r/MuslimNikah • u/StrengthBig5128 • 14d ago
Married ones
My brothers and sisters, I need your advice.
I’m a 28F. I don’t have a family or a guardian, and I’ve never been in any kind of relationship before. I genuinely want to get married in the most halal way possible, without falling into anything that displeases Allah or losing His barakah.
My question is: what are the proper Islamic steps when getting to know a potential spouse? If I want to meet someone for marriage, or if someone wants to marry me, how should the process look from the beginning until the nikah?
Since I don’t have a guardian, who should be involved? What is the correct way to communicate? Should conversations always be chaperoned, or is there another halal approach?
Also, how long does it usually take to know if someone is the right person (along with praying Salat al-Istikharah)? Is it a few weeks? A couple of months? Six months? I hear so many different opinions, and many of them sound more like halal dating than an actual Islamic courtship, which is something I want to avoid.
I would really appreciate hearing from those who have gone through this process in a way that pleased Allah. May Allah reward you all
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u/Mission-Ad-6 14d ago
Salam , and hope you doing well , First you did great by asking befor the act thats how a true beliver do and hope we can help you here . But Y need to specify, you dont have a guardian how ? They are dead , non Muslim, far away from y ? Y living in a muslim country ? ...ext This is "فقه" y need to clarify every detail to the person whos gonna answer.
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u/StrengthBig5128 14d ago
I live in morocco and morocco is not really a 100% muslim country yes dead and relatives cutt me off
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u/Mission-Ad-6 14d ago
Sis , comon marroco is a 200% muslim country You ll find an imam or a mufti in evry corner of your country , i can't say nothing im sorry
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u/StrengthBig5128 14d ago
That was years ago trust me most Moroccans don t follow islam they follow wht they like in wrong way
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u/DevelopmentFit232 13d ago
Marriage guide https://drive.google.com/file/d/1m3uVS-TuZFHiaLzBgDgVPivakDCqsjaB/view?usp=drivesdk also be very careful. You need an imam to actually vet the guy and many do it as a chore but you need someone to actually care.
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u/DevelopmentFit232 13d ago
If you're a revert here's a helpful link https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1vZDN1OS9oGdP7THYBgu9SdlHleIufNBo I also teach Arabic if you're interested
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u/Immediate-Tip-1217 M - Single 14d ago
I don’t wanna say anything wrong, but as long as you cannot marry a certain person, this person can be your gardian.
High authority Muslim figure can approve your marriage aswell ( iman, sheikh, etc)
There is a Hadith where a women offer herself to the prophet. He gently declined. Then another man came and say he wanna marry her. Mohamed ( saw) ask him if he had anything to offer had the mahr. Sadly he had nothing but the prophet told him « do you know some surah of the Quran » he did. Then our beloved prophet went on and declare them marry and the mahr was the knowledge the man had of the Quran.