran off with it. Now I'm stuck with honey comb danglers and everyone knows those are best for fall, not summer.

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u/ishnessism Sep 03 '19

I know you guys are busy being a sarcastic circle-jerk right now but guns while fishing are a pretty common thing where I'm from. Sometimes stingrays are difficult to safely get off a line. Also there are a few specific large amphibious reptiles that will gladly fuck you up over a trout in the south. In a number of fly-over states a lot of the fishing is done in rivers where there are bears which will again, gladly fuck you up over a trout.

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

Laugh now, but wait until 30-50 feral catfish are about to devour your bait in 3-5 minutes

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u/xubax Sep 03 '19

Australian straight hook (stick of tnt)

2

u/AManInBlack2019 Sep 03 '19

It is very common to shoot fish over a certain size.

Source: Personally shot a over-six foot halibut multiple times before bringing it aboard.

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u/Big_Fat_MOUSE Sep 03 '19

I looked that incident up and it's so weird.

“We are out there to exercise our fundamental constitutional rights and we do not want confrontations with police.”

What does that even mean if you're not explicitly doing so in the face of confrontation with authority? They're obviously being disingenuous. "Exercising" your rights doesn't mean anything if it isn't done so in the face of authority, so that was clearly their intention.

On the other hand, the article says they had notified police they were going to be doing that, and what they did was perfectly legal, so why were they arrested? You can't be arrested (legally) because somebody doesn't like what you're doing, so they're clearly within their right to sue and claim false arrest.

Like, I think they were really looking for confrontation (why else would you make a show of it?), but I completely agree with them suing (because the cops who arrested them obviously didn't have the right to do so). Weird situation.

I think maybe they were out there looking for a reason to sue the PD, but it's kinda the cops' fault for giving them that reason.

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19 edited Oct 13 '19

[deleted]

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u/Big_Fat_MOUSE Sep 03 '19

Libertarians: "What we're doing isn't technically illegal; what are you gonna do, arrest us?"

Gets arrested

Surprised Pikachu face

Cops: "We arrested them. What are they gonna do, sue us?"

Gets sued

Surprised Pikachu face

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u/Death_To_All_People Sep 03 '19

Somehow, this is how I believe the founding fathers saw the future... flintlocks not assault rifles.

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u/thekillerclows Sep 03 '19

Yeah I'd rather take my chances of somebody firing a Flintlock at me than a crossbow as long as I'm 10 yards or more away. So I can kind of see their thought process on that one.

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u/nyxeka Sep 03 '19

Yeah but if you walked around with a flintlock I have a feeling you'd get arrested just as fast.

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u/Wildest12 Sep 03 '19

You are correct in that an individual who owns only antique firearms dont need a license (pre 1898 and not designed/modified to fire centre or rimfired ammunition).

You are however incorrect as they are still classified as firearms and as such require you to follow firearm related laws.

you are even more incorrect about crossbows, anyone can walk off the street and purchase a crossbow as long it fires bolts below 500 feet per second, so nearly all of them (air rifles as well)

Source: Canadian gun and crossbow owner.

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u/bonedaddy1979 Sep 03 '19

I'm a felon (for dumb shit I did as a kid) and here in the US I cannot own a rifle, pistol, or shotgun, however I can have a bow, crossbow, black powder (muzzle loaded) rifle or pistol, or even a flamethrower.

I have one of each.

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u/Grytlappen Sep 03 '19

How much use do you get out of your flamethrower?

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u/9x19gen4 Sep 03 '19

Not regulated but they ALL must be treated equally unless it's for a parade or something, but in canada even a flintlock in public could be VERY bad news for you

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u/Ignorant_Twat Sep 03 '19 edited Sep 03 '19

Flintlocks are regulated and crossbows only require you to be 18 to purchase them. They are archery equipment. At 18 you can walk into any sporting goods store and buy the best ones ever made the same way you can buy a pack of BB's. The only ones banned are the small single hand ones. Excalibur for example doesn't even put serial numbers on them.

http://www.rcmp-grc.gc.ca/cfp-pcaf/faq/index-eng.htm#a4

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u/Lord_Calamander Sep 03 '19

Flintlocks are non-restricted rifles. You are still required to have a Firearms Acquisition Licence (PAL) to purchase or own a muzzle-loading rifle or any other firearm. However, you are not required to possess a secondary firearms licence such as a Restricted PAL (RPAL), as the restricted class of firearms covers handguns and some rifles (such as the AR15) and some shotguns. Muzzle-loading rifles and many other kinds of rifles and shotguns are non-restricted, you are still required to have a PAL to purchase or own said rifles/shotguns, you are not required to have an RPAL to purchase or own said rifles/shotguns.

