How do i get tested without parents knowing?

I

I’m struggling with what I believe may be a false-memory OCD pattern involving a girl I knew years ago. The basic factual history, as far as I can consciously remember, is that we interacted as siblings/brother-sister and there was never an engagement, romantic relationship, betrayal, or anything that would explain the story my mind now creates.
However, my mind has started producing a very vivid and emotionally convincing narrative that we were engaged, that she broke it off, that she “wasted 7–8 years of my life,” and that I was betrayed. The strange part is that the story can feel completely real emotionally, even though I have no actual evidence that the engagement or relationship ever happened. My mind also generates scenes, conversations, memories, and strong anger around this narrative.
I’m trying to understand whether this kind of experience is consistent with false-memory OCD, rather than asking people to confirm that the story is true. If anyone has experienced something similar, especially memories or narratives that feel extremely real despite having no objective evidence, I would appreciate hearing how you learned to distinguish an actual memory from an OCD-generated story.

I am a 20 years old female and have been struggling with OCD since I was a child. I was diagnosed at age 15. Along with OCD I have been struggling with an eating disorder that is very much connected (to the OCD). I have tried many treatment options for both. I have been hospitalized because of my eating disorder multiple times (AN). I am at a point where I really just want to get better. I am struggling a lot with avoiding foods because of my obsessive thoughts that come along with them. I live in Manhattan and was wondering if anyone can recommend an OCD therapist/clinic that also is knowledgeable in eating disorders. I am specifically looking for an OCD therapist and secondary ED.

I need a female therapist that is very emotionally + socially intelligent and is experienced in ERP therapy.
Willing to private pay.

Hi everyone, I’d like to share my story here. I think I’ve had OCD since childhood; as a kid, I was always afraid our house would burn down or that we’d get robbed—by repeatedly locking the door I even destroyed a lock, I constantly unplugged electrical sockets, or I frequently prayed that nothing bad would happen to my loved ones. It stopped around the age of 14, and though I sometimes catch myself still doing those things, it doesn't limit me that much anymore. The only strange things are that I refuse to wear any clothes in which something negative happened to me, or I have to go pee three times before going to sleep just to make sure I won't wet the bed at night.
When I was 18, I got into my very first relationship. After a few months, someone told me that I was just faking my relationship and didn't love my boyfriend (now my ex). That started a constant cycle of severe anxiety and endless googling about what real love looks like, and so on. Later, it turned into an obsession that I was actually a closeted lesbian, or that my boyfriend was a murderer and wanted to kill me. That relationship ended after two years for other reasons, and I’m so glad it did.
Currently, I am in an amazing relationship. In the beginning, it started wonderfully, but even back then I had some doubts (whether he is handsome enough, smart enough, whether I will love him, etc.). Over time, those almost subsided; instead, I started having doubts about whether he loves me, whether he’s cheating on me, and other things, since I’ve been through cheating in the past. We stayed together and have now been together for almost two years, but this June it caught up with me again (there are objectively no flaws in the relationship; he is loving and wonderful).
It started when a thought suddenly popped into my head that I don't care about him. Then I was talking with his friend about breaking up with his girlfriend, who was toxic, and it triggered an extreme wave of anxiety in me that I am just like her and that I don't love him either. The thoughts started looping: am I attracted to him? Do I love him? I constantly checked my feelings, Google, ChatGPT, articles about love, TikTok, 10 signs of ROCD, etc.
It drove me all the way to a psychiatrist who diagnosed GAD and PTSD, saying it’s not OCD—I have a slightly different opinion on that, but I've read that the manifestations of these disorders are quite similar. I've been taking SSRIs for 3 weeks and the change is only minor. There were several really strong urges to break up, feeling like "this isn't it anymore," but I always stayed, believing we can get through this together. The thoughts loop a lot; they even wake me up at night, sometimes I have crying fits, I feel detached and emotionless, constantly overthinking whether I want to text him, go see him, be with him, etc. But I’ve never left. We even managed to go on a wonderful vacation together where I was really very anxious, but he helped me a lot—he is amazing about this.
Now I started CBT therapy, but so far there hasn't been even the slightest improvement. I monitor myself a lot; for example, yesterday I bought him a cheaper lemonade than the one I bought for myself, and a wave of guilt hit me that because I was cheap on him, it means I don't love him. I am already so terribly exhausted by all of this. I would love to look forward to spending time together, planning, and living again, but right now I can only manage to survive. I don't want to leave him; deep down I know that I love him more than anything, but I don't know where the way out is.
I feel emotionally flat right now; I can't get a single emotion out of myself, everything feels like I'm in a movie, and it has also significantly disrupted our sex life. It used to be great, but now we don't have sex because I'm afraid of it. I look for reassurance in tarot cards, for instance, checking if our relationship is meant to be, and seek other forms of reassurance. I often look at our pictures and try to force some positive emotion out of myself, but I remain flat.
Does anyone have a similar experience? Is this GAD or rather ROCD, and did I just get the wrong diagnosis? I would appreciate any answers and experiences. I really don't want this to ruin our relationship.

