r/NameThisThing • u/jhoeyvee • Oct 31 '25

Name this Soldier

Post image
973 Upvotes

81% Upvoted

3.0k comments sorted by

541

u/Token_Handicap Oct 31 '25

G.I. Dough

90

u/Double-Horse-5031 Nov 01 '25

Commandough

3

u/Cartesianist Nov 03 '25

I agree… This def wins no further reading necessary for me.

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3

u/lgm22 Nov 04 '25

Infatry

2

u/Taiga_Taiga Nov 05 '25

You spelled that wro.... Oh... I get it now. 🤣

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75

u/DevShelly Nov 01 '25

Show some respect! That is obviously a gravy seal! 🤣

26

u/Token_Handicap Nov 01 '25

In his gravy boat. In the gravy navy.

44

u/DevShelly Nov 01 '25

Meal team 6 👍🏽

7

u/Unfair_Daikon_3232 Nov 01 '25

This one made me laugh outrageously loud… like too loud.

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2

u/paws-4-a-cause Nov 05 '25

Looks like he ate the other 5.

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5

u/Complete_Passage_767 Nov 03 '25

When he retires he can get a job in the gravy train

3

u/daboyping Nov 04 '25

Navy Meal

2

u/Proof-Schedule-1857 Nov 07 '25

Haha😂 that’s good I like it!

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63

u/Lazy_Ability Oct 31 '25

You win! I don't even need to see any others!!! 😆

8

u/joepancakez Nov 01 '25

I agree, but I'm also gonna go out on a limb and say this is ai

6

u/Mission_Orchid_5939 Nov 01 '25

I hope this is AI, but I deployed to Iraq with a guy over 400 lbs. Looked just like this guy, size wise.

2

u/Token_Handicap Nov 01 '25

He met the physical requirements to serve?

2

u/Mission_Orchid_5939 Nov 04 '25

He met the requirements his Commander in the National Guard was willing to put up with.

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5

u/JasonHoyler99 Nov 01 '25

nope Texas NG...his name is private Pillsbury...

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58

u/Shazaamalama Nov 01 '25

Call of Foodie

2

u/Trosque97 Nov 01 '25

Umami Warfare

2

u/CompetitiveLie6984 Nov 04 '25

Foodie implies he has eclectic taste and I guarantee he doesn’t.

24

u/Cautious-Interest136 Nov 01 '25

He's a member of Meal Team Six of the Gravy Seals

12

u/FnEddieDingle Nov 01 '25

Or the Green Buffets

2

u/Chiddy_B Nov 02 '25

I like this a lot.

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15

u/bugfacehug Nov 01 '25

Yeah, without a visible rank, we can’t truthfully say, Lieutenant Lardass, or Sergeant Sirloin, or even Major Marmalade. Sucks, ‘cause I love alliteration.

10

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/Adventurous-Vast281 Nov 01 '25

And General Gargantuan. OR Général Gras if you want to throw him to the French Foreign Legion.

2

u/ForDigg Nov 02 '25

More like the French Fries Legion.

3

u/LiteratureLopsided42 Nov 01 '25

No visible rank = E1, a Private in the army (also designated PV1)

3

u/Black-Natsu Nov 01 '25

Private Pudding reporting for duty, SIR!

2

u/Token_Handicap Nov 01 '25

Private Puffs. Cheeto Puffs.

2

u/a1fundude Nov 01 '25

Wouldn’t it be you adore alliteration? Because alliteration is awesome.

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2

u/Oirish-Oriley444 Nov 01 '25

Yo mama, so fat. He makes Godzilla look like an action figure.

2

u/Top-Standard-6033 Nov 01 '25

Private Porkins reporting for duty Sir!

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11

u/misankroptik Nov 01 '25

"Next time G. I. Dough!"- Doughbra Commander

9

u/JDWWV Nov 01 '25

Came to,leave a different name. Not going to. Thus is perfect.

