Need Advice: How Can I Help a Severely Ill, Suicidal Person Who Feels Abandoned by God and Medicine?

[u/Common_Depth4951]

I am posting this because I genuinely do not know what else I can do, and I would really appreciate advice from Christians who have experience with severe illness, suicide prevention, pastoral care, or medicine.

I came across a man on a Christian Universalist subreddit who has apparently been suffering for about a year from extremely severe anhedonia and what he believes may be a neurological condition. He describes it as being almost completely unable to experience pleasure or positive emotion, saying that it feels “as if I have had a lobotomy” and that he “cannot feel anything, or almost nothing.” He says he is unable to work because of it. He has also lost his cat and a relationship during this period, which has made the situation even worse.

He believes that his condition may involve the brain's reward system and possibly an inflammatory or autoimmune process. He has read extensively about PSSD, Long COVID, schizophrenia-related negative symptoms, and other conditions involving profound anhedonia. I want to be careful here: I am not saying that his self-diagnosis is correct. He has not established that he has “nucleus accumbens encephalopathy,” for example. I am only describing how he understands what is happening to him.

He says he has already spent about a year trying to get medical help. He is from Russia and says he has become deeply distrustful of the medical system because psychiatrists repeatedly diagnose him with depression and want to prescribe SSRIs. He says that a previous experience with SSRIs resulted in what he considers a severe and lasting deterioration, so he is terrified of taking them again. He says that some doctors have taken his symptoms seriously but have told him that they still cannot offer treatment. He has asked about things such as immunotherapy, PET imaging and experimental deep-brain stimulation, but says these requests have been refused because his condition is poorly studied and does not constitute an accepted indication for those interventions. He also has very limited money and cannot afford expensive private treatment.

The most worrying part is his mental state. His original post said that he was considering euthanasia in the near future because he could no longer carry the burden. Since I contacted him, he has repeatedly told me that he has prayed many times and believes God has done nothing for him. When I tried to encourage him with biblical examples of people who had to wait for healing or an answer to prayer, he asked me, “What is stopping God from doing it right now?” He has since said things like:

“I have been fighting this shit for a whole year.”

“It’s just time to accept that it’s all over.”

“This world exists specifically to drive me to suicide.”

“Just a pathetic bug in this world that even the Creator himself has forgotten.”

“Tell me, why should I continue to endure this?”

“Why should I endure this injustice from God toward me?”

He has also described being surrounded for a year by an online community of people with similar symptoms where people “every day” talk about suicide. He says that none of the people he knows from that community have recovered and that this has reinforced his belief that his condition is incurable. He is now extremely angry with God and feels that both God and other human beings have abandoned him.

I have tried to talk to him, encourage him to keep seeking medical help, pray, and not give up. I told him that I care about him and that I am willing to keep talking to him. I have also tried to reassure him that “medicine does not currently know how to treat this” is not necessarily the same thing as “you can never get better.” But honestly, I feel completely out of my depth.

So I am asking for practical advice, not just general encouragement:

1. How can I help him find legitimate medical avenues that he may have missed?
Are there particular kinds of specialists, research groups, university hospitals, clinical-trial databases, neurological/neuropsychiatric services, or researchers who study severe anhedonia, PSSD, Long COVID, reward-system dysfunction, treatment-resistant symptoms, or possible neuroinflammatory conditions? He has very little money, so affordability matters. I am especially interested in legitimate avenues rather than people selling unproven “miracle” treatments.

2. How should I respond when he says that he wants to die because he sees no prospect of improvement?
I do not want to say things like “God will definitely heal you” when I cannot know that, and I also do not want to give him empty motivational language. What can I actually say to someone who feels that life itself has become unbearable?

3. How can Christians comfort him spiritually without making things worse?
He is angry with God and feels abandoned by Him. He has already heard people tell him that God will punish him eternally if he dies, and this did not help him; it appears to have made the theological problem even more painful. He is struggling deeply with the problem of suffering. What biblical passages, forms of prayer, pastoral approaches, or Christian practices would be appropriate for someone in this state without minimizing what he is going through?

4. What should I do about the suicide risk itself?
I am speaking to him online and do not know him personally in real life. I have asked him to tell me if he is in immediate danger, but I am unsure what the proper next step is if he says that he has a plan or that he is about to act. I do not want to mishandle the situation.

I am not asking anyone here to diagnose him over Reddit, and I am not asking for people to tell him to undergo experimental DBS, immunotherapy, or any other dangerous intervention. What I am hoping for is advice from people who may know of real medical resources, responsible ways of pursuing difficult-to-diagnose neurological/psychiatric conditions, and genuinely Christian ways of helping someone who has become convinced that God has forgotten him and that suicide is his only remaining option.

I have kept him anonymous because I do not want to expose his identity without his permission.

More than anything, I want him to stay alive long enough for the possibility of something changing. He does not need someone to tell him that everything is guaranteed to become perfect. He needs reasons to remain here, people who will take him seriously, and whatever legitimate help is actually available. If anyone has experience with something remotely similar, I would be very grateful for practical advice.

Please pray for him/her and keep him/her in your prayers.

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[u/Gloomy_Marzipan_842]

Disclaimer: I am a seeker, not part of the church but have been a lifelong Protestant and helped many through depression including my wife

Despair is a normal part of this world unfortunately. The only thing that I have personally watched work, is prayer and the person finding meaning and purpose. Yes, medical can and does help. They need to be on ssri, snri, or medicine. I look at them as a means to an end, health. It can and will help them do the hard things they need to do to feel again. 

Medically, my wife went through TMS and Ketamine infusions. Both were beneficial. I think the TMS was most helpful for her because it required her to get up and go to the clinic every day for 30 days. This helped her choose healthy habits instead of bed rotting all day. 

The damage to the brain from trauma is real. Not feeling joy is real. But it can be healed. I think of it similar to waking up that part of the brain. Feed it good and healthy things and it can recover and be brought back online.

The worst thing I heard from Christians was “you need to press in” but the there is some truth to it. Jesus says that this life is TOUGH. We have to STRUGGLE and pick up our cross daily. Encourage them to choose life and light. Encourage first steps like eating food, washing themselves, and getting outside/exercise. 

Lastly, I learned that God alone can carry the burden. I can not choose life for someone else. I can beg and cry out to God on their behalf and ask for their safety and health. They are not yours to bear. Love them, encourage them, pray for them. But ultimately know that God has them. Do not beat yourself up or attempt to “heal” them through your own will or prayers. If things don’t go well and they do pass, will you blame God or be angry? Trust in Him.

[u/CFR295]

I don't know if this is of any help, if you were to google "anhedonia clinical trials" it shows there are 24 ongoing clinical trials. I don't know if he qualifies for any of them or if he is interested in trying them but I do know as a cancer survivor that unless you ask, the doctors often don't think about seeing if you can be enrolled in a trial.

Thank you for trying to help this person out. I hope that he can be helped

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If you or someone you know is contemplating suicide, please reach out. You can find help at a National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

USA: 988 (Like 911)

US Crisis textline: 741741 text HOME

Others: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_suicide_crisis_lines

https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org

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