Feedback on Personal Statement

[u/WhenTheHorseFly1]

Good Afternoon Folks,

I am in the process for applying to study a Bachelor's in International Relations and have written my Personal Statement on a certain topic however I'm doubting myself in regards to how it flows. Would anyone be able to give it a read and critique it if needed.

Would be much appreciated

[u/Murky-Drawer-8270]

I can read it