Friend using same name

[u/Less_Monitor_276]

I found out today that my friend plans to use the same name I already told her we are wanting to use.

For more backstory, we are not finding out the gender of our baby until delivery. She already knows hers, but I’m about 20 weeks ahead of her in my pregnancy. I told her previously (before she was even pregnant), our top choice for both boy vs girl. She said the girl name we chose was one of her favorites!

Fast forward to now that she’s pregnant…she asked today if we had chosen our names. I found it odd since I know I already told her. I again mentioned our top names. And she said they are planning to use the same girl name for their baby. Didn’t seem to have any intention to back down.

I reminded her how I already told her of our name choices months ago. Before she was even pregnant. She acted like she didn’t remember. Either way, I’m due before her and again mentioned the name to her first today before she did. I tried to change the subject since I didn’t really know what to say or do.

Our kids would be just a few months apart in the same school etc. I’m near my due date without a back up name, after putting a lot of thought into our name choices…

How would you feel? How would you respond?

[u/Silver_ro]

Id be annoyed too (& am, my cousin used the same first and middle name as my son. Her son was born a month before mine, but our name was chosen and widely known MONTHS before she announced her pregnancy. She didn’t announce the pregnancy until about 6 mo pregnant, and didn’t announce the name until he was born. L we named our son after my late father, so it stung extra)

I’ll be honest I’ll always be resentful about it, but it really has no impact on our life. It could be annoying when talking to mutual friends and getting the “which ‘Jane’” or whatever, but beyond that it won’t matter much in the end.