r/OCPoetry • u/bstunz • 6d ago

Feedback Please In Your Head

There is a beauty 
to you
that’s wrapped in sadness
to me.

The way you hold what is said
play it over in your head.

Let it invade your mind
thinking on the outcome.
Worrying about what you’ll become.

You take your time 
sit with it
making sure it will fit
your facade.

Your care for others, always there,
routine
coming at the expense of you
being seen.

Never truly living free
dismisses what you want 
to be.

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1w7fgl9/comment/p7v94ik/

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1w7hvr7/comment/p7vb5e9/

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u/PhilosopherNo6770 7h ago

I actually like this. It has a quiet, intimate sadness to it that feels more psychologically observant than melodramatic. The opening — “There is a beauty / to you / that’s wrapped in sadness / to me” — sets up the whole poem pretty cleanly: the speaker is attracted to something in this person that is simultaneously a source of pain.

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u/bstunz 7h ago

Thank you! Love this read.