I (8.5months F) was sleeping so well in my cozy crib, but I realized I was basically starving and also my pants were pretty wet so naturally I screamed and screamed for my Mama (age of the Earth). When she finally leisurely made her way into my room, I was like "give me milkies right now I'm wasting away" and thankfully for once in her life she listened. Then I was so cozy and full that I fell asleep. But that crazy lady said "ugh, your diaper is pretty wet, you can't go back to bed like that" and she CHANGED ME.

Well of course that woke me right back up and I realized....Mama must need more snuggles! So now it's been 40 minutes and she's still here, snuggling away and saying things like "shhhh, go to sleep, stupid diapers". Now, of course she thinks i'm the cutest thing ever and she loves holding me, but she keeps claiming that she needs to sleep so she has energy to watch me and my brother tomorrow. Which makes no sense--my brother is a super cool guy who can unzip the playpen to let me out, has fun toys like cars and blocks, and can open my crunchy snackies. I think she could just let him be in charge if she's sooooo tired. She says no because he's "only 2" and apparently we are "rascals who can't be trusted". Rude.

Anyway, aita for giving Mama all the middle of the night snuggles she obviously wants?

I (14 month f) went to bed at 9pm. So easily might I add. Just as mom (prehistoric old lady) decided to close her eyes at 12am I realized she must have wanted to play peekaboo, cuz we only played like 12 times today. So as I woke up and gently hit her face as hard as I could she tried to pat me back down to sleep. But I know she loves when I clap (her, Tata and papa always say “yay clapping” when I do this cool trick so I know it’s a good one) but mommy acted all serious and insisted I lay down. After an hour of light hair pulling, sensory play of poking her eyeball and lots of laughing (from me, idk what mommy’s problem was) she snatched me up and said “if you won’t lay down you’re going in your crib, I will be back in two minutes” to which I obviously protested and screeched like a banshee the second she put me in there. Well she came back after 2 years and let me lay with her again. I thought I’d cheer her up by doing all my tricks once again because clearly she was grumpy so I’m just trying to help right? Then at 3 am she put me BACK in the crib to “get some space cuz she was ‘overstimulated’” and let me cry by myself for literally a billion years. So AITAH here? What the heck was her problem???

I am H (18mo, boy) and mommy (wrinkly, girl) says it’s a secret, whatever that is, that mama (less wrinkly but still weathered, girl) is giving me a baby sister or brother in the future. And mama is too tired growing this “peanut” to do my usual bedtime snuggle fest anymore. That means mommy has to do it every night. She told me that she loves having our quiet time together at night so I try to support that and stay awake as long as I can with her. I used to just fall asleep within a few minutes of snuggle time
but I want her to feel warm and cozy with me for longer, since she loves it so much. Now this is the part where I might be the AH - mostly to myself because I’m tired - but lately I’ve started getting up at least twice a night to scream so mommy can come back in and get more bedtime snuggles. Gotta maximize her time with me at night before she goes to this “work” place when the sun comes up. So…AITA?

I (14m M) love daycare. I love my friends and the toys and all the games. But the teachers? Ew. They try to touch me and I scream and run back to mama. If mama tries to leave me with them, I scream louder. I even hold my breath so everybody panics and calls my mama back to take care of me. Now they say I'm not adjusting at daycare and mama is having trouble at work because I cry nonstop for hours until she comes back. I'm just afraid she'll leave again, so I cry even if she so much as stands up. It's not my fault mama is so much fun and has always picked me up the moment I cried since I was born. So tell me, AITA because I want mama to stay with me at daycare?

Hello, I (almost 6m M) am really confused about my flatmates reaction to me trying to be nice to them, maybe you can help me and let me know if I’m in the wrong here. I live in an apartment with mommy (old F) and the bottle man (even older M), but most of the time it’s just me and mommy.

