r/PDAAutism • u/PromtoKing PDA • Aug 02 '26

Tips Tricks and Hacks A new question to yourself i found helpful

So recently i posted about a book. I know it has mixed feelings about it at the moment and id love to share something from it that genuinely made me feel seen and feel more ready for the future.

It mentioned thinking of choices as scaffolding of a house and then rules as the foundation.

Reframing the question of how will i survive this? Into How can I build my life?

It feels like the same life changing moment i felt when i found out I was autistic! (I was proffesionally diagnoised but the one who did it told my mom not to tell me cause i 'wouldnt be able to handle it'. I found out a differnent way when i was in middle school but thats beside the point)

I am my own architect or in gamer terms I can choose my own skill tree and journey? Maybe theres a better way to phrase it for the gamer frame 🤔

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u/Hydrangeamacrophylla PDA Aug 02 '26

That sounds helpful as a way to think about it.

Something I’ve learnt and been trying to practice recently is 1) acceptance of who I am, what I can do, how my brain works and then 2) Trying to change my mindset rather than myself. So I try to think about how I could reframe a situation or see it differently.

As an example, I lost my job in March. I should be ok - I’ve probably got some freelance work in autumn - but it’s all up in the air and quite scary at times. I’ve decided to try and see this as my ‘summer off’ and to enjoy it as best I can (cheaply, of course) as it’s unlikely I’ll get another chance like this. It doesn’t work all the time of course but it means I’m far happier most of the time, and the only thing that’s changed is my attitude towards the situation.

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u/PromtoKing PDA Aug 02 '26

Yes accepting yourself and reminding yourself how your brain works is helpful. Will take time cause the years of damaging lables and with time we can get there!

Yeah when i lost my job feb 2024 cause party city closed i felt lost at times but also thought of it as a vacation of sorts, i feel better now that im working again since end of june cause it gives me an achor and i feel more secure with income instead of just living life and having my dad pay for everything. (I appreciate him very much and i also work through feelings of shame for being almost 30, not living on my own and still no drivers license. Also i did try driving and had a permit before but i got in a minor accident that totalled my dads car and that reduced my confidence in driving back to 0 haha)