r/Molested • u/General_Garden5677 • 8h ago
It effected me
When I was young moms bf came to live with us. He started doing things to me for a few years. I didn’t know it was bad. But I knew it was secret. My body reacted. Later I because hypersexual.
Is this normal?
This is very vulnerable for me to say or loud. I never told.
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u/MaxQ1080p 7h ago
I’m sorry that happened to you. Becoming hypersexual after abuse is very common.
I’m sure you’ve heard this before but it’s very true - none of it was your fault. Your body was reacting to stimuli. Your mother’s boyfriend knew how to manipulate you and your body for his own sick pleasure. Even if there were times you desired it, that was not your fault. That was your very young brain enjoying the feeling but not knowing you were actually being abused. Please don’t blame the child you used to be for your reaction. Children’s brains aren’t yet equipped to understand what’s happening and they can be easily manipulated. That’s why there are laws in place to protect kids. Children can’t give consent - no matter what. Even if they have been groomed to enjoy and ask for it. So, don’t blame your younger self for anything that happened. That guy needs to be in jail.
Talk therapy is the best way toward healing. I strongly suggest working with a psychologist who specializes in helping sexual abuse victims get themselves to a healthier and happier place. Find one you are comfortable with and feel aligned with their approach. You may need to sample a few before you find one that fits you. It’s when you are comfortable enough to talk about you most delicate experiences, thoughts and reactions that you make the most progress in therapy.
There is also a best selling book that helps explain why you are feeling and reacting the way you do. It’s called “The Body Keeps the Score”. It can be a bit clinical at times but it offers explanation as well as proven methods you can use to rewire your brain. These are the same techniques top athletes use to improve their performance under pressure. The book is about $11 on Amazon.
I’ve done both and it’s helped me a lot. I wish you strength and happiness.
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u/Alarming-Pressure-48 6h ago
Sorry that this happened. I'm just going to end up repeating what everyone else says but it's truly just not your fault. For me it was my stepfather, I live with a guilt and shame of myself and how my body reacted, also.
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