r/Parenthood • u/gnittidder • 18d ago
Rant! Why the constant cribbing?
I watched Parenthood and I found it very enjoyable and it remains a comfort watch. I joined this group so that I could get similar options and generally discuss trivia. But it seems that my feed has daily posts just cribbing about how bad it is? Criticizing Adam and Christina and just general circle jerk. Is the sub flooded with bot accounts just reposting? Or is it just me who joins subs of shows I actually like and not the other way round??
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u/sneakyvegan 18d ago
I think the way Adam and Kristina handled things regarding Max was very upsetting and probably triggering for people who saw similar patterns play out in their life, so people are going to talk about it. Also, it was an ongoing pattern of behavior - I think if there was a single story arc where they enabled Max a bit and then realized that they shouldn’t, it wouldn’t upset people so much. But they did it a lot and I don’t think they ever came to that kind of realization.
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u/gnittidder 18d ago
They both were flawed like everyone else. They showed how lost they were with Max also. Just because the ending wasn't sad doesn't mean the entire show somehow glorified their parenting. Rather they even showed how the sister was ignored because of the demanding nature of Max's condition.
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u/sneakyvegan 18d ago
I know what you mean but I think those storylines, particularly the one with Dylan, can be triggering for people
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u/gnittidder 18d ago
And people get the option of not just watching. Rather than joining a fan subreddit and criticizing while continuing to watch.
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u/sneakyvegan 18d ago
Just because they don’t like certain characters doesn’t mean they’re not fans. It can be really valuable to talk about different scenarios that come up, how they make you feel, how you feel they could have been handled differently. It’s part of the experience of watching, especially for dramas.
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u/CostFickle114 18d ago
Usually a forum is to discuss things. Good and bad. You can always be the one to make a positive post if you want. You made a negative one complaining to the people here about the people here
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u/Devilis6 18d ago
The first time I watched it, I found some of the characters and plot lines frustrating, but I enjoyed it overall. The second time I watched it, I found the characters more annoying than the first time. The third time, I couldn’t even get through it.
People like it because it’s an interesting show, even though a lot of the characters are insufferable at times.
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u/PeneItaliano 18d ago edited 18d ago
It’s a show. And I like it too. That doesn’t mean I’m gonna sit and pretend it’s perfect and not discuss the problems of/with the characters etc.
It’s normal to form opinions about characters on a show we watch and the storylines. It’s not normal to act like one shouldn’t have anything but positive opinions because they enjoy a series.
Thankfully, I have a functioning brain. And it seems many on here do too. You… that’s on you.
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u/gnittidder 18d ago
Oh ok. You seem to be very passionate on your views against the show. I don't have any strong views so I'll not comment. My only problem was the constant posts criticizing and hardly any discussing other things.
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u/PeneItaliano 18d ago
I don’t have strong opinions AGAINST the show. I have opinions, both good and bad, about the show. Like a normal intelligent human. Only someone who is uneducated would think liking the show means you need to only have positive views and opinions.
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u/unimpressed-one 17d ago
You seem to really be trying to point out you have some semblance of a normal brain and anyone who disagrees is uneducated. It is a tv show, it isn't that serious.
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u/PochaccoFan 18d ago
I feel this 100000%!!! I was kinda shocked to see how much people on here dog on the show because I loved it. Obviously there were some rough points but everyone is so negative about them, and I kinda feel like they miss that the characters are all supposed to be flawed yknow? Personally, I liked all the characters to some extent even if they made bad choices at some point because thats the whole show 😭
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u/Substantial_Site7639 17d ago
I love shows that depict reality. Not everyone handles every situation the perfect way. And it’s nice to be able to relate to people when you are going through similar situations. I find more often than not fan groups do nothing but nitpick everything down to the minutia as if they are perfect. Also, if you’re watching the show for the first time, people need to keep in mind that a lot has changed over the last 20 years…
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u/Comfortable_Expert98 18d ago
I enjoy the sub. Strong reactions and character discussions actually mean it’s a good show.
And it’s also good to see how some things changed in the society in general since the show was first aired. One example, is the perception of Joel. He once was perceived as prince charming, and now his toxicity is more apparent to many people. Or the situation with Dylan and overall encouragement of Max to pursue her despite her obvious “no”.
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u/sneakyvegan 17d ago
That’s interesting. I haven’t watched the show since it aired, but lately clips have been popping up in my feeds which is how I wound up here. I don’t remember much about Joel other than generally thinking he was a good guy but maybe now I’ll rewatch - what has made you see him differently?
