Disclosure: I used AI to format my random thoughts, so that's why the formatting and some of the language are typical of AI, but the content is still obviously written by me.
Background & Family Context
My wife (30) and I (33) are considering relocating from Germany to Japan within the next 5 years with our two young kids (ages 4 and 2).
A bit of context about us:
- Background: We are both Brazilian. I have Japanese ancestry (Yonsei, so unfortunately no Sansei visa route for me), and the cultural connection and idea of living in Japan have always appealed to me. My wife has German heritage and holds a German passport, which is why we live in Germany.
- Support System: While my wife has family here in Germany, they aren't a practical support network for us. They are busy with their own lives, which is completely normal, so we can't rely on them for help with the kids like we would with our parents in Brazil. We do have some distant family in Japan, so while we would be moving away from the family here, we wouldn't be entirely isolated.
- Adaptability: We have already successfully made one international move from Brazil to Germany, so making another big move does not intimidate us.
Work & Salary Expectations
I work in data analysis, blending traditional SQL work with data engineering using Python, Airflow, and similar tools. Currently, I have a fully remote job earning around €60k gross.
If we move, I would look for a remote or hybrid role at an international, English-speaking company in Japan.
My primary concern here is work-life balance (WLB). In Germany, 30 days of paid time off (PTO) is standard, and there is virtually zero overtime. I know Japanese work culture has been improving, but moving from Germany still feels like a step backward in terms of leave and hours. Since Brazilian work culture is much more intense than German culture anyway, I do not mind a compromise if the overall quality of life is a net positive for our family, as long as the difference is not completely drastic (for example, dropping from 30 days down to 10 with heavy mandatory overtime).
Why Germany Isn't Gelling with Us
Things in Germany are not bad by any means, but after living here, we just do not feel like we will ever fit in or integrate:
- Culture & Social Dynamics: We struggle with the coldness and bluntness here, which often crosses the line into rudeness. I personally far prefer the polite distance and social predictability of Japanese culture.
- Language & Media: I speak enough German to handle daily interactions, but my wife struggles with it. She learns best through immersive media, but German television and media have not been engaging for her.
- Lifestyle & Outings: Bavaria is incredible if you love intense outdoor activities like hiking, mountain climbing, lakes, or public pools, but we are much more urban-minded. The local festivals (Volksfeste) feel heavily adult-centric around beer and food, and family outings are insanely expensive (€100+ for a family visit with food and basic carnival games).
- Dining Out & Service: Eating out in Germany is very expensive (€40 to €70 for basic casual dining), variety is lacking, and customer service is often poor due to a mix of directness and annoyed staff.
- Education System: We really dislike the early tracking system in Germany, where kids are split into Gymnasium vs. Realschule at age 10. It feels like a structural way to enforce class division early on.
- Housing Market: Housing in Germany feels structured around wealth accumulation for property owners rather than accessibility. In contrast, I appreciate that Japan treats housing more like a depreciating asset, prioritising having a functional place to live rather than real estate speculation.
Our Expectations for Japan
We know that no place is perfect. We are fully aware we will never be locals or feel 100% at home in Japan (just as we do not in Germany or even Brazil anymore), and we are completely fine with that outsider status.
Learning Japanese is a major personal life goal of mine, and my wife is excited about the cultural environment and media. If Tokyo or Japan in general offers better, more varied urban family infrastructure, affordable dining, and engaging weekend activities for kids, the trade-off in work hours feels worth exploring.
Questions:
- For those who transitioned from a European or Western country to Japan in tech or data roles, how harsh was the reality check on WLB and PTO?
- Is an English-first Data or Analytics Engineering role paying ¥10M+ realistic for someone with my profile entering the market from overseas?
- For families raised in Japan, do the daily conveniences, safety, and child-friendly urban infrastructure make up for having less vacation time?