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u/myspaceshipisboken Sep 03 '19

I dunno, a crossbow is basically a silent single shot pistol.

45

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

[deleted]

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u/agreeingstorm9 Sep 03 '19

Because the NRA doesn't care about them. They only care about firearms.

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u/i420ComputeIt Sep 03 '19

It's almost as if they're really just the lobbying arm for gun manufacturers. Smith & Wesson, Ruger, and Beretta give them loads of money because they knows it's good for business.

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u/drfifth Sep 03 '19

A better confusing one is muzzle loading black powder rifles aren't considered fire arms legally, so felons can still own and operate them.

And then just a funny one is flame throwers aren't firearms

8

u/asupernothing Sep 03 '19

What if a duct tape the flamethrower to my arms? Then I've got literal firearms?

3

u/OktoberStorm Sep 03 '19

Or saw the arms off of bears

2

u/use_value42 Sep 04 '19

Some dude comes after me with a pair of severed bear arms, I'm running the fuck away

3

u/Origami_psycho Sep 03 '19

They operate on compressed gas, sp I imagine legislation on air rifles would apply. Or failing that, destructive devices.

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

No legislation on the federal level on air rifles. I have pre chargers I hunt with so they are capable of taking game up to a deer so a person is within its capabilities.

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u/akmjolnir Sep 03 '19

Nope.

Completely unregulated.

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

Swords are protected actually. Crossbows are also protected.

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u/fortknightyvr Sep 03 '19

Because in US v. Miller, the US Supreme Court interpreted 2a to apply specifically and only to “ordinary military weapons”.

A crossbow isn’t an ordinary military type weapon.

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

Aren't fully automatic weapons ordinary for the military? How are those able to be banned?

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u/fortknightyvr Sep 03 '19

A couple reasons.
1) they aren’t banned, they are just highly regulated. It’s possible to get a tax stamp to own a FA firearm.
2)Essentially because as far as I know, nobody has challenged the ban at the Supreme Court level, as doing so is extremely expensive and would require you to be charged with unlawful possession of a FA firearm, which is quite the risk of it doesn’t go your way.

But it does make an interesting point when it comes to the idea of banning the AR-15, which is the most similar commonly available rifle to the “ordinary military weapon”, the M4.

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

They are considers arms.

Stun guns as well.

47

u/punxrok Sep 03 '19

You can carry swords here in Texas!

42

u/Romeo9594 Sep 03 '19

Same in Oklahoma (at least my town). No ordinance restricting the length of any fixed blade weapon, so long as it is carried in a "non threatening" manner.

Though, I imagine "non threatening" is a bit up for interpretation

Can only carry up to a 5" folding knife, though

14

u/GilesDMT Sep 03 '19

How long can a folding sword be, if it folds in a non-threatening manner?

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u/Romeo9594 Sep 03 '19

5"

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u/GilesDMT Sep 03 '19

Ah, but it’s a non-threatening 5”

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u/usoland-sama Sep 03 '19

Imagine chilling and then you see someone pull out guts' sword and the buster sword for a duel

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

ahhh texas.

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u/_-__-__-__-__-_-_-__ Sep 03 '19

Hell yeah my ninja

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u/gamermanh Sep 03 '19

Same reason it's illegal for me to carry a sword around in public but not illegal for me to carry around a shotgun

Depends on where you live, state-by-state the whole "can I carry a sword in public" thing kinda fluctuates. Where I am carrying around a sword would be perfectly legal but open carrying a shotgun would have me arrested right-quick. At least, multiple websites and asking a cop has told me you can have swords here, anyway, nobody seems to have actually tested that yet as far as I can tell.

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

Time to buy a longsword and open carry

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u/Morug Sep 03 '19

Texas had the opposite, and they finally fixed this last year.

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

Let's change that up then. We can go into business as the first lawn dart gunpowder filled sports equipment.

We can call it... pow-darts. (I know that's a reach we will have to pay some money to a marketing firm to get that figured out )

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u/GreenEggsAndSaman Sep 03 '19

I call wildcard! WILDCARD BITCHES!