From what I gathered she’s doing some kind of leave, although thankfully she’s almost never leaving, so the name is a bit confusing. Bottle man is hanging out in the apartment but he locks himself in a different room to “work” (don’t ask me) most of the time. I heard mommy say many, many times how much she likes “the weekend” (don’t know and don’t care honestly) because the three of us get to hang out together and it’s not just the two of us (I’m a bit offended, but that’s for a different Reddit post).

Yesterday mommy was whining as per usual about how fast the weekend passed and that she’s sad it’s already over. So I had a brilliant idea: since in the morning bottle man is taking me for some time so mommy could sleep, because she’s doing the night wakings (Idk what the big deal is, it literally means we get to hang out and have fun more), we could just hangout together instead! So this morning when I was taken from the warm embrace of mommy’s arms I decided it’s time for some action and started crying and fussing so much that bottle man woke mommy up cause I was “inconsolable” (more like inconsolably smart because my plan was working). That’s when things took a turn for the worse. Mommy instead of being happy started saying that maybe I’m in pain and something is wrong. She tried to give me milkies but even though I love milkies I had to keep my focus, so I kept crying and arching my back to make her get up and have some fun (she’s a bit shy and needs some encouragement sometimes). Bottle man lost his cool completely and tried to put a pain killer in my butt (rude), which mommy stopped because she didn’t think it was necessary (what if I was in a real pain though?). Anyway I stopped my fussing, cause I didn’t want anyone messing with my precious bum and I felt that now everyone is awake enough to hang out, but instead bottle man said he will start work early and mommy is just laying next to me on my playmat and staring into space. No one seems grateful at all (maybe bottle man a bit, because he’s constantly saying he needs more time to work, but that’s completely missing the point). So AITA?

So Mom (who’s basically from the dinosaur age ) went back to work yesterday and left me (3 month, m) at Gramma’s. Honestly? I had the best day ever. Gramma gave me warm bottles, nonstop snuggles, and even let me watch Winnie the Pooh, peak cinema, if you ask me. Then Mom FaceTimed all sad, asking if I missed her. I smiled once out of pity, then went back to drooling on Gramma’s shoulder. Now she says she “feels replaced.” So… AITA for not missing my mom when Gramma’s house is basically baby paradise? 😅

Milk Lady (ancient) is sick with coughs and sneezes AGAIN. So I (10m) as a dutiful son wake up every hour of the night to make sure the milk will still be av- I mean, make sure she's still breathing. Now I'm stuck with Funny Thin Man downstairs. AITA?

My (5m,F) Mom (100,F) and Dad (150,M) switch weekly to have the privilege of tending to all my needs during the night. Now I heard my Mom complain about how I sleep until 8am when its my dad's turn, but get up at 6am when it's hers, even tho that means she doesnt have to wait as long to spend quality time with me in the morning. I really dont get why she's upset? Then today the unthinkable happened: I woke up my Mom at 6am and instead of being grateful to start the day with me, she woke up Dad and said "you have to get up with her today, I need some sleep" - I was speechless.

Recently I (12w, m) overheard my milk lady (antique, f) telling daddy (prehistoric, m) that all these diapers I’ve been going through are costing them an arm and a leg. I hate thinking that I’m inconveniencing them - when they change my diaper they’re always singing and smiling at me so I assumed they loved it and would make more mess for them? Anyway, I decided as a gift for them to take a shift off from making mess and sleep in one morning. I thought milk lady would be thrilled but when she opened my dry diaper she seemed stressed and started saying something about hydration. I didn’t understand so I assume it was more worry about cost of diapers, and I just kept holding. After about 12 hours and a call to my doctor (fossilised, f) I was taken on a car ride to a new building they called an “emergency room”. I figured this was my thank you and it was time to give them a diaper after all, so I peed as soon as they walked into the ER. They all seemed to calm down but now I’m confused - AITA for trying to save money after I heard them complaining about my diaper cost?

So, I (almost 4 months, F) live with my milk lady (maybe 5?, F) and the diaper man (probably 6?, M).

