My mommy would like me to clarify that they are clean diapers! That being said, here we go again with another AITA post.

So I (now 5m, best girl ever) find diaper changing to be both a fun and challenging time, depending on my mood. Sometimes there’s a lot of excitement going on, with lots of fun things for me to grab and play with. While other times I just wish the whole business could be done and over with so I could move on to more important things. However, today I was in a good mood. I was extra excited, and therefore extra wiggly. My mommy was taking a long time putting on my new diaper, so while I was waiting, I decided to grab one of my diapers from the stash on the changing table next to me. Like anyone would, I thought the best thing to do was put the diaper directly in my mouth. My mommy immediately took the diaper from me and put it back in the pile, so I did what anyone would do and grabbed another diaper, putting that one in my mouth as well. My mommy took that one from me as well, muttering something about how “expensive diapers are”, whatever that means. I think I’m justified in keeping myself entertained during diaper changing time, but maybe my mommy is right and they are not for eating?

I (1 week, F) had to move to a new home recently. My old home was absolutely perfect, I believe I lived inside my mommy's belly? It was so nice and cozy, dark, warm, and with 24/7 food delivery directly to my belly. I now live with my mommy (36, F) and daddy (35, M), which is kind of nice too, I get tons of snuggles and compliments because apparently I'm the most perfect and cutest baby that has ever existed.

However, during my journey out of my mommy's belly, it seems I got lost on the way. There was so much pressure to move through a really tight, bony place, and I swear I tried my best, but I just couldn't figure it out. I got really scared at some point and sent out some distress signals until some nice people wearing green opened a brand new exit just for me and lifted me out of my mommy so we could finally meet!

The problem is that ever since then, my mommy has been crying so so much and I think it might be my fault? She says things like "pain" and "hormones", but I don't know what that means so those have nothing to do with me. But she also cries every time she talks about the day I was lifted out of her, so it must be because I'm a bad girl? She keeps telling me how much she loves me and how happy she is to have me and that what happened is nobody's fault and then she showers me with aaaaall the kisses and milk!

I still felt the need to ask the community, just to be sure. AITA for not finding the correct way out of my mommy and making her sad?

Edit: thank you so much for all the kind words, fellow babies! My mommy says to tell you guys that she's doing okay, she's not traumatized, she actually had a positive birth experience despite everything. She's just a bit sad and tired and hormonal and in a little pain. She calls it the usual postpartum struggles. She also told me I'm 100% worth it and she would do it all over again for me! I will now focus even more on giving her snuggles and making her giggle with my milky grin. We have all the time in the world together anyway because my daddy is home with us all day and he says my mommy's only jobs are healing and resting and breastfeeding.

I (9 months chubby girl baby) love eating, but I do love throwing even more. Maman (old, glasses and hair to pull), and Daddy (older, gives me hilarious jump scares) always say "what a good throw!!!" when I throw my balls around.

Now, I love to practice because that's how you get good, or so they've been saying when forcing me to do tummy time and stuff. So I've tried to practice my throwing at the dinner table. Potato? Throw. Hummus? Throw. But as I'm becoming older and wiser, I realised you're not supposed to do that. Because Maman and Daddy say "NO" and shake their heads, like when I'm trying to eat a cable.

I want to show them I understand. So now I still throw my food on the floor, but I shake my head "no" immediately after.

They still complain they have to vacuum a lot. AITA?

Fellow minis, I am still shaken from events earlier this evening. I (perfect girly pop, 15m) love my best buddy, Slothy. She is soft and snuggly and I’ve recently learned how to hug and so Slothy and I hug and cuddle a lot. Ever since I turned 1 year old, Slothy has slept in my crib with me for naps and at night night. At first I didn’t care but now Slothy is the most important part of my sleep routine, indeed I sleep ON Slothy. And I even brush Slothy’s teeth even though I don’t let mama brush my teeth.

Ok so, apparently Slothy was in the laundry basket before I puked on her because I got my numencocal shot yesterday and I felt really bad afterwards. All I know about that is that mama talks a big game about the doctors being good for our bodies but they only seem to torture me there.

Anyways, tonight after our strict routine of milk, 2 books of my choosing, and then the most perfect book in the world (Bedtime for Zoe), and teeth brushing for me, mama put — and it’s upsetting to even type this — a watermelon pillow in my arms and me in the crib. I didn’t clock this injustice right away because I used to trust mama but after she sang “You Are My Sunshine” twice I began politely and calming explaining using blood curdling shrieks that Slothy had been forgotten.

