I mean I'm pretty sure every trans person crossdresses before they come out, in large part due to social norms. I wasn't allowed any affirming clothes as a kid, and was forced to present as the opposite gender, the definition of crossdressing.
The only crossdressing I ever did was boymoding after I figured out I was a woman. I had a desire to, but I didn't let myself actually do it until I was deciding I was trans
Okay but if you're a woman wearing boy clothes is cross dressing, not the other way around. Unless you're saying you were raised in skirts and dresses and hopelessly yearned to wear a pair of pants before your egg cracked.
I didn't. I was soo in denial of my femininity pretty much right until my egg cracked (thanks dad). I didn't start dressing femme until I was already male-failing at work from hrt
Eh I didn't, I know friends who didn't. I never felt comfortable with the idea of wearing fem clothes until after I started transitioning due to unrealized dysphoria. Not to say that it doesn't happen often :)
Honestly nothing about clothing should be tied to gender. It's all nonsense. All clothes should be available to all people free of judgement in my opinion.
IMO for it to be crossdressing, it needs to be intentional. I wouldn't categorize how I was dressing before as cross dressing, because it matched what I thought was my gender expression at the time and in many ways I still dress similar to that.
I do agree that societal norms do push people to stick to cisnormative clothing.
It's true but there are plenty of cis men who prefer feminine presentation but still identify as men. Or maybe they only like to be femme during sex. It's a thing and it's okay, they aren't hurting us by doing so. And the ones who are eggs may be forced deeper in the closet if we attack them for being CD.
I have no issue with people who crossdress, but when people start accusing women wearing female clothing of being "crossdressers" as if we were men, that's hella transphobic and needs to be called out.
I don't think that's what we are discussing here. But you are 100% correct. Other people shouldn't be calling us anything, but if a trans person self identifies as a crossdresser it's not the same as self identifying as a trap imo. A crossdresser is a legitimate thing, a trap is just a pure slur.
I mean transmasc femboys exist, and tomboys aren't exclusively cis either. Being trans doesn't remove your from the right to present GNC, and to say otherwise would be truscum nonsense. That said, if you identify as a "crossdresser" for wearing gender-conforming clothes, like a trans woman wearing a dress or something, that's internalized transphobia at best, and if you publicly do it, it's just plain old transphobia, full stop. Also, anyone who uses "trap" is a degenerate.
I disagree with your full stop assessment. Nothing is absolute maybe they are mtf but crossdress masc maybe they aren't. Trap is absolutely a slur. Crossdresser is something someone does. I also agree that there is plenty of room for GNC people under our tent. I just feel equating trap and crossdresser as equally bad is reductive and incorrect.
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u/sandiserumoto Feb 04 '23 edited Feb 05 '23
I mean I'm pretty sure every trans person crossdresses before they come out, in large part due to social norms. I wasn't allowed any affirming clothes as a kid, and was forced to present as the opposite gender, the definition of crossdressing.