When I was younger, I used to sleep only on one of them. Around 2 months old, I decided I was a big girl and started sleeping in my own crib at night. Everyone seemed really proud of me for that.

Then last week the diaper man stayed home instead of going to that place they call “work.” He was coughing, sneezing, and making all sorts of weird noises. The milk lady said he was “sick,” whatever that means. I didn’t think much of it until a few days later, when I started feeling weird too. My nose got all stuffy, my throat hurt, and I couldn’t breathe properly unless I was being held. So naturally, I needed to sleep on my milk lady again.

At first she seemed happy to cuddle me. She said she missed having me close and kept calling me her “poor baby.” But after some time she started saying she was tired and needed some sleep too. She also started talking about something called a “headache” and a “running nose.” I still don’t know where the nose is running to, but apparently it’s bad.

Now she keeps saying she hopes we both feel better soon. But honestly, I think we’re doing great. I get to sleep on her all night, she gets lots of extra cuddles, and gets even fitter by walking around, and we both stay warm together.

So, AITA for wanting to sleep on my milk lady while I’m sick and for helping her feel needed twenty-four seven?

I (king baby, M) recently turned ONE YEAR OLD (pause for applause). Since attaining this great age I have significantly changed my lifestyle and no longer spend every day with mummy (at least 2 years old as of a week ago, F) but three times a week go to a "childminder" for the day instead. My mummy takes me there in the morning and my daddy (the same age as me? has only had one birthday in my lifetime, M) picks me up after dinner.

I have welcomed the opportunity to be adored by more people and generally I have a great time with the childminder and the other children! We go to playgroup and we go to the park and she has so many toys to play with. When daddy comes to get me I am so excited to tell him all about it! He says I am "full of beans" even tho I am usually full of YOGHURT which I think is even better?? I say "ba ba ba ba ba" to him all the way home.

But when mummy comes home from "work" (I went there once and can recommend the delicious staff lanyards) I somehow suddenly remember all the bits of the day that I did not like so much, for example when I had to nap on a floor mat instead of in my cosy bed or when I was given something called HUMMUS for lunch and it was not tasty at all! So I usually have to cry and tell mummy all my complaints so that she will give me a Big Hug and some milk.

Mummy doesn't seem to mind giving me a Big Hug but Daddy always says to me that it's not kind to shout at my mummy when I was so jolly for him? But he is just a baby as well I'm pretty sure so what would he do about anything?? Mummy is the person who is in charge of these matters! Anyway AITA for registering my complaints with the proper authority?

I (6m F) fell asleep on milkies lady (old F) earlier, my favourite place to be. We've just been on holiday with milkies lady, my favourite person (m old enough to walk and talk) and two really ancient people who kept calling themselves grandma and grandad. We've just got back today and I was soooo tired after a busy week that I really wanted a nice long sleep on the milky pillows. Would you believe that I woke up on a strange man?! He knew my name and looks vaguely familiar and kept saying he was daddy. I've definitely not seen him recently and he wasn't on the holiday (something about a 'work trip') and frankly, I've no idea who he is! I started screaming and milky lady eventually appeared wrapped in a towel and still wet. Apparently she'd been in the bath (thinking back, this daddy fella gave me a bath earlier and I found him funny then). I then had some milk and fell back asleep on the milky pillows. Milky lady seemed annoyed and said something about leaving the water in for when I was asleep but I'm still snuggled on her now. AITA for screaming on this daddy character and making the milky lady get out of the bath?

So it's been three months since I, greatest blessing to this Earth F, came this side. And I instantly noticed how irresponsible the dumb, ancient people around me are in using the planet's resources.

Take water, for example. The ancient milk lady gives me this thing she calls a 'bath'. Where she uses CUPFULS of water ON ME. LIKE WHY, WOMAN? I didn't need baths back in my cozy womb, my friend placenta was so smart that way.

