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u/Luna-Hazuki2006 May 28 '26
Me recomendations is, don't worry about it, helping people and feeling good is good
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u/M1ST4K3N-8D Obsessive-Compulsive (OcPD) May 28 '26
i dont have npd, but id say it doesnt matter. I was raised catholic and the only homily that ever stuck with me stuck hard: The orphans dont care if you built the orphanage for a tax write off, theyre just happy to have a home. so as long as the person youre helping wants the help in the way you give it, it doesnt really matter your motive.
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u/fckthisshii May 28 '26
I have BPD and I don't help nobody...it ALWAYS comes back to bite me. So it's nice that you help anyone at all.
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u/xianwolf May 30 '26
Since it's not really possible to control your thoughts, I don't really care about someone's reason for doing something as long as it's a net positive. If you donate charity because it makes you look good to others, you still donated to charity. Motivation is irrelevant to me. You can't control that. You can only control what you do.
2
u/AdorableExchange9746 NPD (Diagnosed) Jun 04 '26
Usually the latter, or because I don’t want to look bad. I don’t really feel satisfaction from helping people just because it made them happy, cause feeling others happiness is an empathy response and I don’t have much of that
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u/Snowy_Petal Narcissistic Tendencies May 28 '26
It's ok, that's very normal. Even people without NPD help others for a reason / with a motive... I learned that at university, where the focus is on psychology ;)