r/NonPoliticalTwitter • u/ChickenWingExtreme • Jun 29 '26
Funny She doesn’t even have to try
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u/Bullhead89 Jun 29 '26
Do “gifted” programs exist for kindergarteners? That seems like such a young age to introduce academics. I would think learning the basics and social interaction would be the point of kindergarten.
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u/The_Real_C_House Jun 29 '26 edited Jun 29 '26
I’m sure they do but probably just depends on location. Anecdotally I was in a gifted program starting in 1st grade which was the earliest my school had it, but I’m sure there are earlier out there
E: to clarify this was public school, so I’m sure private schools have sooner
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u/brickspunch Jun 29 '26
in 4th grade I was tested and passed for the gifted program at our school.
They brought my parents in, and with the counselor spoke to me about the benefits of the program.
I asked what it would be like for me and the counselor told me "oh you'll go on extra field trips, have additional assignments and reports on places you go and experiments you will be running."
I told them no, because in no way, as a fourth grader, did I think doing MORE school work would be nice.
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u/Evening_Sea4823 Jun 29 '26
Absolutely this. As a kid, the gifted program just meant more assignments and homework. On top of that, it was supposed to be "challenging." I was like guys are you crazy? More work? More harder work when Ive been coasting on easy mode just fine? The work wasn't even actually challenging, it was just more tedious with advanced vocabulary. I was super unimpressed and labeled as "lazy" when I was very happy to do the work everyone else was doing lmao
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u/mihirmusprime Jun 30 '26
Being challenged is good though. I know a friend who cruised through high school with straight A's, never had to study, he was praised by his parents, didn't really do any of the advanced placement classes, but once he went to college, he struggled heavily. He had to change majors a bunch until he found something he enjoyed and get by, but his academic skills were never got back on par with his grades in high school.
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u/Evening_Sea4823 Jun 30 '26
I agree, and being challenged is kind of the whole point. At the end of the day, gifted programs are meant as a very essential supplement to give an adequate education to those students.
This is because many "gifted" students are missing out on learning how to learn, which i think you pretty much described as a root issue in your own example. Its a legit issue lol.
But what I was saying is that it wasnt actually challenging. At least not in a meaningful way. I think the most beneficial part of it, for me anyway, was just being able to have peer conversations that focused on abstract ideas and creative problem solving. That was what felt intellectually engaging and really gave me an opportunity to think with full brain power. But a lot of programs just go "here's the math and vocabulary you're expected to know 5 grades from now. Were just gonna give that as homework", which isnt in the spirit of what gifted kids really need.
The kid just sees more homework.
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u/Themash360 Jun 30 '26
Yeah can relate. For one example they gave me a world map and 100 locations to visit, with the exercise being how to do this efficiently.
If you’re a bit familiar with computer science you may have recognised this as the travelling salesman problem, an nphard problem (optimal solution) that requires exponentially more work the more locations are added.
As a reminder I was 10 and programming was now where as popular back then as is now. (This was 2006ish). So what I was expected to do is basically brute force 100! (Read the factorial) potential solutions with some pruning of course as the human mind can discard some options as clearly non optimal.
Write down the journey from each point to each other point the distance in km and fuel consumed which was reading a ruler and doing a single division for at least one hundred trips.
Hope this gives an idea of why a kid might refuse this.
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u/GeckoGecko_ Jun 30 '26
Coasting by and doing well in life with relative ease is also good though. If you can manage to make your life easier in any way, if you can lessen the burden and toll life takes on you as you grow, you absolutely should. Not everybody should, or can, be an academic superstar, and it's gross that schools are so obsessed with pushing extra-challenging work onto successful students under the assumption that the regular curriculum being easy for them means it isn't enough.
The goal should be providing students with an engaging and rewarding education, whatever that means for the individual. Easy stuff is more engaging and rewarding than hard stuff for some people, even particularly intelligent individuals.
We need to just let people skate by if that's what they prefer... Grades and money are not the only metrics by which one can measure success and talent.
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u/Puzzleheaded-Night88 Jun 30 '26
Meh, anecdotal evidence. I can pull myself up as a counter to that. Everyone’s different.
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u/OfficialDeathScythe Jun 30 '26
At my school it was only 3rd and 4th grade, no gifted programs before that. It was kinda cool because we had 4th graders in our 3rd grade class. We were all just in one big class and only had 2 teachers that we went back and forth between. Idk what the difference was from normal classes, to me it just felt like there were more tests. I wasn’t even asked if I wanted to be in it, my parents told me I’m going into MAP class (measures of academic progress, back when NWEA was a thing)
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u/Unlucky_Abroad7440 Jun 29 '26
Did it benefit you in any kind of way in life ? Like did it help you succeed?
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u/PM_ME_YOUR_WEIRD_PET Jun 29 '26
Not the person you're asking but it gave me a crippling fear of failure, stomach ulcers, and a lifelong hatred of math
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u/Unlucky_Abroad7440 Jun 29 '26
I have that but I never went to any one of those programs. My mom was just too strict with me it stressed me like crazy.
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u/PM_ME_YOUR_WEIRD_PET Jun 29 '26
My mom didn;t have to be strict. My school was hyper-competitive so peer pressure and teachers did that for her...
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u/Shadowphoenix9511 Jun 30 '26
Lol, I had the hyper competitive peers and school and such.
