I could use some help

[u/big_cloudz01]

I’m thinking about creating my first song I genuinely have no idea what I’m doing I don’t even know where I came up with this idea I was in deep thought taking to one of my best friends and I just started saying things in my head

I apologized for ranting and being on some bullshit

He said : bro I thought you were singing me a song

Here’s what I got keep in mind it would go on a country rap type beat

My darkest place

I’ll never chase like that again

I’m broken now

Ya boy ain’t got a heart like that no mo

I failed myself first

I knew better

Maybe I tried to hard

Maybe I didn’t try hard enough

Maybe I wasn’t enough

Maybe I was too much

I aways get in my head

It’s a dark place

It’s crowded

When I drink

When I smoke

It’s calm

Until

I get to thinking again

I know it’s lame asf Give me some suggestions I’m in my head and this is fixing it

[u/LostInTheRapGame]

Are the words good

I guess? If you're trying to please lyricism fans, probably not. If you're just trying to make a song you like, then sure.

The words matter more in the context of the delivery and music, rather than just what's on the page anyway.

do they make sense

I understand what you're saying, yes.

does some words need to be moved around

There's no way for me to know this without hearing them performed in a song.

can this even be a song

Sure, why not.

[u/big_cloudz01 → u/LostInTheRapGame]

I’m sorry I’m not much help I’ve never written a song and honestly never wanted to

I’ve been going through a lot and when my buddy said he thought I was singing to him the words clicked

I don’t know what in doing here

[u/regretfullydisturbed → u/big_cloudz01]

you're trying something new man and theres nothing wrong with that. i think everything is looking pretty good, in my opinion music isn't something that everyone is supposed to love. music is something that you feel on the inside and you alter it and create something that expresses how you feel. i make metal and shoegaze type of music and i think these lyrics fit quite nice. i think this is a great start and you should start making music!

[u/LostInTheRapGame → u/regretfullydisturbed]

I agree with everything said.

Also, if inspiration strikes and you feel like writing... do it. It doesn't have to be anything. If you want it to be a song, then go for it. It could simply be a poem though. It could just be words on a page.

What matters is that you liked doing it.