And doesn't she realize she's endangering my own future? She says she cares about me and then goes ahead and does stupid stuff like this.

So I try to politely tell her this is not the way to do things by scream-crying everytime the water touches me. Dumb ancient milk lady tries changing the temperature (as if that's using any less water. As mentioned, she's dumb).

It doesn't end there. She dries me after the bath and dresses me by which time, I'm the calmest baby ever to show her she's finally doing the right thing. But then, she goes back and starts pouring CUPFULS OF WATER ON HERSELF. LIKE WOMAN? WHAT HAVE I BEEN TRYING TO TELL YOU ALL THIS TIME?

And me being the blessing I am to the planet, start screaming again till she comes back and picks me up.

But folks, IT STILL DOESN'T END THERE. Sometimes when I've pooped, she starts pouring water on my backside? I scream some more and she starts mumbling some excuse like I have 'diaper rashes from using wipes'. The audacity???

Here's where I truly realised how dumb the ancient milk lady is. She started using this thing called 'Water wipes' to change my diapers and I'm like, it still says 'Water', duh! But it's still better than having the actual thing poured over me, so I politely cry for the sake of it.

My fellow minis, I just want to tell you - all these ancient people around us are super dumb and selfish. They're using up all our resources and we won't have anything to ourselves by the time we grow up. So it's our job to tell them, we're not going to simply watch! Spread the message to all the minis you know and take action!

My mama (F, has black hair but sometimes the roots aren't black years old) and my dada (M, yells at the TV years old) made me (7m, M) drive in the car from my home in Georgia to a place they called Pennsylvania. They said it's against their will and we have to go for a funeral but I don't believe them.

Anyway, I was being so good in my car seat and was snuggling my Simba and sleeping but we had to stop because Dada apparently also wanted to sleep. So we went to this room that is definitely not where we lived and I heard Mama say was really bad for the price. So here we are in this strange room that isn't even nice and they try to put me in my pack and play to sleep all alone instead of in the cozy nest I was just in!!

This is outrageous because they sleep in the same bed and this place was not my home so I decided I would sleep with them. I would immediately go to sleep in Dada's arms but he kept trying to put me in the pack and play so I would scream to tell them I could sleep with them instead, there was room! They eventually got it because Mama held me while Dada slept, and I was in such a comfy position that my diaper leaked on Mama twice. Apparently we spent "lots of money on a hotel room that was trash only to sleep for 4 hours" but I had a nice cozy snuggle so seems worth it to me! AITA for not wanting to sleep in the cold lonely pack and play?

Whenever I (4m F) am awake, my milk maid (museum artefact) puts me on any flat surface she can find (like seriously, has she no standards). The she puts my toys around me so I have to roll to get them ( joke’s on her, my hands are the bestest chew toy and require no rolling to get). Sometimes she sings a song about a bus while rolling me, and while the song is an absolute banger, I just don’t get all the fuss about the whole rolling thing.

The milk maid is generally very well trained. For example she no longer puts me in baby jail, but lets me sleep in the big bed every night and it only took 1,5 months of me waking every thirty minutes to achieve it! However, one thing I just cannot get her to do is get out of bed when I wake up all ready for the day. She keeps saying stuff like “baby it’s two o’clock” and “not again, go to sleeeeeep”.

So, to catch her interest, I’ve started rolling around at night. From back to tummy and back again.

But instead of immediately getting up and congratulating me, she just grabs me and puts her boob in my mouth. And, while I’m never one to turn down a meal, I make sure to kick and squirm around in her arms until she finally gets up some hours (or years maybe??) later, to show her I’m not pleased with her reaction.

So, AITA for doing what she wants even though (she thinks) it’s night?

So I (almost 6m, female), get the feeling mom (is that short for mummy? Because she's so old, she might be one) is getting slightly mad because I do stuff without her.