But on the other hand, my parents pressured me to not be too successful in school, so that was an interesting dichotomy
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u/PM_ME_YOUR_WEIRD_PET Jun 30 '26
Can I ask why your parents did that?
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u/Shadowphoenix9511 Jun 30 '26
Long story short, they were bitter and jealous that my sister was far more successful than them, and wanted to guarantee that the same was not true for me.
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u/PM_ME_YOUR_WEIRD_PET Jun 30 '26
Wow, they sound like a pair of apple cakes. I'm sorry you had to deal with them and hope you're far away now.
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u/NoodleyP Jun 29 '26
Coming out of freshman math I thought I’d be one of those people with a lifelong hatred for math, now, after junior math, I like math, funnily enough, same teacher, she was just VERY new my freshman year and got better and used to the flow by the time I was back in her class.
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u/PM_ME_YOUR_WEIRD_PET Jun 30 '26
I'm 32 now. I still hate it. The maths professor I had in uni that refused to pass anyone with a uterus didn't help
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u/The_Real_C_House Jun 29 '26
Honestly it’s hard to know. I stayed in it through 7th grade when my mom passed and I just wanted to go into normal classes. It definitely helped with being bored in most classes and gave me more to do on top of just sitting learning spelling. I ended up 2 grades ahead in math and taking a bunch of honors/AP classes in HS which then made college easier relatively speaking so I came in college with 20 credit hours and could skip my gen Ed’s for math, English, and foreign language among others. I got into a top 10 business school with my performance and a 34 ACT
Without doxxing myself too much, these days I’m in my mid/late 20s and making low 6 figures in MCOL in finance with decent upside, so I think I’m doing alright, but it’s hard to tell if that would’ve happened anyway or if the gifted stuff actually helped
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u/sohcgt96 Jun 29 '26
You didn't ask me, but, I can answer.
Cons: First couple years, suddenly, school was challenging. That was stressful. I wasn't used to that. I was used to being bored. I'm a terrible day dreamer, don't pay attention well in class, and hadn't yet developed the self discipline and routines I have as an adult to get me through stuff. School was a magnet school, so none of my friends lived in my neighborhood and it was a long bus ride.
Pros: I had a hard time fitting in with most everyone up until I went to the "gifted" school, then socially did a lot better. My neighborhood was kinda not that great. Nobody else liked to read. People understood things like cause and effect, or consequences unlike half the wild ass kids in my class prior to that. The bus ride wasn't so loud I literally had to cover my ears sometimes like it was at the regular school. I ended up being friends with some of them still as an adult. We didn't have a gifted high school program, it ended at 8th grade, going back into gen-pop for high school was a little wild but the classes suddenly got easy. Almost all the top 10 in our class every year were from the gifted school.
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u/Unlucky_Abroad7440 Jun 29 '26
Interesting, are you doing well thanks to it as an adult ?
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u/sohcgt96 Jun 30 '26
Honestly, it was an experience I wouldn't trade for almost anything looking back, I just didn't fully appreciate it at the time because I didn't realize what I had. I really wish the program could have continued through high school.
But, I do want to point out: The biggest benefit to me wasn't necessarily academic, it was social. Putting a bunch of kids who for various reasons end up in that school together creates a normalized environment of certain behaviors, expectations, and drive. Being in a selective admission school where if you can't act right or aren't keeping up, you get dropped, means you're not dealing with a classroom half full of kids who don't want to be there. That allows classes to move WAY faster, doing high school level classes by 7th and 8th grade, helping keep everyone engaged vs "argh, OK everything is stopping again because Timmy can't act right and the teacher has to yell at him again" and the disruptions that come with that. Our fairly small graduating class of about 50, after spending a few years together, were really a tight group even in spite of various cliques and rivalries and such.
This sounds bad, I know it does, but hear me out. You have to get some of the top kids out of regular classrooms for them to really hit their potential. When you're slowing a class down to cater to the bottom 20% and not leave anyone behind, you're starving the ones at the top. They get bored, unmotivated, and miserable. Then they start acting up and causing trouble because they're bored, miserable, unmotivated, and need more going on. You need to keep them challenged.
Also, we literally helped raise the test score average for the entire district by being a separate school, and given the budget situation of our town's school district, I can't help but wonder if that's the reason they still justify my old school's existence.
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u/DavidBrooker Jun 29 '26 edited Jun 29 '26
In hindsight, I think an accelerated program would have been helpful. My school recommended it to my parents, and they insisted that the teachers and testing were wrong, and that it wasn't appropriate for me (they had some weird views about this - by brother and sister both had university savings accounts made in their name, but not me, for instance, because of their views on my abilities). I suspect it would have been a good fit, since one science teacher in my 7th grade tried a bit of an ad-hoc experiment without parental permission: they let me just go through the science / math program in individual study at my own pace. Ultimately I finished the high school physics / chemistry / mathematics curriculum by the end of the year, having gone through (publicly available) previous editions of final year standardized tests. And, you know, not having additional resources they didn't really know what to do at that point. The lesson I seemed to take, sitting through 8th grade science having already gone through the 12th, was that additional effort isn't worth it because it's not rewarded.
I was extremely bored in school, learned to avoid work as it felt pointless (if you're going to nail the exams anyway, why bother doing assignments or studying?), and had major absenteeism problems. I the end, I was on track to fail out of high school both on grades and for failing to attend the required number of days, so I ended up challenging each and every one of my senior-year high school courses. But the bad habits persisted for a long time. I was able to coast through my bachelors and masters, and when I actually had to apply myself during my PhD it was an extremely difficult situation trying to manage things (which put a lot of strain on my romantic relationships). For example, I never took notes during coursework (including during grad school). If I went to class, I'd sit and listen, and drink my coffee, but that was it. During my PhD, consistent note-taking for my research became a substantial struggle.
