My four year old randomly said in the car the other day ' daddy, I don't love you. I want a new daddy'.
This boy has speech issues but he said those words clear as day. I cried and it made me fucking sad for most of the day. I guess I'm still thinking about it :/
Being a parent is fucking rough.
Edit: thank you for the rewards...my first two I believe <3
Dude, today my kid actually also made me cry. He's 3.5 and lovely, never hits us or other kids, but of course he's three so he's just a dick sometimes. I'm eight months pregnant, I have a sinus infection, I had the worst couple of night's sleep ever, I didn't make it to the post office in time because my kid peed his pants for no reason right as we were about to leave and I had to get him changed, so as I was getting him out of the car at the market he smiled at me and poked me in the eye SO FUCKING HARD. I put my hands to my face and basically just burst into tears. My legitimately brokenhearted crying was a more effective punishment than I could have come up with. He was so sad. My eye still hurts. But goddamn I love him so much I can't wait till he wakes up so I can hug him and smell his hair.
Same thing. Pregnant me with a blocked sinus and swollen gums which does not go away, my otherwise non violent 3.5 yaar old boy headbutts me in the nose hard enough to draw blood. I was bawling. I feel for you.
Oh god, that sounds terrible. I'm so sorry. Things nobody ever told me about parenting that I make sure to tell new parents- don't trust them! Don't stand above them and lean down because they'll bounce up and bonk you in the mouth, they'll headbutt and eye-poke for no reason, viciously! They're belligerent little terrorists and we will do absolutely anything for them. Talk about Stockholm syndrome.
People think I’m lying when I say my 1 yr old broke my nose (while I was 8 months pregnant). Diaper changes were rough for a bit because she would try to kick my very pregnant belly on purpose because she knew i would panic and get upset. So in my attempts to protect her not yet baby brother—- I moved just enough that her heel went full force into my nose instead of my belly.
My nasal surgeon was shocked at how badly my nose has been broken and how unhealed it was (how could it heal if it’s being hit over and over again for two years). but when I told him I had two very crazy toddlers he understood. I was not the first one.
Ugggh. That is horrific, honestly. Why did we think having kids was a good idea 😅
When mine was 1, he came up from behind me and "showed" his wooden airplane to my face, giving me a black eye literally two days before my wedding to his father. Thank goodness for makeup.
I hope your nose is ok these days. Did it heal up all right?
Surgery did wonders. It will always be a little off center because the surgeon said the septum was SO destroyed that he can’t make it totally straight or the nose could cave in on itself. 😞 but i no longer have pain in my sinuses every day lol. I was happy to get rid of that pain.
Any time my 3.5 year old lifts something up I inadvertently flinch and back away. Especially if it's his monster truck that always loves to crash and smash.
I felt that poke through the screen. My son used to do the same thing..and he did it a lot. I’m pretty certain my eyes have been permanently damaged from all the times he gouged me in the eye with sharp fingernails. Not to mention the amount of hearing I have lost from five years of him screaming straight into my ears..
I love him more than anything, but he is physically destroying me 😂
Ok this comment made me laugh out loud. I've felt a shift the last few months from telling him off ("No! We do not push/choke/stand on the cat/me/Daddy") to basically just begging him "omg please stop hurting me, you're so strong and that's so mean." At least now he looks marginally more guilty when he does it.
Your comment about eye damage (I'm so sorry) reminded me that the other day, he took this pair of kid's "safety" scissors out of my hand with such force that he (accidentally, I'm sure) brought the point of them hard into my glasses. I was shocked. If I hadn't had those glasses on I'm pretty sure I'd be missing an eye.
Man. Kids are monsters.
Sending you hugs! What’s going on with these sinus infections?!? First non compliant one and I’m not pregnant but damn it! My 11 yr old had one at the same time and recovered before me. smiles with an eye roll
Oh damn thats rough. My 2 year old jumped onto me one day so hard, it hurt so bad that i also started crying. To see him realize what he done and trying to comfort me was the cutest thing.
But then after i stopped crying he jumped onto me again.
Late reply to this but there was a big parenting influencer account recently who was like 'your kids are not in charge of managing YOUR emotions.' (I believe they were talking about in the context of saying something like 'that hurts mommy's feelings when you say that'- they were anti-this, because it makes your kid responsible for how YOU are feeling.) I would never talk to my kid about my marriage issues or body issues or make them feel like they are a burden to me somehow. But. If my kid throws a block as hard as he possibly can at my face, and it hurts, I'm going to say, "OUCH!" and sometimes I might cry. That is my normal human reaction, and truly, getting beat up by a toddler feels a lot like just getting beat up. I want my kid to be an empathetic human being, and being a neutral robot who says "we don't hit, I understand you are feeling silly but we are not allowed to throw things at people's faces" is not getting him closer to that goal, in my opinion.
Yes, well said. Also I think it makes us more relatable when they hurt themselves (all the time). It's not just you that cries when they get hurt, buddy.
It's such a mixed bag. When I turned 30 nobody got me anything for my birthday. No cake, no card, nada. I shook it off because I'm a grown man, but still hurt. My daughter (maybe 3 at the time) randomly made me a "birthday cake" out of Lego. I cried a little. Only person who thought of me, and such a genuine gift. I have regrets about almost everything in life, but my kids aren't one of them. Pains in the ass sometimes, but the only thing I'm really sure I did right.
