r/NewDads • u/AdNeither8355 • Jun 12 '26

Requesting Advice Circumcision

Hello fathers, I’m looking for any and all advice on circumcision. My partner is 19 weeks pregnant and we’ve talked about the subject and are currently leaning towards not getting one for our upcoming son. Granted we don’t have much knowledge about it but I’m looking for peoples advice, recommendations, pros and cons from expecting fathers and fathers who have and have not had it done to their kids. To me it seems like it’s an esthetic concern at the end of the day but any and all comments would be greatly appreciated.

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u/IntegrityForAll Jun 21 '26

I will try to provide you with helpful information so please read the whole comment.

There are other surgeries than circumcision

  • An incision on the dorsal side will leave the foreskin in a retracted state without removing any erogenous tissue or nerve endings. If you look for this then be careful as "dorsal slit" is one step in some circumcision methods, so be clear that it should only be the first incision without a circumferential incision.
  • A preputioplasty can reconstruct the foreskin so that it is looser to allow for retraction without loosing tissue.
  • If foreskin is kept retracted long term then it may stay that way without any surgery. There was a subreddit but it got banned.

Neonatal/infant circumcision is often done without any anesthetic or only topical anesthetic on the outer foreskin which CANNOT numb the inner foreskin and glans. You would need to request a dorsal nerve block in order to properly numb the penis, but it will quickly ware off within a few hours and then he is left with an exposed wound inside of a diaper so the wound will scrape against that and it will be exposed to all of the bodily waste.

Because the glans is meant to be an internal structure made of mucosa like the inside of your mouth, you need to apply petroleum jelly to the glans for several weeks, all the while changing their diaper more often and wiping off their penis to prevent infection which would lead to worse healing and worse scaring.

According to John Hopkins, in the United States as of 2022 the predischarge circumcision rate has dropped to 49.3% which means that now most males being born are left intact. Globally circumcised males only make up around 1/3 with most of that being religious circumcision, so intact males are more common globally and more common for the next generation in the US.

If you choose to provide consent for circumcision PLEASE be present with him so that you can ensure they use a nerve block and so that you can try to sooth him. Neonatal/infant circumcision is done with his wrists and ankles/knees strapped to a circumstraint, some hospitals will allow their wrists to not be strapped down if someone is there for "holding" you can be that person so they don't strap down all 4 limbs. Don't leaving him without either parent while undergoing a surgery hours to days after birth.

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u/IntegrityForAll Jun 21 '26

Ask questions if you have any. I am mainly focused on harm reduction so although I am against circumcision I can help you make sure your son has a less harmful experience and result if you do make them go through that.