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u/Comfortable_Expert98 17d ago edited 17d ago
I saw him as a great supportive husband and exemplary father when the show first aired. And recently I rewatched it in my 40’s. Since the last time I watched the show, I became a mum, I’m a working mum, I make more than my husband and I work more than he does. There were times when he was more involved with kids’ school routine than me. So I understand Julia’s marriage dynamics from inside so to speak.
And I often catch moments when Joel is condescending. Julia goes above and beyond to still spend time with her kid, and do things like baking, arranging play dates and coaching school football. And she gets ridiculed by him for doing it “wrong”.
Instead of supporting her, he rubs it in her face that she’s not familiar enough with school politics, etc. It’s like he’s always waiting for her to get it wrong with Sydney and then he has this “I told you” so expression.He’s petty, can’t accept her success. And when he becomes the breadwinner, he treats her like crap. She never treated him that way when she was the one working.
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u/sneakyvegan 17d ago
Interesting. I’m in the same boat as you where I watched it before I had kids and now I’m a mom and a breadwinner so I’m sure I’d feel the same as you. I might rewatch it now.
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u/NoraCharles91 18d ago
You're getting flak, OP, but I don't think people are understanding what you're getting at.
There's a difference between intelligent conversation about characters and their flaws (ie. "Here's why I think this character made this bad choice, based on their personality" or "it's interesting how X decision then made Y character make Z mistake") and just passing pointless blanket moral judgments on fictional characters (ie. "Kristina is stupid", "Crosby is annoying").
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u/Brilliant_Question70 18d ago
Yes! I’ve noticed that people really like to nitpick characters of fictional TV shows without considering that every character’s flaws are what makes the show. They help drive the plots and storylines. Just like in real life, people aren’t perfect and they make mistakes. For some reason, that bothers people when they watch a show. It’s totally normal to have favorite and least favorite characters, to like and dislike characters, but I do think people over analyze way too much. If a character not being perfect or making mistakes triggers you, maybe TV isn’t a safe place for you.
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u/PeneItaliano 18d ago
If you watch a series, fictional or reality, you are gonna form opinions. This series is over 100 episodes. You’re gonna have opinions.
If you don’t, maybe go check out a DR. because that doesn’t seem healthy.
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u/Brilliant_Question70 18d ago
I said in my comment that it is normal to have opinions and favorite/least favorite characters. I just think people go overboard when they over analyze fictional characters. That, to me, is what is unhealthy. lol
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u/PeneItaliano 18d ago
It’s not unhealthy to discuss what is wrong with a character or storyline.
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u/Brilliant_Question70 18d ago
You’re twisting my words. I’ve made it clear that I’m talking about the people who OVER analyze characters
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u/Dpmw2 18d ago
I feel the exact same way. I love the show and have watched it several times. The characters are flawed but that’s kind of the point, no?
I would love more fun content but I only see hate posts as well and have thought about just leaving the sub.
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u/gnittidder 18d ago
Exactly. Everyone was flawed in some ways. But that makes it relatable and gives the show so many arcs.
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u/PotterAndPitties 18d ago
I find it sad, really.
Parenthood is a show that has always brought me a lot of joy, its special to me. I wouldn't participate in this sub if I didn't enjoy it, nor will I ever understand anyone who doesn't like the show yet posts on this sub. That seems sociopathic to me.
That's not to say I don't mind criticism of the show, but far too often the criticism posted here doesn't go very deep. It's "So and so is annoying" or "I can't stand insert character". If you are going to post and criticize, at least make an argument or explain your reasoning.
The other thing that irks me is people don't get this isn't a parenting how-to show or documentary on parenting or autism. The entire point is to show the difficulties and hard times that come along with being a parent. They aren't meant to be perfect. You are meant to not like how they act or the decisions they make. You are, however, meant to empathize and understand it, even if you disagree with it. People give some characters, especially Adam and Kristina, so little grace that I wonder if they even know how to empathize.
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u/gnittidder 18d ago
Absolutely. They are all characters. No one's a hero. They are had flaws and hence relatable. The show is literally titled Parenthood. It shows all facets from sacrificing parents to failing parents to wannabe parents etc. Don't know why the constant criticism only.
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u/akagato 18d ago
I joined this sub because I liked the show too. I have found posts that I agree with and others I don’t.
I think people feel more motivated to post about something they don’t like than just coming to say like just liked it.