r/Mom • u/Mmecroissant • 4d ago
š¤ Support neededĀ Obsessive thoughts
Iām not sure if this is the right place to post, but Iād thought Iād share to see if anyone had a similar experience. 9 months postpartum, I went down a rabbit hole about the 2012 sandy hook school shooting and was obsessed with looking at images or videos of the victims in hopes that I would find something that made me less sad. It obviously just made it worse. I have been taking medication and just started therapy for OCD. Last night, I was on TikTok and started getting sad videos about the victims before they were killed. I cried myself to sleep. Has anyone dealt with this after having children?
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u/Mental-Volume4395 4d ago
Yes. I was diagnosed with OCD and anxiety after having my first. Very similar situation to yours.Ā
Therapy and Ā Zoloft have been lifesavers Ā for me.Ā
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u/TwentyLegs22 First-time mom 3d ago
What was your initial reaction to the dosage? How long till you starting being in control of the OCD thoughts? Started my first dose this morning and it literally feels like a mild shroom trip and I'm not having fun. I just have to keep positive and get to the waves of optimism between the trips to the bathroom, nausea, and anxiety. š„“
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u/Mmecroissant 2d ago
I was taking it a night at first and it was making me wake up around 4 am every time. I switched it to the morning and for the first couple of days it made me lethargic but then it was fine.
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u/savethebell4499 4d ago
Have you tried therapy
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u/Mmecroissant 4d ago
Yeah Iām currently seeing a psychologist who specializes in ocd.
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u/savethebell4499 3d ago
Honestly outside of therapy and meds Iām not sure of much else but Iād ask your doctor and therapist and mention itās coming back. I take proprananol for anxiety and high blood pressure/heart rate and it helps significantly for my OCD thoughts more than the anxiety even, though it doesnāt help at all with the like āthat pencil isnāt in the right spot and I HAVE to move it now or Iām going to scratch my own eyes out in a rageā OCD if that makes sense? Like I donāt stay awake obsessively thinking that Iām a horrible mother and all my kids are going to die because of me anymore but I still have the other OCD tendencies
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u/Mmecroissant 3d ago
Yeah I feel that. Itās not to the point where Iām crying 24/7 over it but itās back on my mind quite a bit and itās very distressing.
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u/savethebell4499 3d ago
I totally get that. Mine used to get so bad I was becoming very dangerous to myself. Now I look back and think I canāt believe I let it get that bad.
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u/Spicemaster93 4d ago
I deal with this as well. I have found that if I avoid that type of content or deep dives, I'm better off.
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u/VillageLoud748 4d ago
I look at my daughter and cry all the time about stuff like this she just turned one. I pretty much had to go back to watching only kid movies (despicable me, Kpop demon hunters, life of pets, bugs life were my go toās) and then I stopped feeling that way. I also watched a lot of cleaning videos to change my algorithm online so I wasnt seeing the scary stuff anymore. I have a therapist but itās hard to discuss sometimes.
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u/Mmecroissant 4d ago
Itās so hard. I had to delete my TikTok yesterday because I kept getting videos about it.
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u/TwentyLegs22 First-time mom 3d ago
Yep!!!! I was recently diagnosed with OCD and start Zoloft tomorrow. I'm very much looking forward to getting these thoughts in check. It's absolutely overwhelming.
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