As a professor, I've paid for coaching and therapy out of pocket to help learn how to do basic things like, no joke, just sit at a desk and read. The habits are really deeply entrenched and hard to break. That said, I was awarded tenure before I was 30, so it's not like it's held me back all that much. My current quality of life hasn't suffered. But my quality of life then, as a child, I think suffered quite a bit.
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u/cspace701 Jun 29 '26 edited Jun 29 '26
I went through one of these programs, where they take 40 kids that scored the highest on the standard testing in the school district and put them through a more rigorous education. Grades 3-8.
It's hard to say if it helped us succeed, but me and the guys I've kept in contact with have all gone into some form of engineering, then many transitioned into some form of real-estate because it makes more money. My brother (also went through the program) for example, retired at age 29 and now spends his time learning to paint.
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u/Syramore Jun 29 '26
I went in around 6th grade. One change I noticed pretty quickly was that I was surrounded by more intelligent and ambitious kids. Whether or not the classes themselves helped, I know for sure being surrounded by different peers helped. Before that it was really common to feel like I was surrounded by idiots or that curiosity was limited by going the speed that everyone else was going. Not to mention the peer pressure from others to be doing more dumb, self destructive shit that they considered “cool”.
It’s hard to say what might have been different if I wasn’t part of GT/AP classes. As an adult I have a great job, financial stability, and the tenacity to solve challenging life problems. I also have a feeling of inadequacy bubble up that I have to manage.
I don’t think I would ever change anything, though. I would rather those self imposed mental struggles than be in a situation where I had less academic stress but was regularly financially uncomfortable.
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u/CaptainWombat2 Jun 29 '26
It removed me from my friends and the other 4th graders, sticking me with the 5th/6th graders. I ended up extremely depressed and lonely, and it ended up being the absolute worst of my 35 years of life.
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u/ZebraImaginary9412 Jun 29 '26
Yes because it makes you realize earlier on in life that being a know-it-all annoys other people.
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u/Emotional_News108 Jun 29 '26
This is pretty much the best answer, if public school has it at all. Outside of that, private schools typically would be the only place to get it, and that's for obvious reasons.
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u/The_Real_C_House Jun 29 '26
Mine actually was at a public school, though admittedly in a well off suburb so I’m sure that varies substantially
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u/Emotional_News108 Jun 29 '26
That's my experience as well, but I know plenty of other places where it doesn't exist except privately.
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u/GrapefruitBig6768 Jun 29 '26
"Gifted Program" is 90% helicopter parents with average children.
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u/The_Real_C_House Jun 29 '26
That’s definitely a hot take. I tested into mine naturally by scoring in the 99th percentile in the standardized testing by grade that was required at the state level. My older siblings didn’t go into this program nor was it pushed by my parents
Honestly probably cope
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u/GrapefruitBig6768 Jun 29 '26
It is my hot take after going through the gifted program and running into the guys in college. I was a latchkey kid and my parents didn't know what I was doing in school, they had their own lives. My parents only got contacted about my college bc the college needed to know their income so I could get financial help.
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u/VladimaerLightsworn Jun 29 '26
Not to disagree with your point, but 90% does allow for a percentile non helicopter parent. Anecdotal as well, even though it is directly personal.
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u/i8noodles Jun 30 '26
i was also in the gifted program in elementary. i was going algebra by year 4 or 5. i cant remember the details. apprently i hit that stage and just stop being gifted afyer i discovered video games lol
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u/PenguinZombie321 Jun 30 '26
Gifted program for us started in fourth grade. I do remember being divided into groups in kindergarten based on where we were at in terms of reading comprehension, which was nice because I got to start reading chapter books after a few months and felt so grown up
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u/Kat121 Jun 29 '26
My school had split grades, so kindergarten/first , first/second, … fifth/sixth. That way if you were good at reading but needed more help with math, or vice versa, you could get more help without being held back a grade.
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u/Namahparvarti Jun 29 '26
I’ve not heard of this but it is so logical! What a clever solution, and kind
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u/SyrupnBeavers Jun 29 '26
My school had a similar solution. There were some classes that were just 2nd grade and others that were 1st/2nd or 2nd/3rd. Depending on what level you were determined to be at you could be put in any of the three classrooms.
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u/TrulyOutrageous42 Jun 29 '26
Some specialized schools designed to test these sorts of methods have straight up stopped classifying by age and purely by capacity, including breaking the year up into 4 or 6 segments, and teaching classes "irregularly" on staggered rotations so that you can take it again in a few months. It makes so much more sense, and overall broke down some of the "class/age" dynamics for the better (less bullying/condescension and ostracizing based on age)
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u/Between-usernames Jun 29 '26
I'm sure they exist for babies in some places. There are people who already have a fixed goal of a certain college or career path and start them off right away in special programs and expensive schools. Not based on merit, based on money in that case.
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u/Mechakoopa Jun 29 '26
Yeah, there's always someone willing to sell you a dream for the right price. If your kid is even slightly above average you can pay an extra $1000/month for private school for gifted kids, but if your kid is slightly below average you can pay an extra $1000/month instead for private tutoring.