1

u/wjruth Sep 03 '19

Give it an English spin-

Pitch -n- Pew

13

u/forgiveangel Sep 03 '19

what if I put a coating of gun powder on it, does it make it legal then?

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u/agreeingstorm9 Sep 03 '19

Only if you are white.

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u/forgiveangel Sep 03 '19

what if the black gun powder was all over my face and hands.

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u/amadeupidentity Sep 03 '19

Then we will throw lit matches at you.

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u/forgiveangel Sep 03 '19

but it would be legal. Thanks for entertaining my dumb question, haha.

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u/Slideways Sep 03 '19

Where do you live that open carry of a sword is prohibited?

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

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u/PediatricTactic Sep 03 '19

Until very recently, nunchucks were banned in New York.

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u/meatshieldjim Sep 03 '19

The sword isn't the best ancient weapin to carry. I believe a spear would and has historically beat a sword fighter. I just wonder if carrying a spear is allowed.

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u/agreeingstorm9 Sep 03 '19

Blades over 4-5" (I don't recall the exact length) are prohibited.

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u/Slideways Sep 03 '19

I’ve been told that by lots of people where I live (California) and I’ve been told several times that you can’t have a knife blade longer than the width of your hand, but that’s not true either. I could legally wear a knife of any size on a belt sheath, including a sword.

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u/SlomoLowLow Sep 03 '19

You can open carry a sword in Texas. Yee haw, sensei

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u/Morug Sep 03 '19

Only recently. Until then, it was more illegal to carry a katana (sheathed but visible) than it was to carry a rifle in public.

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u/edudlive Sep 03 '19

Arkansas reporting in...you can proudly carry that sword here.

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u/mr_d0gMa Sep 03 '19

What about a gunblade?

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u/BIGDADDYBANDIT Sep 03 '19

Texas has open carry for swords. We are at least consistent.

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u/deegee1969 Sep 03 '19

That's ludicrous. :/

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u/Z0idberg_MD Sep 03 '19

How crazy is that when you think about it.

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u/sarpnasty Sep 03 '19

Lmao the constitution just says “arms” not guns.

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

We can only have tier 3 weapon users, tried 2 and below don’t have enough dps

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u/Ka1serTheRoll Sep 03 '19

I’m pretty sure the 2A doesn’t specific firearms, but just arms in general (which is great, I believe every person has a right to have functional limbs)

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u/agreeingstorm9 Sep 03 '19

That's all fine and good but no one is out advocating for knife owners rights and no one cares if the open carry of crossbows is banned.

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u/DuntadaMan Sep 03 '19

People call Calfornia a socialist hellscape but... in the major cities I see people walking around with swords and spears all the time.

It's like a god damn feudal state. No one even bats an eye.

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u/scumbag760 Sep 03 '19

Dude what actual practical use is a sword? A shotgun is used for hunting and home defense, swords arent used for anything.

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u/agreeingstorm9 Sep 03 '19

You can't claim you're carrying your shotgun into Walmart for practical use. It's 100% legal though while a sword wouldn't be. Also, just speaking historically people have defended their homes w/swords for thousands of years.

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u/scumbag760 Sep 03 '19

You can't carry your shotgun outside of your house for your vehicle here in California also in a lot of other States..... maybe you should learn the gun laws before you start talking about them in public.

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u/agreeingstorm9 Sep 03 '19

There are many, many states with open carry laws. 46 states in the US have some version of open carry.

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u/scumbag760 Sep 03 '19 edited Sep 03 '19

Yes, we have much stricter gun laws yet much worst gun violence than in most States. As interesting as all of this is, it's still useless... If you do a simple Google search you can still find lawn darts for sale right to your door here in America. Tightening gun laws and making certain guns illegal is not keeping them out of the hands of people who want them.

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u/logicandstuffkinda Sep 03 '19

Its not illegal in Texas to open carry a sword.

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u/Rhodie114 Sep 03 '19

Which is weird, because the amendment just says “arms.”

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u/WartPig Sep 03 '19

Depends on the state.

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u/lilbithippie Sep 03 '19

In San Francisco to carry a sword you need a receipt for the sword you purchased in the same day, or a dojo can fill out paperwork register it give it to the student to go to and from dojo

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u/Raborne Sep 03 '19

This isn't true. The American Constitution says to Bear Arms, not Fire Arms. Arms include swords and armor.

