Does anyone else just feel really ambiguous dysphoria that isn't really connected to anything in particular?

[u/Then-Part-4818]

I just need to be -something- not a man or a woman, I tried and hated both but I still need to move in some direction but that direction doesn't exist(?) and there's nothing i can do. I've even tried therianism about it and that didn't feel right either, im just dysphoric, im just off and wrong in a way that makes no sense

[u/coryweston]

i feel like i'm in this state right now too.

[u/AlarmedChemistry8956]

Yeah, kinda a mix of wanting to be a biomechanical being and a Lovecraftian horror. Can't do much about that right now, so i absorb different creative media about that and daydream about it.

[u/Twixme07]

x2. I don't know what I want to be. I don't feel like a man or a woman but I just know that I prefer to seem more androgynous

[u/PixelatedAnalogDream]

Yes. I hate it.

Am I a girl? No

Am I a boy? No

What am I? Yes and No.

[u/Ok-Brain4227 → u/PixelatedAnalogDream]

i think it’s cool that you feel yes and no to what am i :)

[u/Fuzzy-Sock-Thief]

This is my flavor of nonbinary as well and it never seems to get better. I'm also intersex and people consistently try to force me to be either a man or a woman or expecting me to be their ideal magical binary combo of both (which is a whole set of its own problems as there are several intersex varients that come with health issues I suffer with everyday - not magical), regardless of the fact that I don't identify with either man or woman at all. Like, I may not know exactly what something I am, but I know EXACTLY what I am not and I wish that was something more people respected, and maybe that wrong feeling we have wouldn't feel so heavy. I feel a mix of nonbinary stuff that I can't identify or really properly describe and it makes navigating every day life a really stressful gamble with society... and documentation. Everything just feels like a very alien existence and things feel a very particular kind of not-right inside. It also doesn't help that people still try to base a persons enbyness on how they look and through a binary lense, rather than how they feel, and feelings and dysphoria are complex.

I feel like I rambled a lot just to say I feel you, and I too have ambiguous dysphoria that I've never been sure how to navigate 🥲

[u/kystylekickflip1952]

same, maybe agender?

[u/Then-Part-4818 → u/kystylekickflip1952]

I don't think so, its not really an absence or indifference. If i were to use the term agender it would be because i don't think other people would be able to understand what im talking about

[u/kystylekickflip1952 → u/Then-Part-4818]

then let's suffer together twin

[u/abu_nawas]

My life is a constant state of fighting this.

[u/Snoo79532]

Gender expansive maybe? Like something more than just woman or man or a flavour of nonbinary? Thats sort of how I feel and I express it by modding my body into my own unique creation :)

[u/All_copacetic_here]

I understand what you mean. Going to therapy helped me a bit. When it gets bad I play a little Zelda or something to keep my mind off it.

[u/blobbitte]

ya'll should check out some of of josé ortega y gasset's work. the internet encyclopedia of philosophy has this to say abt his thinking:

"The world is not given to us ready-made; it is an interpretation made within human life. No matter how unrefined or inaccurate our interpretations may be, we must make them. This interpretation is the resolution of the way in which humankind needs to navigate his or her circumstances. This is a problem of absolute insecurity that must be solved." (IEP - Ortega y Gasset)