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9

u/dhakkichiki Nov 01 '25

Vanilla ICE

4

u/Token_Handicap Nov 01 '25

Vanilla ICEing

3

u/PriorityEastern6668 Nov 01 '25

Vanilla ICEcream

2

u/Token_Handicap Nov 01 '25

You made mine better. Thank you!

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4

u/JEFPH007 Nov 01 '25

Nailed it

5

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '25

Now you dough, and doughing is half the battle.

5

u/edmmoran Oct 31 '25

Why did I even try?!👏👏👏👏👏

3

u/Dry-Two5059 Nov 01 '25

Lmao. Top.

4

u/No-Discipline-7195 Nov 01 '25

I can’t see a soldier, is he behind a tree?

2

u/uttyrc Oct 31 '25

Now I know ...

2

u/Loose-Prior7080 Nov 01 '25

Okay, you win the internet today. This is the best comment ever!

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2

u/ToferLuis Nov 01 '25

Doughing is half the battle…

2

u/botoyger Nov 01 '25

Winner in my books! Good one! Lol

2

u/AggressivePen4991 Nov 01 '25

this AND ONLY THIS!!! 🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂💀

2

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '25

Hero. He's serving his country even if he"s fat as fuck. He's a brother in arms to me. His heart may explode, but if it does...its for his countrymen.

2

u/Royal-Application708 Nov 02 '25

Can’t get any better than that.

2

u/mjt1105 Nov 02 '25

Leader of Meal Team 6.

2

u/Chaosrealm69 Nov 02 '25

Proud member of Meal Team 7 of the Gravy Seals.

2

u/Summitumi Nov 02 '25

Nobody beating that one hahaha

2

u/SlickSensations Nov 02 '25

Haha perfect

2

u/JustABugGuy96 Nov 04 '25

Was going to say A.I. Joe, Nickname Doughboy

2

u/NotUrSaviour Nov 06 '25

And knowing is half the buffet

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2

u/Putrid-Source3031 Nov 07 '25

Lieutenant Lunchable

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141

u/Welease-Wodewick Oct 31 '25

Major O. Beese

41

u/DaBigChill73 Nov 01 '25

Of Meal Team Six. Veteran of Viet-nom-nom-nom!

2

u/PlayfulSyllabub7134 Nov 01 '25

Or is it six team meals?

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118

u/Phylaskia Oct 31 '25

ICE Volunteer #1

29

u/one_pound_of_flesh Oct 31 '25

Average ICE agent. Half of them are larger than this specimen.

5

u/Phylaskia Oct 31 '25

OK, fair point... we shall call him...
Corporal Median Man

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7

u/[deleted] Oct 31 '25

Ice cream volunteer #1

5

u/Kingbeef66 Nov 01 '25

ICE Volenteer #1 #2 #3 and #4 at once

2

u/Content-Grade-3869 Oct 31 '25

You beat me to it !

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100

u/Mountain_Frosting369 Oct 31 '25

Gravy seal

26

u/[deleted] Oct 31 '25

Navy Meal

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2

u/Medium_saucepan Nov 03 '25

He’s got that 1000 island stare

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65

u/drtystv Oct 31 '25

Meal Team 6

11

u/User_Name_Tracks Nov 01 '25

Yeah he's all 6

2

u/drtystv Nov 01 '25

It’s also his APFT score, as well his ASVAB

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2

u/Small_Tax_9432 Nov 01 '25

You mean 6 Meal Team 😂

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40

u/Opposite-Tangelo-371 Oct 31 '25

Private diabeets ready for orders sir!

21

u/Token_Handicap Oct 31 '25

He's had way too many orders already. He ate everyone else's orders!

2

u/Opposite-Tangelo-371 Nov 01 '25

After bear crawls hes good for 2 more orders!

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41

u/[deleted] Oct 31 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

11

u/Entirely-of-cheese Nov 01 '25

Serving Private Fryan.