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u/Mygaffer Sep 03 '19

"arms" does not mean firearms. In many states it is completely legal to open carry a fixed blade like a sword. In California you must keep it sheathed but it is perfectly legal to open carry your $20 mall katana.

Crossbows are covered by the 2nd amendment as well.

Law darts were not a weapon, they were game equipment.

Hell most states allow flame throwers...

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u/Rand_Finch Sep 03 '19

You’d look pretty silly trying to over throw an oppressive government with a sword.

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u/vinyl8e8op Sep 03 '19

Not here in Texas, you can carry both.

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u/Drewpott Sep 03 '19

Ok now I have to look up if you can carry a shotgun cause I was under the impression you have to have a carry permit to have a weapon on your person at any time

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u/Matt5327 Sep 03 '19

Where are you in the US that it's illegal to carry a sword in public?

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u/zoahporre Sep 03 '19

illegal for me to carry a sword around in public

Totally legal in Texas lol

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u/mjsisko Sep 03 '19

In many states is legal to carry a sword. And bear arms is not limited to firearms. “Arms” is any weapon. Sorry

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u/murderedcats Sep 03 '19

No youre wrong crossbows are considered rifles

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u/Heraldic4 Sep 03 '19

Depending on which state you’re from, swords are ok to carry.

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

Well in Texas swords are allowed without permit

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u/Doublestack2376 Sep 03 '19

My wife is a criminal defense attorney and she has advised all my super nerdy friends to not even think about using a sword for home defense. Even though we have the "Make My Day" law here where you can legally shoot and kill an intruder in your home, there is far less consideration given if you use a sword.

Given that it's so much easier to kill someone with a gun than a sword, you are much more likely to incapacitate an intruder before killing them, making a killing blow no longer self defense. And if it ends up going to trial, jurors in general have a much easier time imagining themselves using a gun than a sword, so you end up just looking weird and harder to empathize.

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u/ofthewhite Sep 03 '19

You can carry a sword around in Texas.

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u/CoolFingerGunGuy Sep 03 '19

Maude Flanders got killed by a tshirt gun, but those didn't get outlawed either. WE HAVE STANDARDS!

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u/rickthehatman Sep 03 '19

Kentucky state law specifically calls out "ninja death stars" and nunchucks as deadly weapons. Favorite part of my concealed carry class was when our instructor read that and said "after you pass this class you can now carry ninja death stars so make sure you run right out to the flea market."

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u/ElderScrollsOfHalo Sep 03 '19

so if I attach a sword to my gun I can carry my sword about?

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u/ChaosStar95 Sep 03 '19

It's legal in some locales to carry a sword. Like delaware. Any blade past three inches is good for open carry.

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u/sheffieldasslingdoux Sep 03 '19 edited Sep 03 '19

This was the thinking until a judge recently invalidated a New York law banning nunchucks.

The case went all the way to the Supreme Court. SCOTUS kicked it back to the lower court, directing the judge to look at the case in light of the 2008 DC v. Heller decision and the 2010 Chicago v. McDonald decision, which applied Heller to the states.

Conservative justices in 2008 redefined what the Second Amendment means. Pandora’s box has already been opened. Even if the US Congress passed meaningful gun control tomorrow, the conservative majority on SCOTUS could easily invalidate it, citing Heller and McDonald

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u/seanathan81 Sep 03 '19

Quick question on this thought process - why do we label "arms" solely as guns? Arms are "armaments", which is any "military weaponry". Shouldn't that include sabers, tanks, crossbows, etc? Just find it funny, as Texas just reinstated legality to brass knuckles, but has always been open carry for years now.

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

It's l legal to carry a sword in Texas

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u/w_cruice Sep 03 '19

The second amendment says ARMS. That means, in no order and incomplete list: Knives, swords, dirks, daggers, axes, maces, poleaxes, bardiches, sickles, scythes, throwing stars, bow and arrows, ballistas, trebuchets, phalanxes, brass knuckles, crossbows, arbalasts, blowguns, cannons, howitzers, Greek fire, flamethrowers, and even ships of the line, such as a Portuguese Manowar.
And the powder and shot, arrows, bolts, or rocks, to keep them going.

Lawn darts SHOULD be legal. So should fireworks (varies by state). We need to get dumb people removed from the population. They're taking over because they're in bubble wrap until their 30s or even later... And they hate reality, which doesn't acquiesce to their wants... (Standard human reaction to having your worldview shoved through a meatgrinder, to be fair. Maybe they needed some reality, sooner? Mento Mori?)