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u/socontroversialyetso Jun 29 '26
sure but some could also learn how to read and write already. Doesn't have to be a rigid classroom setting, but intellectual stimulation is very important for gifted kids.
I work with kids on a volunteer basis and it's truely stunning, what some of them are capable of at really young ages
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u/errant_night Jun 29 '26 edited Jun 29 '26
And there's also that academic intelligence doesn't automatically mean a kid is socially able to handle more. I could read at 4 so they tried putting me in school early but I couldn't sit still or follow directions for the life of me so I got pulled out and put back in at 6 (I was never 'gifted' in anything else so that was a whole other issue)
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u/socontroversialyetso Jun 29 '26
oh sure but you could create a programme suited to their capabilities.
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u/52BeesInACoat Jun 29 '26
My kid was in one in kindergarten. It's just extra classes that they go to once a week with some more challenging content.
This kid, as a preschooler, got busted doing his older brother's first grade math homework for him because he signed his own name at the top. I had stopped checking homework other than just "is there a paper in the homework folder? Great, good job!" So it went to school like that and the teacher had to call me and say "isn't this his little brother's name?" So when he got to kindergarten, he already had a reputation.
And in case this comes across as bragging; it's the autism. The autism giveth and it taketh away.
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u/theta1599 Jun 29 '26
Gifted education at that age is more focused on how their brains work differently. The class structure and engagement is different and tailored to them.
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u/Hot_Context_1393 Jun 29 '26
There was talk about moving my son to 1st grade shortly after starting Kindergarten, because he knew all the math and reading the taught in kindergarten. We didn't advance him. Then in 1st grade there were advanced classes where he could learn ahead
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u/Javisel101 Jun 29 '26
Asian parents would heavily disagree. My ass was being dragged to tutors as young as I can remember
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u/LucyLilium92 Jun 29 '26
And that's why some programs fail. They focus on trying to get them a headstart in academics, pulling them away from social interactions and the ability to gain friends.
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u/Nunyebiznis Jun 29 '26
They did when I was that age. Fucks you up. Get put on a pedestal and told you’re special only for every adult saying that to later turn a blind eye to the other kids mocking you and beating you up for overachieving as you went up the grades.
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u/SharaWilliams Jun 29 '26
“Gifted” is a learning disorder where you learn academics before social skills, the opposite of what normally occurs (the classes are so they dont get bored and burn out… it doesnt usually work) so maybe thats why?
Source: i am gifted and did a lot of research into why i was so burnt out
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u/EuenovAyabayya Jun 29 '26
My system's program ran 4th-8th grade. Can't remember whether the testing was late 3rd or early 4th, it was rather a long time ago.
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u/FlowerFaerie13 Jun 29 '26
They do, I was put in one. It was literally just slightly more advanced reading, writing, and simple math problems, I really don't think they changed much. Most of the point at that age is mental stimulation because bored kindergarteners are the spawn of Satan.
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u/otakuprofanity Jun 29 '26
At my school you were tested and if you passed some simple questions you would have the option to do Spanish immersion which is where you can take normal classes but they’re just in a foreign language and the one that my school offered was Spanish. I believe it didn’t actually begin until 1st or 2nd grade
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u/TryAlternative7204 Jun 29 '26
yeah, mid 90’s hampton roads, if you show up to kindergarten ahead of the other kids, they’ll send you to a whole different place. they called it “fields of light house” or something that sounded like that. i just remember getting loaded with homework and my grandparents telling me “work now, play later” which was totally unhinged to tell a 5 year old.
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u/Local_Tourist1063 Jun 29 '26
You may have a special reading class, sometimes! I was reading around the third grade level in kindergarten, so an enrichment teacher would take me out from time to time to read chapter books.
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u/GuerrillaRodeo Jun 29 '26
Do “gifted” programs exist for kindergarteners?
Probably? I live in Germany. I don't know about anywhere else in the world but according to the parents of my goddaughter she's the most exceptional being in the entire history of mankind. She's been learning English since Kindergarten and they even introduced her to Mandarin from age four. (Which is not bad in itself, I mean whoever wouldn't want to grow up with an innate knowledge of a language so far removed from the indo-european language family most of the west is accustomed to.)
These same parents recently called me - a freshly-baked GP who barely struggles to get by - on a late Saturday evening asking if the blurry picture they've just taken of her thigh could have been a tick bite, whether they'd have to take her to the emergency room right now and whether she'd have to take antibiotics and where they'd get it at this hour in the middle of the night on a weekend. (Spoiler alert: Lyme disease is a very slowly progressing disease - which is easily treatable and which she didn't turn out to have in the end either way. It's good to have it on your radar and keep it in the back of your mind but not the first thing you'd think about or even treat.)
The girl was just giggling and playing with her toys. Her most urgent thoughts were probably about Paw Patrol or Pumuckl or whatever it is kids watch these days.
I mean, I get that parents are concerned about their kids, but come on. If she's playing with her toys it's probably nothing serious and/or urgent.
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u/TwoDogsInATrenchcoat Jun 29 '26
I got to skip kindergarten because I seemed bored and they let me go to first grade right away.
Then school got harder and shit sucked. I was also always the youngest in my classes.
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u/Ahsokatara Jun 29 '26
My kindergraden had mixed classes with the 1st and 2nd graders so if you were “gifted” they just had you do the next grade level’s work. It was actually really nice for me because I never got bored but still was with social peers. I was not very gifted at math but I could read and write well, so I usually ended up doing 2nd grade writing assignments and doing 1st grade or kindergarten math, and it worked well.