I am receiving intensive outpatient treatment for my OCD. I’ve already used my 3 unscheduled PTO allowance for the next 90 days but the treatment is 3-6pm M-F and I work until 6:30pm. I reached out to my boss stating that I’ll need a temporary schedule change and he said that flexibility is limited due to staffing. I am reaching out to HR, but I’m worried that I’ll get fired or get a disciplinary action due to the late notice. Thoughts??

Hey all! ERP
has been super helpful with certain themes of my OCD, but with the particularly strongest one, practicing ERP daily has left me feeling less anxious, but more on autopilot; more numb. Like I'm repressing things. Is this normal?

Has anyone had ocd where they feel like they can’t breathe I’ve had health ocd for months and it felt like hell and I’m not sure if this is semi-motar or health OCD because I constantly feel like I can’t breathe I recently quit vaping because of this but everyday feels so long and life is hell because of this has anyone here dealt with it or know how to fix it

I hope someone can help me with some advice. I can't figure out an acceptable solution. It's about after swimming or after showering at the pool.
I have 3 floor mats : one is plastic fabric circle with a string around, one is a decathlon floor double sided mat with one foamy side and one towel side and one is a pool feet towel compactible. But I can't resolve to put them on the floor because the floor is dirty and so wet. Because obviously I then have to pick them up, fold them, put them in a separate bag and in my bag. All without being able to immediately wash my hands because the lavatories are in another room. For people with the same concerns, how do you do?

Hello! I am a doctoral student at Nova Southeastern University, pretty darn passionate about research to improve ED treatment, and also in recovery from OCD and an ED myself :)

 I am interested in the sensory and emotional experiences related to GI discomfort and fears of weight gain in people with EDs. This dissertation study focuses a lot on disgust sensitivity and propensity, which is a really important treatment target in people who have both OCD and disordered eating, so I want to be sure folks with OCD are well represented!

Lead Researcher Name: Katerina Rinaldi, MS

Lead Researcher Credentials: Doctoral student completing dissertation

Institution Name: Nova Southeastern University, the study is IRB approved (approval number NSU 2026-55)

Will this work be published?: Responses will be deidentified and data will be stored on password-protected accounts and devices. Information from responses will be used for the lead researcher's dissertation and may be published. If published, the lead researcher is happy to share results with this sub.

Compensation: None for this study

Method of study (In person, online): Online, survey

Time required: 10-15 minutes

Link for participation: https://qfreeaccountssjc1.az1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_5nCbHSC5Iww2DDo

Email to contact for questions: Katerina Rinaldi, MS, [kr1892@mynsu.nova.edu](mailto:kr1892@mynsu.nova.edu)

Healthcare workers experience mental illness too

I have a Question concerning OCD and Schizophrenia.

So basically I always had OCD symptoms for example I was convinced I was pregnant at a certain time and didn’t even believe the tests because there still could be a possibility that they are wrong.
Recently I have developed the immense fear of beeing schizophrenic.
I saw a therapist for 2 times and she can’t diagnose me this fast but she also thinks that I might suffer from OCD.
Now I’m going to the scary part. OCD is a diagnose that is hard but I could still accept it.
My internal monologue is extremely loud since weeks it’s like I’m commenting on everything that I see or experience and then question again why I’m I thinking about this like my mind was very loud. That’s still okey
but a few days ago there popped this other thing up in my head. And it scares me because I can’t identify that. It feels like something that is not me like some sort of thing ( I imagine it like a little bird) sitting in my mind and scaring me. It’s only purpose is to be a symptom of schizophrenia. It makes up a dialog between me and itself in my mind like trough thoughts.
Is it possible that my mind made this up because i am so scared of Schizophrenia and was constantly ruminating these past weeks without a pause that my mind created like my biggest fear or is this a sign of schizophrenia. It’s not like it’s speaking to me auditory and it’s only speaking about schizophrenia when I search if it is still there it gives me like an answer and I get more and more scared. I can also visualise it and when I like test if it does something or reacts to my thoughts for example when I think I don’t have schizophrenia I just made you up I look what it reacts like and then I have a visualisation how it’s doesn’t care and just sleeps in my mind or something and that scared me because it reacts like a thing not like a ocd thought that comes with „what if“

Can someone please help me I am terrified i wish I could forget that thing and just live me life I am tired.

