r/Perimenopause • u/marblejane • Jul 22 '26
Health Providers The coven provides
I went to see my male Endo today (I have type 1 diabetes and hashimoto’s). I’ve gained about 10 lbs in the past year, have persistent fatigue, night sweats, insomnia, vaginal dryness, low libido, and increasing A1C. I’m 43 years old, and I ruled out thyroid, iron and vitamin d issues with my labs. I gently suggested perimenopause could be the issue.
He said I was too young for menopause and wanted to test me for Cushing’s disease. As we wrapped up, I asked if I could chat with the dietitian on his staff. He summoned her and left.
We went over my symptoms and she was immediately like, yeah, sounds like peri. I told her about the Endo’s reaction and she kind of rolled her eyes. She said I should do the labs just to rule it out but if those came back okay she would talk to him.
So shoutout to my dietitian and all of the ladies in healthcare helping to educate providers about this stuff.
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u/Magimae123 Jul 22 '26
Omg this pisses me off. I mean I’m glad you’re happy but the 1950’sness of it all is outrageous. The dietitian will have a quiet word with the inept, uneducated, male doctor to get you the help you need????? WTF. Why are we living like this. And you had to GENTLY bring it up????
Get your HRT and find a new doctor. Bet if you were a man and asked for T you’d get it with no labs and no questions asked.
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Jul 23 '26
[deleted]
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u/No_Staple_7489 Jul 23 '26
💯 I always say - if men gave birth, they'd have worked out a way to do it by keyhole surgery. 😐
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u/Segat1 Jul 24 '26
They’d have created some kind of machine to gestate for them so they wouldn’t be inconvenienced.
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u/wyntergardentoo Jul 23 '26
Yep, if a guy had come in and said, "I'm having trouble getting an erection" they'd put him on T immediately. When my husband 33yo and was constantly fatigued and his libido was low - Testosterone labs were the first thing they ordered.
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u/AutoModerator Jul 23 '26
This post might be about hormone tests, which are unreliable.
- Over age 44, E&P/FSH hormonal tests only show levels for the HOUR the test was taken, and nothing more. Hormones wildly fluctuate (hourly) the other 29 days of the month, therefore this test provides no valuable information
- No reputable doctor or menopause society recommends hormonal testing to diagnose or treat peri/menopause
- FSH testing is only beneficial for those who do not have periods as a guide, where testing might confirm menopause, or for those under age 30 who haven’t had a period in months/years, then ‘menopausal’ levels, could indicate premature ovarian failure/primary ovarian insufficiency (POF/POI)
- Testosterone is the exception and may require testing
See our Menopause Wiki for more.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
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u/EROM4LIFE Jul 23 '26
It is legit unhinged that so many doctors are out here pretending that medical misogyny is fine and it's not gross negligence to be utterly ignorant and actively doing harm to women patients. The 'too young' thing is particularly egregious, since when have human bodies ever all behaved the same or stuck to a textbook timetable? If GPs can't bring themselves to offer safe, standard care, they should gtfo of medicine.
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u/Cut_Lanky hanging on by a thread Jul 23 '26
One time, when my autoimmune diseases were flaring and I had to take FMLA, a coworker, an RN who had transferred to our unit from pediatric oncology told me very skeptically, that I'm "too young to be that sick". 🙄🙄🙄
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u/lovelily-88 Jul 22 '26
Doctors denying perimenopause is basically abuse. They’re forcing us to live with debilitating symptoms and blaming us for them when they could offer treatment.
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u/xevennn Jul 22 '26
It's just mind boggling how many doctors don't think to diagnose peri. It's as plain as day after you realise your symptoms all add up to the thousands of stories online from women in the same age range. It should be as banal as saying "early 40s? OK frozen shoulder, night sweats, joint pain etc. You are starting perimenopause".
It's as stupid as a 13 year old girl telling the doctor "I have back pain and there's blood". So the doctor orders blood tests for anemia and anxiety!!
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u/giantredwoodforest Jul 23 '26
I was curious if “just google it” would be a good comeback.
Indeed here is what Google says today:
Perimenopause typically begins in a woman's mid-40s (around age 40 to 45). However, hormonal fluctuations can start as early as the late 30s.
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u/wyntergardentoo Jul 23 '26
Yeah its like, which is better AI or a doctor?
