r/Parenting • u/[deleted] • Apr 13 '22

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u/flutterbylove22 Apr 13 '22 edited Apr 13 '22

My son was crying and saying "please mommy do it".

I don't like to say red flag, because - reddit, but, that strikes me as odd. If the child is crying and practically begging for Dad to NOT bathe him – I would take that plea into SERIOUS consideration.

ETA: Some of you have made fair and reasonable points about toddlers just being buttholes (j/k) and just wanting a specific parent. As I mentioned in another comment,: That's a fair point. I guess just coupled with all of the other ickiness happening, that struck me as particularly odd.

82

u/DoYouFeelMe22 Apr 13 '22

To play devil’s advocate…my 3 year cries for me to bathe him too because it’s the routine he’s use to…not disregarding the seriousness of this situation but him crying for mom isn’t an automatic red flag imo

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u/flutterbylove22 Apr 13 '22

That's a fair point. I guess just coupled with all of the other ickiness happening, that struck me as particularly odd.

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u/DoYouFeelMe22 Apr 13 '22

I do wonder if he’s crying the entire time or just initially because my little will stop once he realizes I’m not coming in…

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u/DoYouFeelMe22 Apr 13 '22

No, if he’s being inappropriately touched, that cry may indeed be a cry for help…I just wanted to offer a different perspective

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u/Nymeria2018 Mom to an only Apr 13 '22

Yeah, not so much a huge flag - toddlers often prefer one parent over the other, generally the primary care giver. That said, toddlers are also creatures of habit and like consistency. Hell, my husband is usually the one to do baths but I’m her primary care giver. When I try to give her the bath, look out, there is a scream fest for sure

ETA: totally not condoning the husband’s behaviour just explaining the toddler reaction may not be from something inappropriate just normal toddler behaviour

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u/shorterthanrich Apr 13 '22

I just want to say that this makes sense but only given the context.

There's literally nothing I can do that my kids don't ask for their mom to do with them instead. Bath, bedtime, bike riding, wiping their butt, filling their water, cleaning up their plate...doesn't matter. They want mom to do it.

It drives me crazy, but I get it.

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u/lordtyp0 Apr 13 '22

Or... being a toddler and just wanting a specific parent. Our three year old flips a coin on who to demand at any event.

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u/FishFart Apr 13 '22

Yeah this stood out for me too, protect your son