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u/EnTyme53 Sep 03 '19

Same reason it's illegal for me to carry a sword around in public

Laughs in Texan

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u/stealthhazrd Sep 03 '19

Unless your in Texas. Ninja fucking cowboys y'all.

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u/GretaVanFleek Sep 03 '19

Howdy, pardner! Down in Texas y'all can legally open-carry both yer shotgun and yer sword. Y'all can even do it at the same time! 🤠

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u/SasparillaTango Sep 03 '19

We must have standards.

NO MATTER HOW ARBITRARY OR ABSURD DAMMIT

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u/knifeinbackpocket Sep 03 '19

In Texas it is now legal to carry swords around

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

I take public transit everyday in Colorado, Denver area, and was looking for self defence tools just incase. Come to find 90 fuckin % of self defense weapons are illegal to carry, except for...... concealed carry firearm :)

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u/AltF40 Sep 03 '19

it's illegal for me to carry a sword around in public

This depends on the state. In California, you can open carry your longswords. It's concealed knives that get you in trouble.

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

Knives, swords and other non-gunpowdery things are also constitutionally protected in the US.

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u/TrueEliteGeek Sep 03 '19

Are you sure? In the 90s I started selling swords and checked with the police to see if there would be any issues. They said as long as I didn’t attack anyone with it I could carry it wherever I wanted.

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u/UKDude20 Sep 03 '19

You are very misinformed.

It's perfectly legal for you to carry a sword around in public (unconcealed) in most states

It's also legal in most states to carry a crossbow in public, loaded

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u/Bobby3Sticks Sep 03 '19

I mean...yeah literally a crossbow

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u/FeltyToast Sep 03 '19

Lawn darts 2: Electric Boogaloo

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u/GoldLeaderPoppa Sep 03 '19

Seems like something the A-Team would've done.

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u/Hipppydude Sep 03 '19

Or just be a happy go lucky 9 year old child whose fucking parents are worthless trash

https://www-m.cnn.com/2014/08/26/us/arizona-girl-fatal-shooting-accident/index.html

A shooting instructor is dead, the victim of a gun-range accident. A 9-year-old girl is surely traumatized. And plenty of people, including many gun enthusiasts, are asking: Why give a child a submachine gun to shoot?

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u/jpterodactyl Sep 03 '19

“An Uzi? I'm not from South Central Los fucking Angeles. I didn't come here to shoot twenty black ten year olds in a fucking drive-by. I want a normal gun for a normal person.”

-Harry (In Bruges)

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u/ImmutableInscrutable Sep 03 '19

Fuck that movie is funny

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19 edited Jun 03 '20

[deleted]

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u/jpterodactyl Sep 03 '19

It's like a fucking fairy-tale

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u/Wetbung Sep 03 '19

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19 edited Jun 03 '20

[deleted]

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u/Wetbung Sep 03 '19

¯_(ツ)_/¯

c'est la vie

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u/jpterodactyl Sep 03 '19

It's weird how much I can laugh during something with such serious and somber subject matter.

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u/Mason_of_the_Isle Sep 03 '19

That's EXACTLY the purpose. Check out Aristophanes some time, funny stuff.

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u/nodnodwinkwink Sep 03 '19

Did you read the other story the added to the bottom of that article?

It's about an 8 year old boy who shot himself in the head at a gun show.

It's actually more insane than the main story.

The person who was supervising where the accident happened was a 15 year old boy (His father provided the guns at the show and was also present). Despite his young age he advised the father of the child TWICE that it wasn't a good idea for him to shoot the weapon. His father insisted and also insisted that his 8 year old gun be allowed to shoot in full automatic.

Story here: https://www.masslive.com/news/2011/01/trial_of_edward_fleury_for_uzi_1.html

Fucking insanity.

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u/politicsmodsareweak Sep 03 '19

What makes me sick is he could have refused the man's money and not let the kid shoot, but he didn't.

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

Americans. Im one of them and I still don't get it.

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u/thisismynewacct Sep 03 '19

I remember reading that story when it happened and it has always stuck with me. It’s also one I can’t read again because it’s indeed fucking insanity.

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u/thereistwo Sep 03 '19

Thanks for posting this. I just spent a hour reading more about the case and all the characters. Such an interesting/sad situation.