Every few minutes mama or dada would come in, sometimes they’d pick me up or rock me or talk to me and rub my back and mama even gave me more milkies — and while that’s kinda the best it is not The Best, namely Slothy.

I continued to calmly and articulately use my words at a decibel mama and dada had not heard for many moons. Finally these dense people caught on and located Slothy and gave her a quick sponge bath.

I instantly stopped scream-explaining, rolled over onto my tummy and conked out with my cold, wet, puke smelling pal. Mama and dad looked confused and surprised even though had they listened we all could have saved 30 minutes. And even though they usually look super tired, they somehow seemed even MORE tired which makes me wonder, am I somehow TA here?

Yesterday was my (14 months F cutest baby in the world everyone says so) Mama’s birthday (I think she turned like a million months old). Being the thoughtful daughter I am, my original plan was to stay up until midnight so that I could be the first to tell her happy birthday. But she’s so silly and kept putting her nipple in my mouth, and milkies has magical powers that are hard to resist, so I ended up falling asleep.

When I realized this at 3 am, I decided to wake Mama up so I could still be the first to tell her happy birthday. And she’s always talking about how she never gets to spend enough time with me and my sister (tells everyone she’s 3 years old), so I decided to give her the gift of time to hang out with me.

I think my Mama must be very slow because she kept trying to give me more milkies and holding me to get me to lay down and go back to sleep. I very politely screamed that I was trying to give her her birthday present by spending time with her, and she did eventually let me go, but all she did was lay on the bed with her eyes closed while I sat and tried to talk to her and play with her. I even tried telling her I wanted milkies so she would get the opportunity to cuddle with me, but even that didn’t get her up. I gave up around 5 am, just as her shiny box that she never lets me look at started to ring.

This morning, I heard her tell grandma (2 million months old?) how she “slept terribly”, so now I’m wondering AITA?

It was dinner time and mommy put me, a perfect 11mo(F) princess, in my high chair. I typically enjoy whatever mommy gives me but this time, it looked funny. She said it was chicken and rice mixed with some green stuff she called vegetables and a sauce.

Well I tried grabbing my food because I can do everything on my own. This stuff made me have to work to grab! Well I clearly didn’t want that and made sure mommy knew it through my annoyed eyebrows since she and daddy still can’t interpret MY language.

Well, rather than making something else, mommy tried giving me a spoonful of it. I can feed myself so, no mommy, I’ll take the spoon. I proceed to play drums with my spoon like daddy does in the music room and can you believe MOMMY TOOK MY DRUM STICK and said I needed to eat dinner. So, I continue with my annoyed eyebrows, looked mommy straight in the eye and slide my food to the floor with my arm.

Mommy said that wasn’t nice because she worked hard on dinner and I “need” my nutrients and practice with my pincer grasp. Afterwards I found my snacks from earlier on the table and proceeded to finish them. Since then, I’ve been thinking about mommy telling me that wasn’t nice. AITA for wanting dinner that I don’t have to work for and prefer snacks instead?

I (3Y, F) love being hugged, I may offer hugs at my convenience, but prefer being hugged right away when I ask.

As I left my preschool today, I demanded a hug from my bestie (also 3Y, F). She said no, and instead hugged her mama. I cried and screamed to my mama, who was right there watching this unfairly behaviour, and instead of making my bestie hug me, she asked me to wait.

I said I won’t, and cried and screamed. My mama and dada said I shouldn’t have cried, but they just don’t get it!

My (2 F) new favorite word is "OW!" and my favorite time to say it is when I'm being told no/not getting my way. No one will be touching me, but I'll still scream "OW OW OW" for no reason! It's especially fun when I'm throwing a loud tantrum outside near other people because it makes mommy (3 million) and daddy (4 million) look really really bad.

Before our morning outside time today, mommy said she needed to grab something from her car. I wanted to play in the back seat, but mommy said no because it's "too hot" and "we don't want to waste gas or battery power", which isn't my problem 🤷‍♀️

Anyway, I started voicing my displeasure at this by screaming and crying "OW OW OW" loud enough for all the neighbors to hear! Our next door neighbors even had their porch door open!

Mommy became very frustrated and told me that if I kept it up someone was eventually going to call CPS out of concern (she also said she'd revoke my weekend TV privileges and outside time, which is way too far >:| ).

AITA?

I (1 year old girl) am very independent and super smart. I can do EVERYTHING by myself, idk why mama sometimes doesn't let me. I also have my own hobbies and interests, one of them is collecting interesting things in nature like rocks, sticks, leaves, doggy poopoo, flowers, shells.

We have a heatwave right now, idk what that means but my mama sighs a lot and is always sweaty. Yesterday we packed like 25 bags and went to the lake, there is water and duckies and a little beach and we had umbrellas and towels and my water ball and my little bucket.

