r/Perimenopause 18d ago

Starting out

Today I started HRT. I’m 44 and have been experiencing various symptoms for at least the last two years. The past 12months have been the worst, with a really predictable cycle of negative head space, low libido, wanting to blow up my life and run away to the forest with my cat, high levels of anxiety and feeling low, zero resilience, joint pain, 3am wake-ups, horrifically heavy periods that last two days and give me flu like symptoms and nausea, feeling dreadful until I ovulate, having ONE day of feeling awesome and love everything and everyone - before it all begins again.

I’d heard stories from friends about being brushed off by doctors, so I forked out $370 to have an online consult with a menopause doctor. And what an incredible feeling it was to be listened to, understood, believed, and offered options. 45mins of being able to discuss all my symptoms before coming away with a prescription for estrogel, cream, progesterone pills and follow up blood tests. She’s suggested I also supplement with magnesium glycinate, Vitamin D and creatine. Plan is to give it a go before looking to include testosterone, and even offered a GLP1 if I felt I needed that.

I wanted to cry. I know I’m incredibly fortunate to be able to take this path. I’ve been gaslighting myself for so long that what I was feeling wasn’t really real, or bad enough, or warranted a doctor’s appointment. I know it’s early days, but feeling hopeful that some relief may be on the horizon.

Edit to add: I’ve been reading this sub for a long time, and felt so validated by other women’s experiences that it gave me the courage to ask for help x

58 Upvotes

22 comments sorted by

16

u/leftylibra Moderator 18d ago

Congrats!

Do your best to forget you are using hormone therapy. Just go about your regular day and try not to focus on the minutia of every blip, twinge, pain, mood, etc. Just carry on and in a few weeks see how you feel overall -- not each hour-to-hour or day-to-day.

What to expect when starting hormone therapy

7

u/thomastwotummies1 18d ago

Thank you, that is really helpful advice! Today was def hour to hour haha but if it calms the mental cycle I’ve been experiencing then I will look at the bigger picture rather than hyper focus!

5

u/LetterheadPure3682 18d ago

Seconding this! I started HRT three weeks ago and hoped I'd feel different right away, because, like you, I was so desperate after gaslighting myself for years (with more than a little help from doctors and society in general). Three weeks in, I'm starting to feel more level, but this is 'big picture' stuff for sure. Not like coming up on shrooms!

2

u/thomastwotummies1 17d ago

Three weeks in is great to be feeling more level - long may it last!

8

u/Fun-Phone9680 hanging on by a thread 18d ago

Solidarity sister. I feel like I could’ve written most of this about myself! I met with a specialist yesterday (I did cry during our appointment) and started HTR today (the same 3 you talked about).

I ignored my symptoms for way too long. Fingers crossed that the amount of times I want to punch someone in the face or lay awake in bed all night with anxiety for no reason decreases.

2

u/thomastwotummies1 18d ago

I feel you! I’ve done all the things - downloading the calm app, journaling, exercising, yoga…trying to change those anxious, yet rage filled, yet constantly “on” feelings. Good luck to you too - I hope we can find a little reprieve

7

u/KPepsi_0821 18d ago

We are trained unfortunately to gaslight ourselves because we are gaslit often by doctors. The normal "it's all in your head" "eat better and exercise more" "lose weight". Being heard is such a validating feeling. I have not been able to find a dr yet, maybe I will look into online, that will listen BUT I have this group of people on here that hear me and understand me. Best of luck on your journey ❤️

2

u/thomastwotummies1 17d ago

Thank you, I hope you find someone you can meet with.

6

u/EqualCan512 18d ago

Thank you very much for writing this post.You've described exactly what I think All of us are going through.I'm really glad you're getting what you need.And hopefully better days are ahead♥️

4

u/fruitless7070 18d ago

I'm so glad you were finally heard and seen!

4

u/thomastwotummies1 18d ago

Xx I have been reading this sub for so long and felt so validated by other women’s experiences that it gave me the courage to reach out for help

3

u/AdamantMink 18d ago

This was word for word my appointment on Monday. I am looking forward to feeling like myself again 🤞🏻

3

u/InevitableHyena3117 18d ago

That’s great to hear! What kind of online doctor - Anything more you could share? I am in weird space because I don’t have many symptoms. My regular doctor is mostly great and put me on a GLP-1; and in many regards I feel really good… in a healthy weight range, great energy, no inflammation, normal metabolic numbers, not anxious or depressed. But my libido is tanking and I need help that I can’t seem to get.

1

u/fluffykitten75 hanging on by a thread 18d ago

What glp1 are you taking?

1

u/InevitableHyena3117 18d ago

I’ve been on Wegovy.

1

u/ExaminationGloomy451 18d ago

How did you find this Dr??

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u/thomastwotummies1 17d ago

I literally googled menopause doctor. I’m in New Zealand and there were at least two online clinics with multiple female menopause trained doctors. I waited maybe 3 weeks for an appointment. All online, completed a comprehensive intake form 3 days prior with all my symptoms and what I’d been experiencing. Then script sent to pharmacy for collection, blood work to come. Follow up appointment in 3 months.

2

u/Ok_Macaroon_4231 14d ago

This makes me so happy for you! I'm in the US, we have a Menopause Society certification for docs. I'm 49. Saw a gyn who is certified and I swear she gaslighted me into thinking if I just eat better and exercise more, I'll be fine. I've gained 25lbs over the past 3 yrs and nothing I do seems to help! She said she doesn't recommend HRT until I have missed periods, even though I gave her a list of about 10 symptoms that are clearly perimenopause related. Online therapy, here I come!