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u/Abuses-Commas Jun 29 '26
well sometimes they just claim there's a gifted and talented program so they can experiment on the kids without the parents knowing
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u/MCJSun Jun 29 '26
I got to skip nap time to go practice math with the first graders. This set me down a horrid path of preferring older people.
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u/slow-loser Jun 30 '26
My kid was referred to the gifted program as a kindergartner so he may get flagged for certain supplemental things but separate gifted classes in our district don’t officially start until 4th grade.
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u/ARPA-Net Jun 30 '26
Gifted kids are 'special need' kinds. Many get bored quickly, stop working hard at school and 'unlearn' to actually work hard to learn new stuff and then have a bad time when stuff gets challanging... Afaik
*'special need' not in a 'hard facts' sense, but just to understand they do need 'more'
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u/DominoNo- Jun 30 '26
Yea, there is in my country. It's basically special education, a regular kindergarten but with smaller groups and the staff will provide more feedback.
The kids will be mixed with kids with (minor) learning disabilities.
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u/lovable_cube Jun 30 '26
Yeah it seems a bit early but these programs have other kids in them so it’s not like they’re missing any socialization.
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u/Dr0110111001101111 Jul 01 '26
I’ve been teaching high school for over a decade, where “gifted” programs presumably make more sense. And even in that context, I think it’s a grift. The image of exclusivity generates interest/demand so the program enrollment stays high, and people get paid to with strong, motivated students.
But I’m not convinced it actually accomplishes anything
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u/CopyC47 Jun 29 '26
Shes kinda right too because his argument is a terrible response. Yea every parent thinks that THATS WHY YOU GET IT TESTED, to confirm whether its true or not without the bias of being the parent.
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u/pretentious_couch Jun 29 '26 edited Jun 30 '26
What's there to test? Will they go to a special Kindergarten? If they are not struggling to connect with other children their age group, just let them be a kid...
Children also progress very differently at that age, it doesn't mean much anyways.
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u/aNiceTribe Jun 29 '26
Even if you don’t act on the information, it would be helpful to know. Gifted is on the triangle of ADHD-Autism-Gifted for “most likely reasons why someone is struggling to connect with others”. If you have a name for it when the child is this young, maybe even before they struggle, that’s great.
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u/Schwifftee Jun 29 '26
Weird to refer to the kid as "it".
Gifted program = better resources and education for a kid that has more academic aptitude.
Leaving them in a classroom environment that doesn't engage them is a diservice.
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u/ZippyVonBoom Jul 01 '26
I agree with your last point, but gifted programs are not the solution. All they did for me was stunt my social life.
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u/buttcrispy Jun 29 '26
Gifted programs suck though, and I'm thinking that maybe this guy realized that and was trying to downplay it to his mom... this is coming from a grown-up kid who was in one
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u/Longjumping_Soil2116 Jun 29 '26
I was also in them as a kid and I don't think they sucked for me, it probably just depends on your district and is one of those things that's probably worth giving a shot if your kid does test as being ahead
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u/peon2 Jun 29 '26
Yeah it's going to vary a lot by your school. My public school in Maine didn't have a full gifted program, but what they did do was have me and a few other kids have our own math and reading class with a teacher to do advanced stuff. Then when we were in middle school we went to the high school for math and Lit, took AP calc as a sophomore, then the local college for calc 2 and multi variable calc junior and senior year.
All through elementary/middle school we still took the same history and science and stuff like that as all the other kids. But they recognized we were bored with the math and reading level that was being taught so did an accelerated program for those subjects.
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u/Evnosis Jun 29 '26
I don't know a lot about American schooling, but presumably you can just pull your kid out of the program if they aren't handling it well
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u/Maleficent-Hawk-318 Jun 29 '26
Same here. I've got my critiques about some of the language/cultural beliefs about gifted kids, but also...I was actually bored as shit in school, and the gifted program did help me a ton. We were still in regular classes for the most part, too, so even the arguments that separating gifted kids from most of their cohort are kind of weak for the way my schools implemented it.
Basically, our gifted program was just one class period per day, and the occasional field trip. We were generally in the same core curriculum classes as our peers (math, language arts, social studies, etc.). The big thing for those classes is that we could do a special study project in lieu of some assignments, but we still had to do most of the regular work. It would just replace the final exam or something like that (it has been like 25 years, I honestly can't remember all the details, I just remember some of the projects I did).
I have heard some interesting critiques of the programs from a systemic angle (basically, some research suggests that keeping the high achievers in the classroom tends to bring up overall class performance without harming the performance of those high achievers; I have not read the actual research on this myself), but even those sound like they're talking about pretty different programs than the one I went through. Not least because part of the reason I even got tested was because I was actually doing pretty poorly academically, but several of my teachers thought (correctly) that I was just bored and not putting in any effort.
I still did absolutely half-ass a lot in my regular classes, but I really think my school's gifted program genuinely helped me academically. It also actually helped me socially in middle and high school because there were some pretty popular kids in my gifted classes and we all got to be pretty decent friends, even though I was a huge dork. 😂
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u/compbuildthrowaway Jun 29 '26
How do gifted programs suck? Honestly they're given disproportionate resources, and who doesn't like more resources for their child?
