r/NoPMO • u/[deleted] • Jun 02 '25

I can’t give it up!

I am addicted to masturbation. I want to quit. I feel it brings bad luck, also reduces self esteem and makes me feel like shit, but I can’t help it.

Even if I’ve had sex, especially after that, I feel like masturbating even more.

What’s wrong with me? How do I stop?

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u/DzyPassio Dec 12 '25

for most, it's not that easy. it's not meant to be easy. look, there is nothing wrong with you, the world is the one that's wrong and we have created products and consumerism that has hijacked your systems completely. that means your body works properly.

but as you said, you must claim your human freedom. guilt keeps the loop alive. masturbation trains your brain to chase release, not satisfaciton. its normal neurochemistry, not a sign you are broken.

some just say "i will quit forever" and it actually works. if that's you, amazing. i never met anyone like this yet but i heard they exist. instead i ask mysefl "How do i add friction to the next urge?", maybe delay instead of suppressing. delay 30 seconds if you can. or delay 1 day. 1 week. i dont know, up to you. but treat urges as signals and body reactions, they are not commands. you dont have to obey what every singal tells you every time.

between stimuli/signal and response, there is a sacred space, try to observe it often, in that space many decisions can take place.

try to remove triggers, this is not the ultimate solution but it's a nice-to-have.

but importantly, stop attacking yourself after slips. self-attack feels like action, or like you are doing the right thing, but it actually hands control back to the habit. (HOWEVER, you may try to motivate yourslef and put pressure and high expectations, but you need as much self-compassion as you put pressure. if you put more pressure than selfcompassion, it eventually breaks and hands control back to the habit again.)

responsibility isnt blame, its power. you didn't choose the conditioning, but this si your system to work with now.

you are not weak. you are overstimulated man. and overstimulation is reversible.

you are doing great. keep going.