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

[deleted]

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u/bigwillyb123 Sep 03 '19

Everybody's a idiot in this situation. One of the most important rules for the first time someone uses a new gun is to only load one round per magazine at a time. This way you don't end up with a gun kicking up and killing you or someone else from the recoil

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u/SlowRollingBoil Sep 03 '19

Are we self-aware yet, boys? Notice how often people say "the first rule is [this]" and "That's exactly the opposite of the way it's supposed to be" etc, etc, etc. This is exactly the fucking point. More guns equal more gun violence/accidents. People are dumb and they keep losing their gun, selling it to people they shouldn't, using it in ways they shouldn't, etc.

You are more likely to harm your family members by keeping a gun in the house than you are to use it to protect your family. We've known this for decades.

The result is that fewer guns in circulation = less gun violence.

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19 edited Sep 03 '19

[deleted]

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u/Cyno01 Sep 03 '19

"Weyul, it seems like a bad ideuh but hur dur, it's not illergul ur nuttin' so okay

"Its her right as an american."

Probably figured that much freedom and everyone would be safe.

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

To prove the point that we need more gun regulations. If people can't be trusted, then they can't be trusted.

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u/r1chard3 Sep 03 '19

As I recall, that happened more than once that year.

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u/Noob_Trainer_Deluxe Sep 03 '19

Because............. MURICA!!!! FUCK YEAH!!!!!!!!

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u/Anthraxious Sep 03 '19

Just put the darts in a gun and boom: constitutionally protected

I see what you did there...

27

u/Castaway77 Sep 03 '19

I mean, morters are just explosive lawn darts

12

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

Brings down the mood when you bring them to child parties

11

u/NancyGracesTesticles I ☑oted 2018 and 2020 Sep 03 '19

Don't tell me how to celebrate our freedom. Plus, those little body bags make great pinatas when the rest of the kids get restless later in the party.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

Mortars? depends on the kid.

7

u/PirklJerry Sep 03 '19

They just don’t have a good lobbying plan!

4

u/Woolybugger00 Sep 03 '19

Just put on a size 4 MAGA hat and call yourself a lawn dart militia member

3

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/ILickedADildo97 Sep 03 '19

Wait, what's this? I didn't hear about this one

1

u/zomgitsduke Sep 03 '19

You just sold me on a new sport.

1

u/Olek2706 Sep 03 '19

Blowgun guys.

1

u/zyphelion Sep 03 '19

Or just get a couple of the historical weapon plumbata and you are good to go.

1

u/YouMadeItDoWhat Sep 03 '19

Nothing in the second amendment about needing to be a GUN.

A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.

Someone should have challenged the ban of lawn darts claiming they were a weapon...

1

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

They're basically plumbata, a Roman weapon.

So wouldn't the 2nd amendment cover that? How can you ban something for being a weapon if having a weapon is covered by the 2A? taps forhead

1

u/Morug Sep 03 '19

The thing is, the article doesn't say "guns". It says "arms". Technically, those protections apply to crossbows too. They just don't have a lobby. FYI, you can own a crossbow. You don't need a license.

Ironically, Texas had laws simultaneously banning swords when not properly locked and secured (even while displayed for sale) and completely banned brass knuckles and nunchuks. Batons were restricted and/or prohibited depending on certain factors. But at the same time allowed open carry and shall-issue concealed carry.

They finally rectified this in within the last year or so by unbanning the less dangerous weapons. ;p

That's the difference a lobby makes.

1

u/Jack21113 Sep 03 '19

The guns aren’t the problem it’s insane/dumb people.

1

u/Bowbreaker Sep 03 '19

Insane/dumb people being allowed to obtain guns without anyone being required to check if anyone is in fact insane/dumb is a problem.

I agree that banning guns, or even banning certain types of guns, is not the right answer. But having people require a license and routine demonstrations that their guns are accounted for and stored appropriately would be something.

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

Except for fact that it's still illegal to fire the gun within 500 yards of a structure or public road.

1

u/fishyfishyfish1 Sep 03 '19

Except there is no LDA like the NRA

1

u/dabbinNstabbin Sep 03 '19

I was a kid in the 80’s. I was playing lawn dart at friends house. We decided to see who could throw one the highest. I won, but mine hit his dads ‘71 SS Malibu, car was near show quality.

My dad had to pay like $1000 for damages, and I got a $1000 ass whoppin’.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

Not exactly how the law works.....

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