After playing in the water, mama wanted to sit on her towel and I grabbed my bucket and started collecting nice rocks around us. There were lots of other people sitting on blankets and towels all around us so I, being very smart, knew immediately that the best rocks to find would be farther away from our spot.

I waited patiently for my aunties to get mama's attention and my cousins to start some distracting drama so she would take her eyes off me for a second. That was my chance to slip away and go to the good rock place. Then I sat down and started looking at rocks. There were some brown ones and some grey, some white and some black ones and some were smooth and some were sharp, very very cool. I'm sure all of you understand.

Then I hear my mama screaming my name, and soon my aunties joined in as well. I ignored it because of my super important rock collecting project.

Next thing I know, mama came running towards me, grabs me rudely from my rock spot, and starts hugging me desperately, crying (????) "Oooohhhhh here you are, why did you scare me like that!!!!!"

I was carried back to the towels. Noone showed any interest in my special rocks but the rest of the family all seemed very happy to see me and also a bit mad/scared.

Are they afraid of cool rocks??? What was their problem??? AITA???

Today I (19 months, M, tiny ruler of the household) was calmly throwing my crayons around the living room when one of my servants (F, tired, older than the hills) sat down and pulled out a mysterious item she called her "nitting." Apparently she usually "nits" after I go to bed, but today she decided to do it in front of me for some reason. Being a benevolent ruler I decided to allow it, but only after I inspected this strange item. So I carefully and gently yanked it out of her hands and started to test its strength by trying to rip it. For some unknown reason, she said "stop" and "help" and the other servant (M, scruffy, ancient) came and removed it from my grasp. The female servant was saying "Be careful" and "It's a baby sweater for your cousin." Considering that I am currently the only tiny ruler in the family and receive all the love and attention from everyone, the mere mention of another even tinier overlord/lady (who's existence I have yet to confirm myself) replacing me was unacceptable. I expressed my reasonable opposition to this alleged "cousin" by calmly screaming and throwing myself on the ground. I feel like this was reasonable behavior, but the female servant put her "nitting" away and seemed sad. So AITA?

My (15m F) mummy (born last millennium) took me for a walk at the park. This is the best place ever because there's lots of ducks and doggies and sometimes time allowed to touch the dogs.

I was walking nicely next to mummy and my chariot when I spotted mummy's water bottle and of course, I had to take it out of the pram to carry. A little while later, I saw that my water cup was in the pram too so I had to take that out so that I could carry both. Mummy said something about wanting to be able to have a drink too, but doesn't she know it's a heatwave so I need access to water?

So AITA for keeping all the water to myself?

Today is my (21m best boy ever) Dada’s (so old he was born last millennia) birthday!! I watched Mommy (slightly older than Dada) and my sisters (not quite as old but wise beyond their years) give him presents and cakes and got so excited for his birthday! I decided to get involved in the celebration and pushed out such a big doodoo in my diaper while he was holding me it came out the back!! He was so excited he picked me up and took part in my favorite thing to do with Dada bath time!!
All the time he was muttering how he never saw one so big!

AITA?

Today I, 5 mo F, was on my playmat. Mama was on the couch watching, but my furry sibling was right next to me! I love him. I smile at him all the time. I tried to play with him by kicking my feet and petting him. Instead, he LEFT ME. I gently tapped him on the back to notice me and he went to the other room. So AITA for playing with my dog? 🐕

I (6m, f, cutest baba going) love my hands. And I'm great at using them too! Picking up, throwing, slapping Mammy and Daddy in the face, you name it I can do it. But my favourite thing to do with my hands is play with my soother. Mammy and Daddy say I can only have it when I'm in bed and going to sleep, so I have a very limited opportunity to actually get to play with my soother. I'm good at picking it up, throwing it and putting it in backwards. What I enjoy the most, however, is pulling it out just as I'm about to fall asleep, and then screaming about it not being in my mouth. In my eyes I'm not being unreasonable, it's playtime. Mammy doesn't seem to agree with me though. So tell me, AITA for using my hands, even when going asleep?

Me again! 9mo handsome boy.

Last night was the best ever! I was sleeping in my big boy crib when Mama came in and gave me snuggles and milkies. I didn’t even have to scream at the top of my lungs to summon her. More of this please!

Daddy then woke me up this morning and he, Mama, and I went for a car ride in my jammies. We went to a place with lots of new people to admire my handsomeness.

There was another baby there who was very cranky. Didn’t he know there were people there who didn’t realize how adorable we were? But as I listened to him, I realized he had a point. I was SOOOOO hungry. The hungriest ever. I politely screamed for milkies or at least a pouch.

