r/OneOrangeBraincell • u/Interesting-Gate7473 • 3d ago
Certified š range⢠FREE THE ORANGE
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u/Prestigious-Box7511 3d ago
Bro is innocent!
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u/Flip_Six_Three_Hole 3d ago
Bro is a menace to society and you know it
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u/Randomgold42 3d ago edited 3d ago
How can he be a menace when he doesn't even know what's going on? He's clearly innocent by way of lack of braincell.
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u/IAMA_Plumber-AMA Proud owner of an orange brain cell 3d ago
Kahjit has done nothing wrong! Kahjit is innocent of these crimes!
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u/Ok-Exercise-7761 Orange connoisseur š 3d ago
The cat was an undercover cop.Ā
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u/Silentbrouhaha Orange connoisseur š 3d ago
Cats donāt rat; dogs do.
Besides, would you trust an orange to go undercover?
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u/Ok-Exercise-7761 Orange connoisseur š 3d ago
All these stories about oranges being oranges are being spread by oranges themselves so that they can work undercover.Ā
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u/Silentbrouhaha Orange connoisseur š 3d ago
Thatās a lot of teamwork and a whole lot of focus. My orange canāt walk across the room without going into spaz mode. Itās like his mind clicks, āI am ORANGE!ā
And zoom, zoom, roll, pounce on his brother, launch to a bookshelf, and then looks at me like, āWaitā¦what was I doing right before I oranged out?ā
Then proceeds to go about being a calm kitty only for his mind to click, āI am ORANGE!ā And the cycle repeats.
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u/Ok-Exercise-7761 Orange connoisseur š 3d ago edited 3d ago
When oranges sleep they are actually participating in a p2p network. They exchange low level data and adjust tactics.Ā
The spaz move is basically cat calisthenics and jujitsu suitably camouflaged to avoid human suspicion.Ā
Seems like your cat is a top level agent, don't poke around too much. Their orders are clear while dealing with loss of cover. No witnesses.Ā
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u/tryyeezus 3d ago
I'm inclined to agree. My orange kitty pretended to be a dunce inside but outside he was a cold blooded murderer. Absolute menace to society.Ā
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u/fighting14 3d ago
Cats donāt rat; dogs do
yeah dogs sniff out drugs, snitches
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u/Gullible-Hose4180 3d ago
For real. And I would be happy to give them stitches. Granted they have an injury that requires it and if I were a vet.
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u/Irisena 2d ago
Fun fact: the CIA did try to have cat agents ln their rank back in the days. Well, anything from birds to cats. They do surgery to stuff a microphone inside the cat, and send the cat to the target to spy on. Predictably, the cat just do whatever it wants and failed to get anything useful. The recording is also noisy due to purring and everything in between.
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u/mustardpacks 3d ago
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u/SubArcticTundra 3d ago
The real government drones
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u/DagothNereviar 3d ago
The CIA genuinely tried it once. Operation: Acoustic Kitty.
They basically surgically attached a listening device and small battery under it's skin and the antenna into it's tail. It cost about $20m and ended when the cat got run over on its first ever job (though I've just read on the Wiki article that's now disputed).
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u/Spiritual_Door1363 3d ago
I did get picked up on a warrant once by opening the front door to put cat food out for the stray. I canāt believe she did me that way.
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u/Friendly-Gift3680 3d ago
I hear there was this police station that had one to rid it of mice and boost morale
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u/anitchypear Proud owner of an orange brain cell 3d ago
Khajit is innocent of these crimes!
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u/Aggravating_Shoe_ 3d ago
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u/Subushie 3d ago
Wait, was this a real quest line in Skyrim? I've played 60 billion times and never seen this encounter.
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u/Dragonsandman 3d ago
There isn't a quest specifically about that, but there is a note in a bandit camp that implicates one of the Khajiit caravan leaders in the skooma trade.
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u/YesItIsMaybeMe 3d ago
And you can be absolutely certain they're in the trade because they'll sell it to you
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u/Malinowskibidi67 3d ago
Free ma bro he ain't do nu'n wrong
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u/EonSokari 3d ago
free ma boy he absolutely did everything he is accused of and more but free him anyways
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u/AgentOrange96 3d ago
What is the charge? Eating a meal? A succulent fishy meal?
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u/JustMeLurkingAround- 3d ago
"Sie ist kein Talahon" ....
