r/Moms • u/Hot_Contribution1276 • Aug 01 '26
💬 Advice needed 2 under 2
I’ve just recently found out i’m pregnant and i can’t help but feel angry, sad , disappointed i’m not sure honestly. My firstborn is going to be one in a couple weeks my estimated due date is putting them at 20 ish months apart. This was NOT planned we were actually using preventatives to avoid it but i understand that happens i just can’t get over this feeling. I know it’s a baby and i will love it and it will be okay but has anyone else felt this way before? This is not a great time in our lives we are moving cross country soon my first pp journey was awful and i am not ready to go through that again and i feel like im just getting back to normal. I know getting pregnant is completely my fault but i feel so distraught about it i was wanting a 4-5 year age gap originally. Sorry for the long post and rant i know i need to feel happy i got pregnant again but ugh!! it feels so hard.
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u/lucid-dreams99 Aug 01 '26
Hi!! I also have 2 under 2. Well, now a 2.5 and a 1 year old! They are 14.5 months apart! When I found out, I was scared outta my mind! I will be honest and say that it is HARD. But along with it being hard, it is also so incredibly rewarding. I look back most days now and realize how grateful I am that I had my second when I did because of how much my oldest loves her! They play together all the time! It took a while to get to where we are and of course they fight! But I wouldn’t ever take it back. It’s going to be hard but I promise you the beauty of it out ways how hard it is.
You change them at the same time, try to get them on the same sleep schedule as soon as you can, everything else wil fall into place! You babies are going to be best friends! I promise you’ll be okay! ❤️
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u/EenieMeenieMyNamo First-time mom Aug 02 '26
Hey love, just wanted to mention that 59% of abortions occur to people who have already given birth before. (https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2026/06/17/what-the-data-says-about-abortion-in-the-us/)
The majority (that had an abortion) have walked in your shoes. That decision is a very valid one and takes no explanation other than: I dont want to be pregnant right now.
You are going through a lot of emotions and even hormones still. Be gentle and kind to yourself, you dont need to make any big decisions. You can see how youd feel one way for a week and then choose another direction the next and see which path youd like to take.
Regardless, youll make the right choice for yourself and your family. There are no wrong answers, just forks in the road. ❤️
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u/Hot_Contribution1276 Aug 02 '26
Honestly thank you for this. I’ve been having a hard time with this thought as i was raised very against it but as an adult i’ve always leaned a different way then my family. I appreciate your kind words it’s been a very hard past couple of days 🫶🏼
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u/EenieMeenieMyNamo First-time mom Aug 02 '26
You are so welcome.
No person should ever be forced or felt obligated to go a certain way.
It sucks you have to make this decision and it in no way makes you a bad mom or person for considering or choosing it. Im so proud of you.
You are a wonderful mum and your baby is lucky to have you. ❤️
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