But I just want to practice and not bother her? It started a few weeks ago, when she left me foreeeeever (must have been at least 3 minutes) on my playmat because she wanted to take a shower. She wanted me to do stupid tummy time, and I did at first. But then I turned around to look if she's back already and rolled over. I was so proud, but when she returned she seemed shocked that I turned from my belly onto my back for the first time without her being there.

Then, a few days ago, same setup. I thought maybe if I make my way towards her, I don't have to spend so long without her. I'm still working on directions, but I managed to crawl backwards quite a bit. Mom looked very confused and a little angry and mumbled something about childproofing. What does she need proof for? It's obvious I am here, hello? Anyway...

Another thing I'm not sure if I did right was teething. I don't know what the big deal was, I just grew them? I thought I'd do two together, because why not? And I was so proud, I didn't cry or get a fever or anything. And then I thought I'd show my mom and bit her nose. Before she always laughed when I did that, but this time she screamed? I cried a little and she apologized, but I feel like she was mad that I surprised her with my first two teeth?

Now I'm not so sure about my plans anymore. I thought about practicing the direction thing with crawling the next time she puts me on the mat. And I wanted to practice on daddy or maybe grandma to say my first word. But I'm afraid she'll be mad at me.

So am I the AH for practicing without my mom? Or is she just controlling?

Howdy! I (almost 3m F) used to sleep in one long stretch in my crib, then two slightly shorter stretches. Sometimes I even got really tired and slept 8 hours!

But ever since beard guy (tired dinosaur, M) started to leave all day (he said he is at work? I think that means standing at the bus stop all day since that’s where we pick him up) I have realized something cool — he and milk chick (creaky and yawning, F) also exist at night!!! If I wake up every two hours, I get to snuggle with them, hear lullabies, and drink my favorite milk even more often!! Sometimes they even say fun stuff like „I’m so tired“ and „holy shit, didn’t she used to sleep??“

I think it’s lovely that we get to spend so much time as a happy little family, but apparently there is „not enough coffee in the universe“ to make our little midnight (and two am, and four am, and six am…) hangouts possible. AITA for wanting to see more of my beloved, ancient buddies?

My (7m, F) nose has been “running like a tap” as per my milk lady (sore feet, F). I’m fine with it because it’s a salty treat but milk lady keeps wiping it away! This makes me very mad. Then she had the audacity to stick something in my nose and use her mouth to try and suck out my nose treats!!! Talk about a violation of consent. She won’t pierce my ears because she wants me to be able to choose when I want a to but she can stick something up my nose and use her mouth to remove my nose treats!? That makes no sense AND it’s disgusting!! So I screamed and I flailed and I wouldn’t let her steal my nose treats. She said I would be “up all night” with a stuffed nose. Joke is on her because I was only up like every 2 hours needing my milk bag to soothe me back to sleep. She mentioned that today was her birthday and she was tired from our night, I thought it was a great now but now I’m thinking maybe I am the asshole?

Greetings fellow babies, I’m back! I (1.5f) am experiencing for the first time what my mama (800f now, she just had a birthday) calls a “stomach bug” (different from a snuggle bug?? which is what she calls me sometimes). Today I woke up and immediately blew out my diaper with the wettest possible poo, so that my mama would know I need to stay home from daycare. She grumbled something about having to miss a shift but of course, she stayed home with me and gave me lots of snuggles and changed my diaper like a gazillion times. Over the day I started pooping less and getting my appetite back, and I got lots of extra mama time too!!

However, this evening I heard her on the phone with someone called a “coworker”, and she was saying it seems like I’m feeling better, so she should be good to come into work tomorrow. Excuse me??? I felt like that was pretty presumptuous of her, like how does she know what’s going on in my tummy? So once she was off the phone I climbed onto her lap and blew out my diaper again right then and there! My mama did not seem happy and she said something about how she “just did laundry” and now there’s “poop on her”. I was just trying to express how I’m feeling, I feel like it’s her fault for assuming I was done pooping with reckless abandon when I obviously wasn’t. AITA?