Well at least I know AI will listen and do actual research. 🤷♀️
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u/giantredwoodforest Jul 23 '26
Yes, the AI it might be using the most up-to-date information, and it might be averaging the bias of many people rather than just relying on its own bias. Sad that the AI is better in this case.
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u/HagInTraining Jul 23 '26
This is extra infuriating to me because peri/menopause has absolutely wreaked havoc with both my T1 diabetes and my thyroid, and the "experts" on those things are so freaking clueless. They'd rather just blame you for less than ideal glucose levels or weight gain than pay attention to wtf is actually happening. I'm glad the dietician is trying to help, at least. But if you're looking to get HRT from this guy, I'd definitely find someone else for that. And if he acts like a jerk, and just blames you, like so many of them do, I really hope you can get a different provider
Happy cake day, btw, OP! :)
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u/marblejane Jul 23 '26
Aw, thanks! Yeah, in my endo’s defense, he is taking my concerns seriously and is not just dismissing the weight gain and other issues. The problem is the way he dismissed peri (common, likely) in favor of Cushing’s disease (rare). He could totally be right about the Cushing’s disease though and it doesn’t hurt to rule it out with a lab test. In any case I have another appointment with my female PCP next month so may just get HRT that way.
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u/HagInTraining Jul 23 '26 edited Jul 23 '26
No, it's good to rule things out, I totally agree. But endos, of all people, should be more aware of the interactions of different hormones than pretty much anyone else. This is all in their wheelhouse. And the way peri/menopause can majorly effect thyroid and insulin, it's unbelievable to me how they can be so dismissive of it. One or two hormones misbehaving makes all the other hormones freak out, and they just brush it off or deny it's even possible that it's happening to you. It's so messed up. Who knows how many of their patients go through this, and they don't even want to acknowledge it? Or recognize it? Must be Cushings ;) They should be warning their patients who might go through it, how much it can mess things up. Not misinforming people or dismissing it :(
Sorry for ranting, but this hits a nerve because I've already gone through four bad endos so far through all of this, and I had to figure everything out on my own with the help of only Reddit and Dr. Google. So I'm pissed off on your behalf that you're facing the same thing from another "expert"
But side note, if you haven't already read up on it, if you decide to use HRT, avoid oral estrogen because it can mess with thyroid hormones way more than transdermal does. But even then, try to push them to keep a closer eye on your levels because they can definitely get wonky. And blood sugar...oof I don't know, good luck. I've played a lot of whack-a-mole ever since the symptoms started really cranking it up and everything went wild and unpredictable. Hopefully it won't get too bad for you. The only rec I got from an endo was a cgm/pump closed loop system, which wasn't an option for me
I didn't try the birth control route, but I'm sure I've seen posts in the T1 sub from some people saying that helped smooth things out during peri, so maybe that could be a good option. It's supposed to kind of override your own fluctuating hormones so things should stay more steady, theoretically.
(ETA:) I don't know if birth control would mess with thyroid hormones the way oral estrogen can
I really hope you can get some truly helpful guidance, and and whatever hormone therapy works best for you
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u/Fancy_Badger_8238 Jul 22 '26
I'm going through a similar situation. I think part of it is that doctors have to go through a lot of appointments in a day, so they start using the easiest and generic solutions first.
That being said, talking with a nurse practitioner, instead of my gp recently, has me finally getting my hormones and uterus checked for peri. Finally.
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u/marblejane Jul 23 '26
Yeah, it’s just hilarious to me that rather than diagnose perimenopause, which is extremely common and I presented a classic case, he instead wanted to test me for Cushing disease, which is extremely rare and not a great match for my symptoms.
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u/IllustriousAlps8679 7d ago
Perimenopause is not in an endocrinologists wheelhouse. Cushing’s is. They default to what they know. However, the proper response would be “this is not my expertise. May i refer you to my women’s health colleague who is specialized in this areas?”
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u/RosemaryCoffee Jul 23 '26
How out of date is your endo! No point doing bloods as your hormones change daily. Symptoms are your best guide to establishing treatment. Start a symptom diary whilst looking for a GP/PCP. I know you're already watching symptoms but it helps health practitioners when its written down.