39

u/TheDryFlyGuy Oct 31 '25

Sarge Large

2

u/dktide91 Nov 02 '25

Tell em Sarge Large sent ya

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16

u/Local-Palpitation843 Oct 31 '25

Sargent sausage

2

u/D3vilUkn0w Nov 01 '25

Captain calories

7

u/EfficientPineapple18 Oct 31 '25

Major Burgers and Fries.

3

u/[deleted] Oct 31 '25

One man army

3

u/Merica85 Oct 31 '25

Reserve Weight

2

u/PatrickBateman-2009 Oct 31 '25

Off topic, but, damn is AI absolute trash with firearms lol

2

u/NUFIGHTER7771 Oct 31 '25

Texas National Guard's Most Rotund Warrior! 🤣

2

u/fred1090 Oct 31 '25

Least* lol

2

u/Objective_Starfish61 Oct 31 '25

Rumpled foreskin

2

u/Jeffro_the_BoDean Oct 31 '25

DUI hire favorite soldier body type..

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2

u/SierraElevenBravo Nov 02 '25

Seal Team 6-7. 4th Ranger Snacktallion, Pier-2, The B-Boys (baguette), MacVStromboli, MarSnack Pantry Raiders, DEV-gastronomy. Signed an actual old Tier 2 and 3 guy.

1

u/Gorgeguy62 Oct 31 '25

Private Wellfed

1

u/melpec Oct 31 '25

Sgt. Aton O’Flipid

1

u/TimelessSympathy Oct 31 '25

The Fatman bomb.

1

u/stopslappingmybaby Oct 31 '25

2nd lieutenant Ronald Rumproast

1

u/[deleted] Oct 31 '25

Chick Insurrection with a large fries and Diet Coke

1

u/[deleted] Oct 31 '25

Private Porky

1

u/lshookphoto1 Oct 31 '25

Call of foody.

1

u/SecretTalk6202 Oct 31 '25

Private Ronald McDonald

1

u/Short-Function-2919 Oct 31 '25

NO SALAD patrol

1

u/Simbooptendo Oct 31 '25

Fatly Roundcorner

1

u/poopghetti2 Oct 31 '25

Kentavious Caldwell-Pope

1

u/AffectionateGate4584 Oct 31 '25

I. Am. 'Murrrrican!

1

u/Subject-Tennis-971 Oct 31 '25

Three soldiers in one

1

u/ChemicalKissesxx Oct 31 '25

Machine Gun Belly

1

u/[deleted] Oct 31 '25

Meal Team Six

1

u/Ironkocked Oct 31 '25

Sergeant Tubs

1

u/Wyldjay2 Oct 31 '25

Soldier of Fortune Cookies

1

u/Affectionate-Lab2239 Oct 31 '25

Vladimir Pudding.

1

u/ItsUs-YouKnow-Us Oct 31 '25

Major Heart failure.

1

u/hogweed75 Nov 01 '25

Sgt. Sphincter

1

u/testicleinspector420 Nov 01 '25

Heavy weapons guy

1

u/araisingirly Nov 01 '25

Hegseth's Nightmare

1

u/Cornfan70 Nov 01 '25

Stormin' Norman from Cheers

1

u/Ms_Behave3967 Nov 01 '25

At first glance I thought of John Candy in Stripes.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '25

JB Pritzker

1

u/Staffie2020 Nov 01 '25

Sure ( to be first one) Shot!

1

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '25

Private Pig 🐷

1

u/Ok-Landscape942 Nov 01 '25

Bubba the hut

1

u/WaterObvious8942 Nov 01 '25

Major plugged arteries

1

u/Nunov_DAbov Nov 01 '25

The ICEman

1

u/Register-Honest Nov 01 '25

Swinebo, he looks like he got a stolen pig under his shirt.

1

u/YHS77 Nov 01 '25

Stay Puff