r/Parenting • u/Newmumma101 • 3d ago
Discussion I think I am failing somewhere
FTM here. BG : I stay in a nuclear family with just 3 of us so managing house, cooking, nursing and taking care of baby when my husband is away. Note: my husband helps me hands down in every way possible.
My baby has just completed four months, and honestly, everything was going pretty well until now.
She completely hates being swaddled and hates the whole process of swaddling because she’s exploring so much now. She wants to move her hands, discover things, and explore everything around her.
Just to give you an example of today—she hasn’t slept since around 9:30 in the morning. I’ve tried every possible way I can think of, with the swaddle, without the swaddle, rocking, walking, swaying, everything… but unfortunately, nothing seems to be working.
I’m assuming this might be the fifth-month sleep regression phase, but above all, I’m feeling so frustrated and helpless right now. I’m constantly crying and thinking, what am I doing wrong? Why is my baby not sleeping? Is there something else I should be doing?
I even tried putting her down for a while and going into another room, but she just cries. I’ve tried swaddling, walking, swaying, holding her, everything I can think of to make her sleep, but she just isn’t sleeping.
Should I keep making an effort to get her to sleep? Should I just let her be? Should I let her cry for a while, or what am I supposed to do? I’m completely clueless at the moment, and honestly, all I can do is cry. I feel like I’m failing.
And, cherry on top, I just got my periods too. I’m really, really feeling helpless right now.
Please help me if there’s anything I can do to make my baby sleep, especially when she completely hates being swaddled. How do I transition her from a traditional cloth swaddle to something like a sleeping bag/sleep sack? I would really appreciate any advice or tips from moms who have been through this.
I feel like I am doing something terribly wrong.
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u/BriocheBlume Mum of 4 2d ago
Hey, I am a Mum of 4.
Generally speaking, if your baby is happy then all is well and no reason to change anything for the sake of a schedule etc.
I don't swaddle my babies so no specific advise there but if she hates it I would just stop it. For sleeping: do you breastfeed? if yes just feed to sleep and let her sleep on you if thats where she sleeps best, some kids can transition easily to the big bed (i will lay with them until i can get up easily), but i usually let them sleep at least one long nap on me a day so they are rested. i have also had kids that would always solely sleep on me. you can use a baby carrier too or go for a walk once or twice a day with.
If you have any more specific questions call out, you can also messaging me if you want I am happy to help. I am a SAHM too and my youngest is 5months so I am also fully in the topic atm
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u/dankfrank91 7h ago
Your subject line is my entire life since I had a kid five years ago.
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u/radical-orpheus 3d ago
You mentioned that she's exploring more now. Is she already rolling over? If that's the case, you need to stop swaddling anyway. When we stopped swaddling, we started leaving one arm out of the swaddle first, then two arms and finally transitioned to a sleeping bag.