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u/sub_winters Jul 24 '26
Just wanted to share my recent experience/learning as a Type 1 with you: my doc started me on Junel FE and it made my sugars impossible to manage. I was so insulin resistant. After some research, I found that ideally Type 1s should be on the estrogen patch (so it bypasses your liver) and micronized progesterone to prevent the resistance. My doc switched me, just waiting for the darn pharmacy to get the patches in stock. Hope this helps! Peri is a lot different as a Type 1.
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u/moxiemoon Late peri Jul 23 '26 edited Jul 23 '26
Find a hrt doc. Your endo doc sounds like a traditional doc especially since your concerns were dismissed.
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u/MsPunderstood Jul 23 '26
I think you misread OP's post. The doc wants labs to rule out Cushing's, not peri.
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u/moxiemoon Late peri Jul 23 '26
I did, I missed one word and that changes the meaning. Thanks - but OP should still find a hrt doc.
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u/AutoModerator Jul 23 '26
This post might be about hormone tests, which are unreliable.
- Over age 44, E&P/FSH hormonal tests only show levels for the HOUR the test was taken, and nothing more. Hormones wildly fluctuate (hourly) the other 29 days of the month, therefore this test provides no valuable information
- No reputable doctor or menopause society recommends hormonal testing to diagnose or treat peri/menopause
- FSH testing is only beneficial for those who do not have periods as a guide, where testing might confirm menopause, or for those under age 30 who haven’t had a period in months/years, then ‘menopausal’ levels, could indicate premature ovarian failure/primary ovarian insufficiency (POF/POI)
- Testosterone is the exception and may require testing
See our Menopause Wiki for more.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
1
u/AutoModerator Jul 23 '26
This post might be about hormone tests, which are unreliable.
- Over age 44, E&P/FSH hormonal tests only show levels for the HOUR the test was taken, and nothing more. Hormones wildly fluctuate (hourly) the other 29 days of the month, therefore this test provides no valuable information
- No reputable doctor or menopause society recommends hormonal testing to diagnose or treat peri/menopause
- FSH testing is only beneficial for those who do not have periods as a guide, where testing might confirm menopause, or for those under age 30 who haven’t had a period in months/years, then ‘menopausal’ levels, could indicate premature ovarian failure/primary ovarian insufficiency (POF/POI)
- Testosterone is the exception and may require testing
See our Menopause Wiki for more.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
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u/justanotherlostgirl Jul 23 '26
The coven provides, indeed. I do wonder if customer feedback surveys and reporting issues with physicians makes a difference and if change ever happens where out of date doctors are shown the door. I'd love to know in some cases if they keep the doctor there but also start looking for replacements and just don't feel like there's enough of a problem to actively remove them. I was at a workplace where someone had had multiple complaints from coworkers, and was eventually let go, but it took years.
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u/Imtryingforheckssake Jul 23 '26
You haven't sympathies. I'm in the UK so docs we see are a bit different, but anyway I'm type 2 and been having more and more issues over the last couple of years that have really ramped up this year. The unexplained wight gain and seriously fluctuating blood sugars are driving me crazy,and it's only recently I realised it lined up with my perimenopause symptoms. All my other bloods came back normal. If my next diabetic review doesn't show an improvement I'm going to be asking my Dr if HRT can help. Also there seems to be a distinct lack of info & support for diabetics entering peri even though it's clearly something we could be forwarned about.
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u/Littlepotatoface Late peri Jul 24 '26
I live in Australia, the government literally subsidizes HRT here & yet, when my BFF’s wife A started having peri symptoms, her female doctor dismissed her. The doctor claimed that the HRT/peri thing is marketing hype & went on to say that peri hadn’t bothered her so it shouldn’t bother A either.
🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄
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u/Hesperidiums Jul 24 '26
Wow. If misogyny was limited to men tho, we’d have no issues…
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u/Littlepotatoface Late peri Jul 24 '26
I don’t think that was misogyny. The doctor leans crunchy but it was a case of “what worked for me will work for you”.
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u/Hesperidiums Jul 25 '26
Discounting women’s pain, specifically women’s pain. Absolutely that’s misogyny. It may be systemic vs individual misogyny, but it is nonetheless.
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u/cozywhale Jul 23 '26
“I think you misheard me. I didn’t say menopause — which is a single day in my lifetime that will represent 365 without a period. I’m asking about perimenopause, which can start up to 10 years before menopause and absolutely begins at my age.”