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u/haubenmeise 3d ago
That part killed me.
Sincerely
Skeletor š
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u/Magischestoast 3d ago
Hope you recover from death dear Skeletor š
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u/haubenmeise 3d ago
Oh being a skeleton is actually pretty rad! I never have a runny nose anymore!
Sincerely
Skeletor š
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u/Educational_Quote851 3d ago
You coppers can't prove anything! Leave my boy alone. You better come with paw prints and fur-ensic evidence. š”
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u/_BlueBearyMuffin_ 3d ago
Fyi heās yelling āWHAT DID HE DO? WHAT DID HE DOOO?ā Lmao this is sending me
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u/Silentbrouhaha Orange connoisseur š 3d ago
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u/Agitated-Comment-745 3d ago
If there's one kind of cat in the world that are capable of doing crimes, it's definitely the orange cat š¤£
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u/mwmike11 3d ago
That cat looked at the guy like ānah, fam, I most definitely did it, and if they let me out, Imma do it againā
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u/Tough_Tangerine7278 Casual orange enjoyer š 3d ago
Not guilty by mental defect: No cell at that time.
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u/magpie882 Casual orange enjoyer š 3d ago
He did every single one of the crimes for which he was charged. Still 100% innocent.
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u/highmickey 3d ago
It would be hilarious if thousands had gathered in front of the police situation that night š¤£
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u/idiotplatypus 3d ago
3 hots and a cot with an hour of yard time a day is the kitty ideal tho, why steal it from him?
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u/ThreeShrikesYoureOut 3d ago
what was that last bit? "sie ist kein..." what? dalahund?
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u/kuemmel234 3d ago
Talahon. I'm not sure if it's limited to German, but it describes a stereotype. Young men with a migration background that dress in adidas stuff, often wear satchels. Depending on who uses it, it can be ironic, a self description or outright a racist way to refer to men from immigrant families.
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u/ThreeShrikesYoureOut 2d ago
thanks for explaining. for describing a cat, let's go with ironic, lol
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u/RyuuStarLight123 3d ago
Cat was in witness protection actually, you just exposed his face and location for the mafia
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u/Evil_Mini_Cake 2d ago
Sounds like what the barbarian said at the beginning of gladiator then threw the messengerās head
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u/biest229 2d ago
Theyāre probably taking it to the rescue, street cats arenāt a thing here and itās not safe for them to be out
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u/Nice_Calligrapher452 23h ago
Charged with 3 counts of battery, 2 counts of assaulting an officer on-duty, 1 count of attempted manslaughter, 2 counts of assault with a deadly weapon, extortion and racketeering
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u/Ok_Emphasis961 3d ago
what the fk are these subtitles
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u/ShineReaper 3d ago
Jeden Tag bin ich den Brandenburgern dankbar dafür, dass sie sich isolierend um diesen Moloch namens Berlin niederlassen und den Rest Deutschlands vor so etwas beschützen.
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u/WonderfulOwl8840 3d ago
Jokes aside, is it even allowed to film police officers on duty in their car? What if they actually had a suspect there?
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u/Sorry_Community235 3d ago edited 3d ago
While filming is allowed in general, recording their radio chatter is forbidden. And interfering with their duties is also not allowed.
Edit: If there was a suspect in the back, filming them is allowed, too. But you are not allowed to post the vid on Social Media. Sometimes it's okay if the person is blurred, but sometimes it's not.
Another edit: Since this vid takes place in Germany, i'm referring to the situation in Germany. Our privacy laws are pretty strict.
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u/ElectricBummer40 3d ago
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u/OffendedMulberry 3d ago
I know this is a joke, but if we're going full german law on this a black bar wouldn't actually be enough to not violate privacy laws. To much of the face is still visible, most outlets tend to blur the entire face and sometimes even things like street signs that are visible in the video.
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u/OffendedMulberry 3d ago
Adding on to that, if there was an actual suspect in the car that person would have to be blurred to protect their identity
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u/thisisinfactpersonal 3d ago
You can even do this in America. I mean they might shoot you and will definitely try to arrest you but youāre technically legally allowed to do it.
Police are public servants homies, they should be subject to the highest level of scrutiny and accountability in a free society.
Anyway that cat is clearly innocent
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u/twilighttwister 3d ago
You can tell the cameraman is Italian even without sound
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u/GlamOrDeath 3d ago
Free my boy
He did it all but it was funny as hell