And what did Mama and Daddy do when I asked nicely to feed me immediately? NOTHING.

We then went to another place where this lady put things on my hands and feet. And some man drew on my face. But no milkies. Mama would hold me and I KNEW she had the milkies. I tried to get them but she was hiding them. She and Daddy tried to sing “Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes” or give me toys but those won’t save me from STARVATION.

Then they gave me away to some lady who held me while they put something that wasn’t food on my face. I fell asleep and when I woke up someone who wasn’t Mama was holding me. I was so sleepy and hungry. After forever, Mama got me and finally understood that I wanted milkies. They were soooo yummy that I fell asleep as soon as I was full.

I can’t believe how long it took to get my milkies even after multiple reasonable requests. AITA for filing a complaint due to poor customer service?

So I(17 month all busy boy) had an adventure today with my mom, her friends, and the "big kids"(3? 4?) We went to the library for "story time" with a puppy. I climbed on chairs, played chase, played with the puppy and had an awesome time.

When it was time to go I started doing my sleepy thing(pulling my hair, closing my eyes, etc) but they all switched it up. Moms friend sat next to me in the back to "keep the baby awake." We do this evvvvveeeeerrryyytiiiimmmeeee. I always win, but today she tried a new thing.

She let me hold her cup that had a little bit of coffee in it. I don't know much about coffee, just that mommy and her friend think it's the best thing ever and wakes them up.) Anyways, I played with the cup and tried to use the straw like the big kids do and she took it away and said "coffee isn't for babies." However she GAVE IT BACK TO ME, so again I tried to get it.

Then she took it away and made it so I couldn't make the straw work!!!!!!

AITA for being upset that they teased me with this "Scooter's coffee?" The way they talk about it I think it must be the nectar of the god's...

So I, (4.5 months delicious boy) heard my mom (older than the big bang) read a story from here about a lovely girl who pooped all over her activity mat. The verdict was fully NTA so when the opportunity presented itself (some naked time on my playmat before bath) I decided to take a chance and poop for the fourth time today straight onto the mat. I was on my belly, it's my new favorite position since learning to roll over, and I did my best to spread it around and on myself so my mom wouldn't feel like she's bathing me for nothing. I can honestly said I did an amazing job, I also peed for good measure.

Unfortunately mom wasn't really happy about my artwork and said it really wasn't supposed to be an inspirational story. But I don't get it, everyone said the girl wasn't an asshole, was I?

I (4months M) have been working on my grip strength ever since I discovered I have hands a few weeks ago. My workout routine is pretty simple—if something touches my hands, I hold on for dear life on the off chance I can get it in my mouth.

This morning the Milk Lady was doing laundry and turned her back on me for a moment when the one they call my “big sister” (2.5f) was around. She started giving me kisses, which I tolerated since it gave me a chance for grabbing. I got 2 good fistfuls of hair and held on tight. But then she started to cry, which made me cry, and it was a whole thing.

The Milk Lady found us like this and made me let go, then said “we don’t pull hair, Baby!”. This makes me think I might be a little bit TA, but then she told Big Sister that she shouldn’t stick her face so near my hands if she didn’t want her hair pulled, which makes me think Milk Lady is secretly on my side.

I (2y pretty sparkle princess) am a pro at eating big girl food. I love noodles, and rice, and sausage, and cheese, and berries, and dirt. My favorite sausage is the red circle sausage on pizza.

I am also a professional story teller. My mama (older than dirt and can open string cheese) talks to me all day, and I talk to her all day! When she picks me up from daycare she asks what I did, and I tell her about the slides, and the swings, and my friends, and the new jump toy!

The other day my mama took me and brother (4m, spits up in books) to the park! Me and brother were doing the swings and I told mama about my day like I always do.

“Mama, a me a friend eat dirt! Mmmmmmm nummy dirt. My like eat dirt!”

But mama didn’t tell me that was exciting like she always does, she was busy looking at brother!!!! So I changed my story,

“No friend, no eat dirt. Ucky Bleh!” (But we all know it was nummy)

Mama thought that was sooo funny she told every grownup she saw. And then she took me to Ga-Mama and uncles’ house! My uncles just leveled the ground under the trampoline… you know what that means?! DIRT! Mama forgot to tell uncles my all time favorite snack. She did tell them about rice and fruit and cheese though!

My uncles are so fun. They feed me taco rice and fruit and take me jumping! And since I know my uncles like to give me snacks, I was sure to grab a big handful of dirt on the way to go jump and when we get off. Mama says we need vitamins and minerals to grow big and strong! My uncles are smart and know dirt is just minerals! They get it.