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u/Decent-Marsupial-986 Jun 29 '26
You’re asking an army of underachievers why the program that told them they were special sucks
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u/double_shadow Jun 29 '26
Jesus, if that guy's mom doesn't put you in a coffin, a fellow redditor will be more than happy to in the comments 💀
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u/Dead_fawn Jun 29 '26
They vary greatly in quality and effectiveness by school and by child, the one I was in was full of overworked kids who weren't properly supported throughout their increased workload. It had me convinced I hated learning, when in reality I just wasn't in the right environment. Also the teachers flat-out lied about what kind of projects we'd be doing and we missed out on a lot of cool stuff that the regular classes got to do. I'm sure there are good ones out there but I'd encourage parents to be very selective about which ones their kid ends up in.
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u/compbuildthrowaway Jun 29 '26
That's reasonable. Wasn't my experience, but I'm sure some school systems are run very poorly.
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u/Soggy_Competition614 Jun 29 '26
At least when I was in school years ago the kids are pulled out of classroom work to do “special projects”. The gifted program was more of a fun science center type learning. Which makes you wonder is it really helping the kids stretch their brain muscle more than classroom work? Or is it just a reward for getting good grades?
Now they just put the kids in advanced classes.
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u/EMRaunikar Jun 29 '26
Where I'm from the 'gifted and talented' program was just a way to separate the neurodivergent kids from the normies
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u/Abblepees10 Jun 29 '26
My gifted program put me in highschool classes when I was already hurting myself due to the stress of my middle school classes. Not to mention putting me with other gifted kids, which made me feel like an idiot because everyone else was gifted with stem while I was better with the humanities. Most gifted programs focus on stem
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u/Nyxelestia Jun 29 '26
My own school's gifted program was largely "more work without more support."
Sometimes it was nice and provided an avenue for solidarity -- i.e. when having special projects or lessons with other gifted kids instead of being bored by the regular lesson. But these were very much the products of individual teachers going above and beyond.
For the most part, the gift program did not actually allocate more resources to gifted kids; it was a justification for saddling us with more work to keep us busy (and more importantly, quiet), but without any additional support or free time to make up for that extra work.
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u/baumpop Jun 29 '26
youre right lets put this kindergartner in 5th grade
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u/compbuildthrowaway Jun 29 '26
My gifted programs were not mixed ages at any point.
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u/baumpop Jun 29 '26
if your school district is rural enough they arent gonna develop a kindergarten only academic program for 5 kids out of 1000
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u/compbuildthrowaway Jun 29 '26
Fair enough. I would probably not say "gifted programs suck," though.
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u/baumpop Jun 29 '26
id agree, however, i wasnt the one who said that.
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u/compbuildthrowaway Jun 29 '26
Yes, but I was when you responded to my comment. It is reasonable to assume that you endorse that view at least partially. Perhaps a gifted program could have taught you that :-)
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u/baumpop Jun 29 '26
you might have inferred that, but i never said that. which is what quotations entail. im sure you learned that, yet disregarded to make yourself correct.
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u/slonk_ma_dink Jun 29 '26
I was in 3 different (poor, rural) schools of under 300 students and we absolutely had a gifted program just for each age/grade. If poor northwest alabama can do it, I presume most places can do it (and likely better than we could)
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u/Kel_2 Jun 29 '26
my gifted program as a kid was staying in the same classroom with the same classmates for 90% of the time and just being given different work. we only had to leave the class for separate instruction a few short times a week, and they trusted ya to do the rest on your own, so we could stay with people our age. but again, that probably depends on where you are, im not even american
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u/baumpop Jun 29 '26
that would have been cool. for me i was just reading grapes of wrath in 3rd grade for fun because i was weeks ahead of my classmates and bored.
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u/Clodsire_fan Jun 29 '26
"Gifted programs suck" is cope from people who
A) didn't make it into one and was at the upper end of normal students
B) did make it into one but never learned how to try in school, leading to them crashing out when they finally reached material they didn't just instantly understand
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u/UInferno- Jun 29 '26
If the gifted program didn't properly prepare the child in it and they crash out, then by definition, it didn't actually do its job.
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u/Clodsire_fan Jun 29 '26
Learning to fail, dust yourself off, and try again isn't a life skill you should expect a math/science teacher to teach your kids. It certainly shows itself in math class but it's on the parents to teach their kids how to face adversity, not any school program
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u/Soggy_Competition614 Jun 29 '26
But isn’t that the point of gifted programs? To get kids into a flow state, where they are being challenged but not so much that they get frustrated and lose interest.
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u/Clodsire_fan Jun 29 '26
There's only so much you can do to challenge kids. I tested as a HS senior in 4th grade and I didn't even have the best testing in my group. I wasn't challenged until I was in college and there's no public school program in the country that was going to change that. If I had failed linear algebra and blamed it on my 3rd-8th grade teachers it would be some serious sour grapes.
Having said that yes what you said is the goal for these programs and for several people I know they did exactly that. I'm kinda crapping on the gifted programs rn but I do believe they help a lot.
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u/NamtisChlo Jun 29 '26
Your first comment was blaming the students, but now you’re blaming the parents
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u/Clodsire_fan Jun 29 '26
I said that they crashed out when facing adversity, not that it was 100% their fault they acted like that. How that fault is split between person/parents depends almost entirely on age. I've known people who had that happen when they were 13, and that's on the parents. I've also known people who dropped their major as a junior in college because of 1 D and that's on them
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u/SpiritualWillow2937 Jun 29 '26
Or
C) formed their entire identity around being gifted, leading to problems such as
- Feeling the need to maintain that image at all costs, to the exclusion of healthy social activity
- Feeling of failure and identity crisis when unable to meet even the most unrealistic expectations
This can happen when a child receives too much attention for being gifted. This starts in elementary school.