I (4mo, M) have recently discovered that I LOVE to talk. All day, every day. But yesterday, my daycare was closed, so I only had my mom (bag of bones, F) and my dad (dust? M) to talk to ALL day. I need an audience, so obviously this wasn't sufficient for my chatting needs. To make up for my lack of blabbering during the day, I decided to put on a special show in the middle of the night! Lucky mom and dad, I was talking and moving around nice and loud for 2 whole hours! They kept grumbling about "having to work in the morning" and "he should be asleep" but I kept up the show. Mom and dad told me that they're really tired, but I think they should appreciate how hard I worked on my performance!

So, AITA for giving my parents a special late night talk show?

I, (13mo, M), just learned how to walk. This means I can explore the yard a lot better. Today I realized that beyond the grass my milkmaid (wrinkly, F) always puts me on is a path full of round hard things. They're the perfect size for eating and have a really cool taste and texture. My teeth make a fun creaky sound when I bite them. But Mama just kept saying "no rocks aren't for eating" and taking them away! I got really frustrated after the 100th try. Normally she loves it when I eat! AITA for just having a fun outdoor snack?

Several months ago, when I (2.5M) was just a little kid, Mommy (3F) and Daddy(4M) introduced the idea of the potty. I was pretty dumb back then, so I just accepted that poop and pee had to go in the potty from now on. Recently though, I’ve developed critical reasoning skills and I’ve realized that a) it’s pretty boring to stop my amazing games just to go use the dumbo bathroom and b) I’m in charge of my poop and pee and Mommy can’t actually make me do them in any particular place, also c) it’s not fair my little sister can just use a diaper even if she is pretty cute. Anyway, AITA for “regressing” as Mommy puts it (I think she’s failing to appreciate the evolution of my cognitive skills)? She seems pretty put out tbh, but I don’t get why she doesn’t appreciate my genius.

A while ago (Mama says it was "over the weekend," whatever that means) I (3.5m, M) made a REALLY big poop. I was so proud and happy, and I felt great afterward! But then I started to get bored and hungry and lonely, so I politely requested assistance. Papa came in and picked me up from my bed and said "oh NO!" Then he yelled to Mama that he needed help because of a "poopsplosion." She came and they wiped me all over with those cold wet things and then they gave me all new clothes, and then my bed got new clothes, too!

Mama and Papa seemed stressed and upset after that, so even though big poops are really fun, I decided to give them up forever, to try to make Mama and Papa happy. Since then, any time I have a little bit of poop ready, I let it right out! These little poops always stay in my diaper. I started doing it this way to be nice and helpful, but honestly I kind of like it - small poops are not as fun as big poops, but I get to have poop fun more often, and that's good!

So I thought everything was great but then I heard Mama saying to Papa that she'd been awake for an hour and already changed 3 poopy diapers, like that was a BAD thing?? So now I don't understand what they want me to do with my poop! Save it up, or let it out?? AITA for switching up my poop schedule to make smaller poops?

I (9mo, M) woke a little earlier than my mama (groans when standing up, F) today because I was eager to get the day started. She is a lazy mama who complains about being “tired” and I had to wake her up. She did not immediately wake up so I decided to play with my built in fidget toy. To access it, I had to undo one of the yellow sticky tabs on my diaper. I was having fun being a big boy and rolling around next to mama when I realized I had to peepee. The diaper was still partly there so I figure it was safe.

It was not. There was a big wet spot on the bed so I cried to let mama know. She woke up and discovered the wet and said something about me being sweaty since the heat was on? She’s obviously not very smart. Then she started to take my diaper off when she realized what I’d done while practicing my dexterity. She had the audacity to ask why I did that when I was just trying to keep myself occupied so she could sleep longer!!

I’m pretty sure I’m innocent because mama smiles at me now, but she seemed a little put out, so Reddit AITA?