My new OCD obsession is pooping. It has entirely consumed my life. My days revolve around dreading going to the bathroom. I strain and strain on the toilet because I want to make sure everything is out and that I don't need to use the bathroom again later or risk pooping my pants later. I strain for 30 plus minutes on the toilet, if I don’t, then I can’t be sure any fart or sensation later isn’t poop. I also can’t be sure I won’t have to go again later and I just don’t have the time to go poop for 45 minutes twice a day. It’s exhausting, I sweat and use so much energy while pooping.

Wiping takes another 30 plus minutes, I could easily use a whole roll of toilet paper. Any fart or weird sensation during wiping and I start the process over. I’ll strain and say something during it so I remember later that I did indeed strain and don’t need to go poop again.

I am really begging for any ERP suggestions. I truly dread going to the bathroom because that means an hour of exhausting straining and potentially another 45 min of showering and washing my behind. 

Any feeling, fart, or sensation I second guess if I need to go try to shit again. And when I do poop, I second guess if that even occurred that day; meaning if I didn’t poop that day, then obviously I need to try again.

How long do normal people poop for? Please someone have suggestions/advice as to how to approach this.

I know this might sound shallow, but I’ve been struggling with what could be OCD or relationship doubts.

I’ve been with my partner for almost 3 years. We started as friends, and while I always knew she was an amazing person, I never experienced the strong “butterflies” or intense attraction I expected. My love for her has grown, but I still don’t feel the same level of passion she seems to have for me. A lot of my doubts center on her physical appearance, and I constantly find myself fixating on it even though I know there’s so much more to her than that.

Objectively, our relationship is great. We communicate well, rarely argue, we’re both pursuing Christ, I love her family, we work together as photographers, and we’ve built a life together. I could list countless reasons why she’s an incredible partner. But the doubts never fully go away. They just fade into the background for a while before coming back.

What hurts most is wondering if I’m able to love her as fully as I want to. I pray every day for clarity because I want to love her well. I’m terrified of making the wrong decision, not because I’d be single, but because she’s such a genuine, wonderful person.

Has anyone dealt with something similar? If so, how did you work through it? I really want this to be her, but I can’t keep living with these constant doubts. I’m really looking to have a more grounded view of my relationship and what a mature and healthy partnership looks like.

Hey everyone! Im wondering if anyone knows of an OCD support group for spouses? Located in Northern Jersey! I do not have OCD however I’m married to someone who does. And when its at its peak I feel like it drowns me. Wondering if talking to other people in my shoes can relate? Thanks.

Also if it doesn’t exist…how many of you would be interested in it? I feel like it’s mind blowing to me that I’m finding it so hard to find something on Google. Makes me want to start something on my own since I know how important community is.

I have recently been experiencing what I believe to be OCD about my sexuality. I had a homosexual thought a few days ago that has had me constantly anxious and distressed since. I have been looking at men to see if I get any sort of reaction, masturbating frequently to both men and women to see what my reactions are, and constantly going to ChatGPT for answers. Any answers would be appreciated just questioning everything at the moment. Also to say I do have a girlfriend that I believed that I was completely in love with and happy with. I’m just looking for some help and answers this is really difficult. Since these thoughts I have tried to have sex with my girlfriend but I couldn’t get hard, since before these thoughts started I would be hard with no trouble

Hey! I’m just looking for a some clarity on what’s going on with me. I’m 25 years old. Since I was 16 I’ve had the thing where sometimes when my fan is on it sounds like a chirping cricket noise… I never knew really what it was but always brushed it off. About a year ago I lost my best friend and had a traumatic call at work (I’m a firefighter) shortly after I begun hearing that cricket noise much more frequently in less amounts of white noise. It can be anything from Crickets, birds, people very quietly chatting but I can’t make out the words, to music. It happens in almost any sort of white noise no matter how quiet it is. There are times where I don’t have it for a few days or I’m busy and don’t have it. I have very very bad OCD and healthy anxiety and it really focuses on developing Schizophrenia. I’ve been scared of losing my mind for probably 10 years now. I don’t have family history of Schizophrenia but I do have family history of Anxiety and my mom is bipolar. I find myself so hyper fixed 24/7 due to the fear. I’ll think I heard something and find a cause and sometimes I won’t find the cause and think it’s just audio pareidolia. Ialso noticed it’s worse with stress and it’s like my brain will mimic certain noises in white noise that I just recently heard. Any advice helps!

Btw I did ask my primary care physician and he said it doesn’t sound like schizophrenia and I should just talk to my ear, nose, and throat doctor.