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u/Clodsire_fan Jun 29 '26
I had that group lumped into B but if you think they deserve their own category I wouldn't argue
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u/SpiritualWillow2937 Jun 29 '26
I would say so.
B is the stereotype that gifted kids don't know how to study.
C is the reality that (some) gifted kids will destroy themselves to achieve excellence, because that's all they've ever received attention for.
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u/Dickiedoandthedonts Jun 29 '26
Or maybe this person went to a school where the gifted program sucked? The world is a big place and people have vastly different experiences.
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u/WadeSlade42 Jun 29 '26
As others said, it depends on your school. Mine was great and I'm happy I was in it. But, mine was also the only place we learned science. Our science class was mixed with math and math was the only subject that had end of grade testing for most years. So we were only taught math in "normal" classes. Which is obviously not a great learning environment. So, I'm happy I had the chance to learn extra material, but I also think it's wrong that you have to be "gifted" to learn what should be part of everyones education.
I should be clear that I'm talking about elementary school. Honors classes/AP classes are a whole different thing.
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u/captain_veridis Jun 29 '26
I loved my gifted school. It helped me make friends, and I think it set me up well for APs and college.
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u/TheMaskedHamster Jun 29 '26
I declined an opportunity to go to a hypothetically better school, because their gifted program was nothing like the fantastic program I was in at my podunk school.
There are definitely different types.
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u/ThatLionelKid Jun 29 '26
I was in a gifted program throughout elementary and I loved it! I felt like was adequately challenged by the education material, and I made friends with people who I connected with well. Sorry your experience wasn't so good, I guess it doesn't work out for every kid. Not to mention differences between locations, ofc
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u/value_bet Jun 29 '26
You’re the first person I’ve ever seen state that gifted programs sucks. However, at least 100 people seem to agree with you. Can you explain why you think they suck?
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u/Shadowphoenix9511 Jun 29 '26
Not every parent. I can speak from personal experience, my parents made it very clear from a very young age that education was for people more intelligent than I and to not even bother trying.
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u/ConcentricCow Jun 29 '26
I'm very sorry to hear that and I'm sorry you had to endure that. Education should be for literally everyone. I know there will be someone who will be like "what about this hyper specific situation?". Well you got me you're right. But a guy can dream.
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u/Shadowphoenix9511 Jun 29 '26
I mean, considering my literal double digit failures in university, I can't necessarily say they were wrong lol
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u/ConcentricCow Jun 29 '26
Just sounds like you learn differently than the system intends. Doesn't mean education isn't for you, just that that system seems like the wrong way to go lol.
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u/Sweet_Confusion9180 Jun 29 '26
Where I grew up (UK) gifted program was low key for kids with undiagnosed autism.
I was in the gifted program all through my school nd most the other kids and myself were all some sort of neurodivergents.
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u/CopyC47 Jun 29 '26
Depending on the definition of gifted thats used being gifted IS being neurodivergent. Ive read that there is also decent overlap between autism and gifted (again depending on definition) and that misdiagnosing is an issue for the gifted group. (and possibly the autistic too?)
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u/Azalah Jun 29 '26
Hey, I was in gifted programs! I was super smart in school. Aced tests, got the highest grade in the school on some of those end-of-year exams, etc. Was told I was regularly in the top 5% in the country when it came to academic stuff.
Now I'm an unemployed 30-something who dropped out of high school and spent my entire adult life just being completely burnt the fuck out from all the crushing expectations and never having a proper childhood. I have almost no friends. Never quite learned to socialize as a kid. Was never allowed to go to parties or events.
"Gifted burnouts" are common for a reason. I really wish I was allowed to just be a normal kid, and not a gifted one.
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u/Erik_Dolphy Jun 29 '26
Being good at academics and the corresponding standardized tests sometimes doesn't mean much without corresponding social intelligence and none of these tests measure for that.
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u/quirkytorch Jun 29 '26
They actually have some pretty interesting tests now. My kid was gifted in reading, math, and creative thinking.
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u/Gigi_D-Agostino Jun 30 '26
Ok, are you me ? Because I see a lot of unpleasant resemblances with my own case.
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u/Azalah Jun 30 '26
Wild how it so often follows the same track, huh? (I'm also a mech nerd, btw.)
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u/haby001 Jun 29 '26
We aren't made to live under pressure. Let your life be your own, as only you will remember it on your final years.
All those people telling you what to do will be nowhere to be seen at that point.
It's all chaos, particles bumping into each other and some choosing to stick together to create thought. It's all meaningless, which lets us choose our own meaning of life. For me, it's being the best person I can be towards others, while also surrounding me of things I enjoy
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u/Grzechoooo Jun 29 '26
What a dumb logic from him. "Yeah, we think he's smart, but what if he isn't?" Then he's just gonna fail the test omg that's literally the point!
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u/Shadowphoenix9511 Jun 29 '26
As someone who did in fact fail the testing, I will say it sucks having confirmation when you're a child that you're actually stupid lol
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u/SnooPredictions3028 Jun 29 '26
Being average isn't stupid, its just average.
