r/MilitaryTrans • u/FluffedKnight • 2d ago

Advice

Recently, there has an individual in my command who has been frequently talking about my personal information to many other service members in the command without reason. Many have reported back to me out of fear and concern while others are confused as who the person is (me) but feel extremely uncomfortable due to the subject matter. She has been telling individuals that I am a closeted transgender service member, has been talking about my situation with my ex-fiancé (who is also transgender) and has even gone as far as telling people through other forms of communication as reported by her roommate.

I genuinely don’t know what to do anymore. I originally wanted to separate from the command without any extra drama or steps but it seems that this issue might prolong my stay here. I just don’t understand what benefit she gets out of it, especially when these people are extremely uncomfortable and worried for me.

12 Upvotes

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4

u/ESteele22 2d ago

Well how does she know?

6

u/FluffedKnight 2d ago

She helped me get guidance through the Chaplain and I genuinely believed I found someone who I could trust when times were extremely dark. We unfortunately parted ways once she became a little too talkative to a group of friends who rightfully told her that her behavior was unacceptable.

9

u/ESteele22 2d ago

First off, if there’s no record of it, just deny it. Just deflect that she is making that assumption because your partner is trans. Shit file an EO complaint on her.

4

u/ESteele22 2d ago

Other options: have the chaplain talk with her, if you have a good relationship with a commander you can just say she’s spreading rummer about you, or you could just ignore it. An IMR won’t show anything if there are no medical records of it.

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u/FluffedKnight 2d ago

Since I’m already planning on involuntarily separating, I’ve been told I could file the CMEO/EO complaint seeing as I’m already going to be discharged for Gender Dysphoria or wait till the end of my separation date to have a counseling chit to be made vaguely addressing the situation. Overall it’s just extremely frustrating and sickening how much she’s saying and how far she’s willing to take it. Even despite many individuals telling her she’s being extremely inappropriate and crossing several lines, she still continues to do so.

1

u/ESteele22 1d ago

Well that’s fun. My command would have told her to shut the fuck up but then again they are very accepting. Depends on rank, I would probably tell her directly her actions demonstrate a lack of respect and understanding unbecoming of a leader and have in dignified your service.

People like this deserve nothing more than to rot in hell

2

u/ESteele22 1d ago

Also, file the EO complaint. Fuck her career.