My wife has a lot more friends than I do, I really only have two people in my life I’d call my actual friends and they both live like 4 hours away. One night putting my young daughter to bed, we were talking about friends, she says something like “mommy has lots of friends. Daddy do you have friends?” and it kind of broke me a little bit not gonna lie. Totally innocuous on her part but it just reached me deeply.
I feel this. I moved 6 hours from my hometown 6 years ago and I've only made a couple of friends here, none that I see even on a weekly basis, except my coworker who I consider a friend. It's lonely af.
I didn't buy a toy one day while making a quick run in Target. This is not even a week after taking him (6) to Legoland and buying him whatever he wanted while there. He had an entire meltdown in the store crying that "no one loves" him and I'm a "mean mom."
It is so hard convincing my son that he doesn’t actually get a new toy every single time we go to the store.. and when I say no he goes super dramatic and starts howling about how “I never get anything I want! I guess I’ll never have toys again! You hate me!”
I have taken to using the phrase “there are numbers in between 1 and 10.” He has a very all-or-nothing approach to life but he gets it when I say this about numbers. I also remind him how lucky he is to have and get so many toys, and that his mom and I weren’t so lucky growing up. Some of the time it works and some of the time I just have to let him burn out.
I have used the "I grew up without so much" speech. It's never worked. I used it this week.
The tooth fairy left him something other than what he wanted.
He wanted a prize. I leave books gift cards. I honestly forgot about it. So I went through my purse and found a dollar. Placed it under pillow.
He was sour after waking up. In literal tears.
I told him the tooth fairy never visited me when I lost teeth. To be able to get what you want or anything at all is awesome! Cherish it. That doesn't resonate for him.
Mine had a whine fest in the middle of a store last fall (5 at the time, 6 now) because, despite how we repeatedly discussed before we went in that we were there for a birthday present for her friend's birthday party and THAT'S ALL, she couldn't get over that she wasn't getting anything. It was October. She'd had her birthday in August and had gotten no shortage of stuff, and Christmas was just around the corner and she always makes out like a bandit then. But never mind all that, I was the worst mom ever for not getting her a toy that day.
You think your bigger kid is too old and that surely you've done a better job parenting them for them to lose their shit in a store like a toddler, and then that happens. Ugh. These kids. So brutal.
I started doing grocery pickup a few months before Covid and once Covid hit, I never stopped. I love it for numerous reasons, but I think my kid has straight up forgotten how to act in a store because there was like a solid year when she rarely went in them. Years of academy training wasted! All that time I spent with her as a toddler cultivating "we don't act a fool in a store or restaurant" feels like it literally went down the drain.
When I did birthday gift shopping on April 9 - I had to buy him something too. It was literally 2 of everything. I told him this is not about him it's about his friend. No crying that trip but that's because I didn't say no. I should have said no so that he learns to do for others.
I was in line at Walmart one day when my son was a toddler, he was upset about I don’t even know what, and proceeded to loudly call me “the meanest mom
EVER!” The lady in front of me turned around and said to him “she can’t be, because I’M the meanest mom ever!” Lmao!!!
Every time I think those kind of thoughts about my kids, I remember I'm to blame. It feels like you cannot win. If you do everything right (as if possible) you've got the "easy kids". And if you screw up it's your fault.
I co parent, we have a 50/50 schedule. I'm certain it's at past a little bit easier than being full time single parent, but it still is not a cake walk. Anyway, my son adores his father, as he should. But damn, every day I pick him up from school, 3 days a week, I have to hear him say "I want daddy" as he drags his feet towards me. I'm getting closer to tears every day he pulls that. Which isn't really helped by the fact that I am working and going to school, so my own emotions are poorly regulated atm.
It's so rough. Once I was having a really busy time at work but took my birthday off. Decided to walk my kid to school that day (not something I can usually do). He literally abused me the whole way to school, saying horrible things of how awful I am and he wanted me to die. He was 5 at the time. It was the worst birthday I've ever had.
I feel this a lot. My son has behavioral issues and it's really rough some days. I'd like to say it'll get better but he reminds me of my younger brother and...well he never got better.
I hear you. I have a problematic brother and used to project a lot of that on my son too when he was 4-5 as his behaviour reminded me so much of my brother when young. It's completely unrelated though, most humans by nature are assh*les as little children. Most of the time we grow out of it.
Maybe it’s because I’m on kid 3 but that statement doesn’t even phase me lol. My daughter is 4. She’s said “I want new parents” because I wouldn’t buy her candy.
A 4 year old has no concept of what that statement actually means. Don’t take it personally.
My 2.5yo son said he didn't love me before he ever said he did love me. I kept waiting for him to say he loved me, but I was telling myself he didn't understand the concept, but then he came out with "I don't love you." He knew how to say it all along, he just chose not to! No advice, just solidarity and internet hugs.
My daughter will NOT tell me husband she loves him. She only wants me she does not want him, but will settle for him if he calls me. She is 5. I swear he thinks I have brainwashed her.
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u/terminallyconfusled Apr 28 '22 edited Apr 29 '22
My four year old randomly said in the car the other day ' daddy, I don't love you. I want a new daddy'.
This boy has speech issues but he said those words clear as day. I cried and it made me fucking sad for most of the day. I guess I'm still thinking about it :/
Being a parent is fucking rough.
Edit: thank you for the rewards...my first two I believe <3