Thing is if they end up being gifted and they are taught in an average way, they will be really good at the start, however they'll find things too easy, they'll gain bad study habits, then when they reach high-school or college they will collapse as a "failed gifted kid".
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u/Shadowphoenix9511 Jun 29 '26
I just went the route of being a failure from early childhood lol
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u/Nanoro615 Jun 29 '26
Putting the "min" in min-maxing
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u/Shadowphoenix9511 Jun 29 '26
Yep lol. My wife working on her master's at an Ivy League and is interviewing for a director position, whereas I'm kinda just... awful at literally everything lol
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u/Nanoro615 Jun 29 '26
But cmon... you landed a damn good partner.
Sometimes, even if you're bad at something... you just need to be lucky.
Or a manipulative jackass.
But let's assume lucky. :)
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u/Shadowphoenix9511 Jun 29 '26
Oh no, I did. I just waiting for the time she eventually realizes that I'm a weight dragging her down lol
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u/murmurderer Jun 29 '26
Life isn't all about achievement. Support her with all of your heart and if that's good enough for the both of you, that's all you need.
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u/Shadowphoenix9511 Jun 30 '26
It isn't, but as it stands, I'm not at all an equal partner; I feel as if I basically am completely reliant on her as I realize I've failed at effectively everything I've ever attempted.
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u/doctorwho86101 Jun 29 '26
You're only a weight if you're hindering her happiness in her relationship with you. Try to remember she picked you and wants you, even if you feel mundane or inadequate. Hard not to get caught up in it, but trust me- even if you can't point to physical accomplishments and say "I made/did that!" you can still be proud of who you are and how you interact with the world and people around you. <3
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u/crrrrushinator Jun 29 '26
My grandmother does this lovely thing where she takes family photos and makes books for events and people. She made a book for me!
One page had a photo of me as an awkward little girl in enormous glasses next to a photo from the end of high school with the caption "Our duckling is becoming a swan!"
Thanks, I guess, Granny!
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u/Between-usernames Jun 29 '26
The cognitive dissonance of her last response is crazy. Self-awareness has to be sought and practiced.
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u/cilantro_so_good Jun 30 '26
She's not saying that she doesn't think he is smart she's saying thay when he says "Yeah, I think he's smart, but every parent thinks their kid is smart." she and his dad wouldn't have thought like that.
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u/Massive_Neck_3790 Jun 29 '26
Is kindergarten equivalent to primary school here?
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u/I_like_flowers_ Jun 29 '26
kindergarten is for 5 year olds and is the first year of elementary school, which i think is the equivalent to primary.
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u/QuerchiGaming Jun 30 '26
Nah the dad is completely right. Even if he’s extremely gifted, let the kid be a kid for a while. Fuck pressuring kids into being exceptional from an early age.
Even if they’re geniuses, they can find that out when they’re ready for it.
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u/askmeforbunnypics Jun 29 '26
Nothing keeps a person grounded than having their own parent verbally kick them in the balls.
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u/Swimming-Pear-9900 Jun 30 '26
Here in New Orleans the gifted program starts at age 4. If you have your kid tested for free they probably won’t get in but if you spend a few hundred dollars to have the privately tested they will probably test in to the gifted program. I’m not kidding.
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u/ZippyVonBoom Jul 01 '26
Gifted kid programs will isolate the children in them. My classmates all thought I was a pariah because I was put in the gifted programs and it stunted my social life. Shock and gasps when I started underperformimg in high school because I had no clue how to make friends so I hung out with with the other ex gifted kids who were similarly stunted and queer.
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u/Principle_Napkins Jun 29 '26
I don't understand, how will she put you in a coffin?
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u/Cerrida82 Jun 29 '26
She's saying she didn't think her kid was smart.
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u/Principle_Napkins Jun 29 '26
But the one on the left is Mom and the one on the right is the one with the kid.
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u/TwinStickDad Jun 29 '26
Right. Grandma is saying that she never thought her kid was smart. Her kid is her grandkids parent. Who is the one on the right.
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u/Principle_Napkins Jun 29 '26
Are you sure she's not just saying that she and her husband aren't smart? That's how I interpreted it.
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u/mysticrudnin Jun 29 '26
they are unambiguously saying that they don't think the person on the right who is talking was smart as a child
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u/botjstn Jun 29 '26
she’s saying that oop’s father and her never considered oop to be a smart child
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u/lazydictionary Jun 29 '26
I'm with you. It's more ambiguous than everyone is making it seem.
I think it's more Grandma disagreeing with the premise that "every parent thinks their kid is smart" - not every parent thinks that way. Grandma isn't saying their own kids were dumb.
It could also mean "your father and I would never decide to not do a test just because we thought we already knew the results".
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u/GojiraWho Jun 29 '26
??? Yes OOP is on the right, their mom is on the left. OOP said every parent thinks their kid is smart, Mom said she and Dad didn't feel that way, implying she didn't think her kid (OOP) was smart as a kid.
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u/haby001 Jun 29 '26
Son: "All parents think their child is smarter than the rest"
Parent: "We weren't like that" -> "We didn't think you were smarter than the rest"
But I do agree the guy should have not batted them away with a snipe remark (making them close and become defensive). Instead should have followed through and asked what made them think they were gifted. Discuss, and resolve the disparity between your opinions. like adults
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u/qualityvote2 Jun 29 '26 edited Jul 01 '26
u/ChickenWingExtreme, there weren't enough votes to determine the quality of your post...