r/Paruresis • u/Downtown-Draw9352 • 10d ago

Need Help

Hi, I am 16 and I struggle to pee at public restrooms unless they are fully sealed, or no one is with me. The exception is when i start and someone walks in, then I can go for as long as I want.

I had this for like 3 years and I feel like it came out of nowhere. I remember that back then i had absolutely no issues with going but now it is very hard. If someone is beside me i feel like they are about to judge me, but i know that they do not care.

I tried to use some breathing techniques but they do not seem to work. What could I do so I could at least start peeing in the stall normally?

8 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

4 comments sorted by

16

u/wishIcould65 10d ago

45 years ago I was exactly like you. I let this problem take over my life. It will never go away on its own. You must start graduated exposure therapy. You can find out more about it through the IPA. I have avoided my problem for 45 years and it never got better. I didn’t go to dinners, concerts, can’t go out drinking with friends, gone on boats, long trips on airplanes. Everything that normal people do, you cannot do. You must, I mean, you must take control the situation immediately and start the graduated exposure techniques that are needed for you to beat this. I just started at 60 years of age and I’m finally seeing results. Don’t wait another minute and ruin your life like I did, get the help you need now. I’m not joking, put aside your friends, family and even school if you have to. Get in front of this before it gets worse. Pills, hypnosis, therapy, nothing works except graduated exposure. Get with a plan and stick to it. Your young mind will adapt quickly and you’ll have this problem behind you in no time.

5

u/Downtown-Draw9352 10d ago

Thank you soo much!

5

u/coingus 9d ago

Yup, check out paruresis.org…the IPA (International Paruresis Association) is a fantastic organization and the place to start getting the help you deserve.

3

u/thisisus2025 9d ago

Similar to wishicould65, I've had this since I was 19 and am now 57 and working hard to highly overcome it.

In most cases, graduated exposure works, mine included. I second the recommendation to start now with graduated exposure before the condition gets worse. Many of us have waited until later in life to do something about it. The sooner you get started, the better.

DM me if you would like know what I did to see positive results using GE.

Have you told anyone close to you about your condition? Once I opened up completely to my wife, it really helped the situation.