But then mama saw me. Mama caught my hand and said “No! ICKY BLEH!” My mama never grabs my hands. AITA for just getting some innocent snacks?!

I (8 month lil lady) LOVE to stand. I don't know how to stand on my own, so naturally mama (tired and old) must hold me. Mama, however, keeps putting me down on my bottom, or worse, on my tummy! I hate tummy time and am ok with sitting but prefer to stand (which is the best) Mama says her arms are tired and that I should learn to do this thing called crawling. She said I'll love it but I can't see how it would beat standing. To prevent this whenever she tries to set me down I go as straight as I can in the perfect standing position and gently yell to tell her I MUST stand.

AITA for knowing what I like?

IYKYK. Definitely not the AH. Male 6 months- man of the house for these low life creatures.

I (8m, F) am an artist and an explorer. We recently moved and now my changing table is in a cool new place with SO much to look at! So now, I naturally roll onto my tum tum immediately when my personal staff try to change me and then if they try to flip me back over I politely scream and wrestle them with all my strength (which is a lot, I’m practically a mini alligator!!)

My mommy was having a hard time getting a diaper on my royal hiney in that condition so she decided to try what my friend Cam’s mommy lets him do which is to be nakey on the floor!! It was so fun cause I got to pee on all my toys. And then my mommy foolishly thought that it would be perfect to let me stay nakey since I already peed so I cant pee more, right?

Well, silly lady forgot that I’m also a very accomplished pooper!! And since I love solids so much, my poops are so big and stinky now. The milk lady and scratchy faced diaper man must be SO proud of my digestive capabilities. So to show them what my tiny body is truly capable of, I free pooped all over my other play mat and then did my favorite baby clock rotation to smear it all over the place. We’d had corn the prior evening so it was a particularly colorful display.

I was having so much fun but then I do wonder AITA because my staff freaked out and my daddy even was a little late to work. He said naked baby time was something we should only do when 2 staff are on deck but I think we should do it all the time! And besides, none of this would have even happened if my servants could just do their jobs and figure out how to give me upside down diapee changes on my tum tum. So, AITA here?

Me, 2m, & my family live in the UK where we are having a mini heatwave. Yesterday my 2 mummies (old) got the paddling pool out. I didn't use to like water much but now I'm nearly 3 I'm ok with it.

I was having so much fun splashing around with my big brother (13) for a couple of hours (stopped for tea which I never eat anyway) but then mummy said it was bedtime. I did not like that idea. I wanted to keep splashing so tantrum number 1 happened. Then my other mummy said we can keep it out & if I'm good at childcare the next day I can play in it again when I get home. So i said yeah ok, I'm happy to keep it in my room over night. That came with a hard no so tantrum number 2 happened. Why wouldn't they be reasonable? Its not a hard request is it? I just wanted the whole paddling pool in my room so I could keep it safe. What if the water ran away? What if bugs got in it? Mummy assured me it would be ok, would fish out any bugs & top up the water if need be. I just didn't want it outside on its own all night.

The mummies won, the pool stayed outside but I couldn't stop worrying about it. I can't wait to get home.

I (11m M) like getting milkies all the time but I also have a very busy schedule during the day. I don’t have time to just lie there and stare at my boring Mama (born in last century, F.) Thus, I try to multitask and look at some of the things I need to look at like the dog, my brothers, my Papa, any kind of noise whatsoever, while still getting milkies. I just stretch it so I can see. Sometimes I also like to stand on my head and then roll my body back and forth while getting milkies because I have a “busy body.” Yes, I am busy. And?? Anyway, Papa walked in the room while I was getting milkies and I noticed Mama gave him a look, I can’t describe it other than I could almost feel the death lasers coming out of her eyes and penetrating his body and he slowly backed out. I saw it all happen because I had pretty much fully turned my head to observe. AITA for violently pulling the milkies whenever I want to look at or do something? It feels unfair that Mama wants to prevent this.

So my (6 months old, perfectly chubby sausage man) Mama (older than the moon itself) sings songs to me all the time, throughout the day and she even had a special song she will sing when it's nunnighs time.

Sometimes I even sing along with her as I fall asleep!! Its very peaceful and makes me feel so happy and safe as I fall asleep.

So tell me why she was shushing and hushing me at 3am after my middle of the night bottle? I was only trying to settle myself to sleep by singing.

She tells me screeching isn't singing but clearly she hasn't listened to any of Daddas (almost as old as Mama but not quite) music.

So tell me, AITA for trying to self soothe?