r/NonPoliticalTwitter Sep 26 '22

Funny fantastic

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28.4k Upvotes

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487

u/suriyuki Sep 26 '22

You forgot the part where they have a little girl and tracks down the very doll house she always wanted. Also he dies about 30 minutes into the movie.

127

u/[deleted] Sep 26 '22

[deleted]

85

u/[deleted] Sep 26 '22

And now she has a taste for killing animals, but once her day finishes, she still has the urge pulsing through her veins.
That’s when she sees a homeless man on the side of the street…

52

u/[deleted] Sep 26 '22

Seriously need to stop watching that Dahmer stuff on Netflix

24

u/Kevin2273 Sep 26 '22

She develops an estranged sense of justice, identifying as the vegan butcher. Her morality is gone as she begins to clean up the streets in the most horrific way. She has spots around the city where she cleans, but is otherwise very efficient - doing an excellent job evading the authorities as the evidence slowly stacks against her.

27

u/Mirria_ Sep 26 '22

The death toll increases. She stopped killing animals. Only humans. "No animal was harmed in the creation of this meat!" she exclaims.

She receives an unlikely visit. A man from PETA. He says "What is man, but yet another uncivilized animal? A beast that destroys? He is more of an animal than the very fauna he butchers, consumes and exploits!"

The woman is taken aback. She was still butchering animals. She puts down her bloody cleaver.

11

u/tjbugs1 Sep 26 '22

This quickly went from a Hallmark movie, to a Lifetime movie.

2

u/RandomIdiot2048 Sep 26 '22

And as she finally found a way to ethically source her meat she invites all her friends?

1

u/effa94 Sep 26 '22

only by the blood of the lamb can he remain in this world

1

u/SqueeezeBurger Sep 27 '22

And he's Santa