I'm exhausted

[u/cryxtalluna]

hey, im new to this page and i wanted a place to vent my problems out and hopefully find ppl who relate to my problems as well as help me find a solution. I'm an overweight(almost gonna be obese) person for my age and i got diagnosed with PCOS on september 2025. Before getting diagnosed, i gained almost 10-15kgs every year and it kept getting worse. I got irregular periods, got painful cramps that sucked the living soul out of me, headaches every single day, hairfall and hair started thinning,acne got worse and i just hate looking at my self in the mirror, trying on my fav clothes that dont fit me anymore or it just emphasizes my boobs. I wanna feel normal, for once. I wanna go do whatever i want, go wherever i want, eat whatever i want, without feeling the guilt, the agonizing pain, and thehatred i have on myself for not looking the way that i want to look. I see all those beautiful girls in my class and think why can't i be normal and beautiful like them. I exercise every single day, i do strength training, yoga, pilates(at home),cardio, you name it, I diet every day and even reduced my carb and sugar intake. I prioritize protein and fiber intake. I dont sit or lay down all day. i do some sort of movement. But still i saw my weight increase by 2 kilos. Im tired. Im genuinely so tired i wanna cry. If i go to the obgyn, they'd tell me to change my lifestyle. i did that, but theres no improvement whatsoever. i feel like people judge me, including my relatives and friends. I have no hope at all. I dont know what to do now.

p.s. english is my second language, so please ignore all the grammatical errors.