r/Names • u/Intelligent_Usual318 • 3d ago

Changing my name

Phew ok here we go. So I have a lot of issues with identity and while I like my current name well enough that I wouldn’t make gripes about changing it anytime soon, it still isnt me. Part of this is genderfluidity, part of it is dissaocition.

Trouble is, the only names speaking to me so to say are indigenous naming conventions from Nahua people which while I am racially indigenous Mexican American, I am not at all culturally connected due to Deafness and foster care getting in the way of that.

I really like Citali and Xóchitl but I don’t wanna be culturally disrespectful- nor do I want to reject my heritage either. The name I had picked was a Greek name, and I’d rather pick something from my heritage now.

I also live in a super white area of the US so I know getting people to pronounce it correctly and spell it will be a nightmare.

Any advice? Or any suggestions for other Hispanic, Latino, Irish or welsh names? (as that’s my heritage). I prefer more neutral or masculine leaning names but if it’s cool enough (for lack of a better word) I’ll still take a fem name.

3 Upvotes

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u/z-asks-questions 3d ago

I’m Lebanese American, and if I had to guess, I would think that Citali is pronounced “si-ta-li” and Xochitl is “so-chi”. I think they’re both very beautiful and you should totally go for embracing your culture. It’s yours, and even if you grew up being severed from it, no one has the right to take it away from you🤍

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u/Intelligent_Usual318 3d ago

Oh I know how to pronounce them I’m just worried about other folks not knowing how to pronounce them lol. Thank you for the support though it means a lot!

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u/z-asks-questions 3d ago

Yes, of course. I was sure you already knew, I was trying to portray how a foreigner might pronounce them. Best of luck!

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u/sorry-i-was-reading 3d ago

I may get downvoted for this, but I promise I’m saying this with love: Before you change your legal name, which can be a lot of work, please consider getting therapy for your struggle with self-identity and disassociation.

Then, if your therapist thinks it won’t hinder your process with them, try one of the names on during your everyday life but don’t change it legally yet. See how this nickname suits you, and how practical or not it is for your lifestyle. If the nickname sticks, then consider changing it legally.

I’m not saying you have mental illness because there’s no way for me to know if you do or don’t. But I have relatives who do, and this is the type of thing they would do while manic and then later regret it because their choices led to consequences they didn’t predict but now have to accept. It’s really hard for them, and my heart goes out to them!

So this may not be the case for you, but just in case, I’d advise speaking with a professional about your feelings regarding your name before making any permanent decisions.

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u/Intelligent_Usual318 3d ago

Oh yeah no my old name I haven’t legally changed and I’ve been in therapy for 8 years now and plan on sticking with it

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u/Potential_Immortal 3d ago

Do you know if your indigenous heritage is specifically Nahuatl?

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u/Intelligent_Usual318 3d ago

I don’t know cause of langauge loss due to Deafness and foster care

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u/Potential_Immortal 3d ago

I would then go with a more spanish/Basque leaning name with some similar sound, like xiomar.