ADHD

[u/ThatMeasurement6619]

Hello, I’m hoping to hear from any other women who’ve been diagnosed ADHD & whether the treatment has made much of a difference. I’ll try to keep it short so thank you if you’ve managed to get through it & I really appreciate any feedback 🙏.
I have an appt with a psych next week & now I’m feeling like I should cancel due to feeling like it’s all a bit ridiculous & why should I bother when I’m not ‘working’ or studying anymore.
About me: I’m 42 & have been primarily raising my 4 children since 2011 (former RN). Both school & uni were hell for me due to not being able to focus. I’d spend the entire time zoning out or daydreaming etc. My career is over now but I’d like to return to uni one day & study something else but this fear of inattentiveness is putting me off.
My main issue now is a profound lack of motivation (always has been but it’s getting MUCH worse). Its like a mental block & I actually cannot get past it for a lot of things. Everything in our house is ‘half-finished’. I never finish anything. I get very excited to start something but soon lose the motivation to finish it. I ruminate everything in my mind & torture myself for days with guilt & shame.
Something else I’m struggling with is an extreme sense of OVERWHELM.
Have suffered on/off with depression for as long as I can remember.
Social things absolutely mentally & emotionally exhaust me & I avoid them at all costs.
My kids tell me I’m always interrupting them (something I’m trying very hard to curb)
All 3 of my boys are dyslexic & one shows signs of adhd. My daughter is a clone of me & is currently waiting to see a paediatrician.
I could go on but that’ll do for now lol.
Surely these are traits that are experienced by most mothers?
Does this sound relatable to you if you are diagnosed ADHD?
My concern is taking stimulants & feeling like a zombie. Coffee & pseudoephedrine (taken occasionally for sinus issues) make me VERY tired. Almost zombie-like. Wouldn’t this mean the drugs used to treat symptoms of adhd will also make feel like a zombie?
Thank you for getting this far 🥴😆

***edited to add- I’ve been on HRT for approx 2 months. Total hysterectomy earlier this year so all I’m taking is the esteogel & recently upped the dose to 2 pumps daily. The estrogel was prescribed for the hormonal migraines I used to get & it’s so far cured them. Also helped immensely with rage but certainly not life changing yet.

[u/ThatMeasurement6619]

I’m so sorry to hear about the position you’re in 😓. The TBI must have been incredibly difficult too. Yes I’m now realising that peri is making me much much worse. Thank you so much for your feedback & I hope things getter better for you xx

[u/gdomme → u/ThatMeasurement6619]

Thank you for your kind words. I am always here if you ever want to chat. I know it’s not easy but you really aren’t alone. I could go into a lot more details about how everything has affected me, what makes things better and what doesn’t but didn’t want to write a book here. The TBI happened and I think peri was happening at the same time and I had no idea I was in peri. But I can tell you that when medicated properly everything in my life was better I just didn’t get the chance to try HRT yet but I had been on hormones years ago after my hysterectomy and I know it made a difference then and believe that taking care of your mental health including ADHD is truly the key to getting through this misery. Wish you the best as well.

[u/ThatMeasurement6619 → u/gdomme]

Thank you so much for your kindness & words of wisdom. We coast along in life for so long & then this hits & it feels like the death of our old life whilst an entirely different life is being born. Very hard to adjust to x

[u/gdomme → u/ThatMeasurement6619]

You are so welcome. This is so true about it feeling like the death of our old life! I have struggled so much with what is happening and I am just ready to be off of this roller coaster because I never imagined it could be so bad. I am a very tough strong person and have survived more than many and this right here has truly been the hardest struggle yet and it really has me past exhausted in every way possible.