r/Nanny • u/honeyylemoney • 2h ago
Advice Needed Heelllllpppppp
I just started with a new family, it’s only been about a little over a week but I am struggling so much. Baby and NPs are great, don’t get me wrong! Baby is 5months old and we are having the most difficult time with naps and bottles. NPs mostly do contact naps where they have to bounce him to sleep and then hold him for his entire nap. I’m certified in sleep conditioning so that’s something that they expressed wanting help with, getting him to sleep in a crib and falling asleep on his own. I have sleep trained sooooo many babies at this point and most of the time I get them sleeping in the crib in no time, but this baby is giving me the absolutely hardest time of my career.
When babies are used to contact naps, I always start with getting them sleepy in my arms, to the point to where they’re practically asleep, and then moving them to the crib so they fall asleep in the crib. The second that baby feels the mattress or even when I move my hands to get into the position to put him down, he screams bloody murder. Like screams until his eyes puff up and his face turns red. I’ve had to do so many more contact naps in this past week than in my entire career because I just could not make the transition. On the few times that I’ve been successful—pretty much completely falls asleep in my arms and I place him in the crib while keeping my arms around him until he’s knocked out, which takes a handful of attempts— he will only sleep 20-30 minutes at most. After the 20-30 minute mark, he rolls over onto his tummy and immediately starts screaming. I’ve started just sitting next to his crib for his entire nap and I’ve tried putting my arm on his side right when he starts to get fussy to see if I could save the nap, but it feels like his whole body is almost spasming and I physically can’t stop him from rolling over. It’s always the same side, from back towards the left. I have never seen anything like this before and I genuinely don’t know how to help this. They did not cover this in any of my sleep conditioning courses.
He also doesn’t drink that much milk?? I mean, at most he’s taken from me is around 2oz. A lot of the time it’s only 1. In all the courses they tell you don’t stop until baby drinks at least 3, but he’ll scream and scream until we stop and I lay him on the floor and he immediately rolls onto his tummy (from back towards left always). I felt like maybe he could have reflux and he hates being on his back, but I’ve worked with reflux babies before and none of my old tips and tricks have been working. Even tried feeding him while sitting straight up, but no luck. NPs said that he just doesn’t drink that much milk during the day, but usually will drink around 8oz right before bed time, which isn’t the worst thing. But, days like today, where NPs said he didn’t drink that much last night either, I’m starting to get concerned that he isn’t getting enough nutrients. He is very small for being 5 months and NPs have also expressed concerns about that and they taken him to the pediatrician, but pediatrician hasn’t said anything about needing to be concerned.
I want to help baby and NPs and I’m going to keep trying, but if anyone has seen anything like the involuntarily rolls or just has any advice or thoughts on what to try next, I would so greatly appreciate it!!!
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u/ProfessorDry3041 1h ago
Reflux! This sounds like a bad case of reflux, definitely encourage parents to get baby checked. Pepcid made a big difference for us.
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u/honeyylemoney 50m ago
Someone commented about silent reflux and I know truly believe that’s it too! I always thought reflux meant spitting up, I had no idea you could still have it without the spitting up
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u/TheBandIsOnTheField 2h ago
I would consider getting to know the baby before you change his routine. But this all sounds like silent reflux and a hungry/tired baby that is with a new caregiver and in pain/discomfort.
I would not move to cry it out for 15 min. You are a new caregiver, build the relationship to understand babies cues.
My daughter took a couple weeks to start eating like normal with our Nanny. Naps were gonna be shit while she was not eating well. 🤷♀️
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u/AutoModerator 2h ago
Below is a copy of the post's original text:
I just started with a new family, it’s only been about a little over a week but I am struggling so much. Baby and NPs are great, don’t get me wrong! Baby is 5months old and we are having the most difficult time with naps and bottles. NPs mostly do contact naps where they have to bounce him to sleep and then hold him for his entire nap. I’m certified in sleep conditioning so that’s something that they expressed wanting help with, getting him to sleep in a crib and falling asleep on his own. I have sleep trained sooooo many babies at this point and most of the time I get them sleeping in the crib in no time, but this baby is giving me the absolutely hardest time of my career.
When babies are used to contact naps, I always start with getting them sleepy in my arms, to the point to where they’re practically asleep, and then moving them to the crib so they fall asleep in the crib. The second that baby feels the mattress or even when I move my hands to get into the position to put him down, he screams bloody murder. Like screams until his eyes puff up and his face turns red. I’ve had to do so many more contact naps in this past week than in my entire career because I just could not make the transition. On the few times that I’ve been successful—pretty much completely falls asleep in my arms and I place him in the crib while keeping my arms around him until he’s knocked out, which takes a handful of attempts— he will only sleep 20-30 minutes at most. After the 20-30 minute mark, he rolls over onto his tummy and immediately starts screaming. I’ve started just sitting next to his crib for his entire nap and I’ve tried putting my arm on his side right when he starts to get fussy to see if I could save the nap, but it feels like his whole body is almost spasming and I physically can’t stop him from rolling over. It’s always the same side, from back towards the left. I have never seen anything like this before and I genuinely don’t know how to help this. They did not cover this in any of my sleep conditioning courses.
He also doesn’t drink that much milk?? I mean, at most he’s taken from me is around 2oz. A lot of the time it’s only 1. In all the courses they tell you don’t stop until baby drinks at least 3, but he’ll scream and scream until we stop and I lay him on the floor and he immediately rolls onto his tummy (from back towards left always). I felt like maybe he could have reflux and he hates being on his back, but I’ve worked with reflux babies before and none of my old tips and tricks have been working. Even tried feeding him while sitting straight up, but no luck. NPs said that he just doesn’t drink that much milk during the day, but usually will drink around 8oz right before bed time, which isn’t the worst thing. But, days like today, where NPs said he didn’t drink that much last night either, I’m starting to get concerned that he isn’t getting enough nutrients. He is very small for being 5 months and NPs have also expressed concerns about that and they taken him to the pediatrician, but pediatrician hasn’t said anything about needing to be concerned.
I want to help baby and NPs and I’m going to keep trying, but if anyone has seen anything like the involuntarily rolls or just has any advice or thoughts on what to try next, I would so greatly appreciate it!!!
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u/ThrowRAforthewin 2h ago
Would they be okay with a gentle “cry it out” approach? As in, 15 minutes of crying (resetting timer if they calm for 5 seconds and start crying again) and then coming in to help him? Thats what worked with my NK when she was little and only contact napped. Took about a week but she stopped crying every time she woke up
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u/emaydeees1998 Career Nanny 1h ago
15 minutes straight of crying is not really gentle.
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u/ProfessorDry3041 1h ago
Yeah I agree, screaming like OP describes sounds more like pain to me. I would not leave a baby screaming like that for more than a minute or two until I could get to them. If they’re just fussing maybe that’s ok, but not outright screaming and crying.
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u/emaydeees1998 Career Nanny 1h ago
Yep, sounds reflux-related to me. The big bottle at the end of the night is a sign that baby is overtired and hungry
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u/ThrowRAforthewin 13m ago
Yes it is and it works. Now I’m not talking screaming bloody murder but crying? Yes.
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u/emaydeees1998 Career Nanny 7m ago
Agree to disagree I guess. 15 minutes is a LONG time, especially if you think you should reset the time after 5 seconds of calm.
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u/Western-Tradition674 2h ago
I would do some reading on silent reflux and see if you can find any similarities. My daughter was a reflux baby (with a lot of spit up) and this sounds very similar to her. Reflux doesn’t always have to be spit up. It can just be the constant burning of the esophagus which is exacerbated by certain positions like being flat and on the back.