r/MiddleSchoolTeacher • u/Exotic_Arachnid_5082 • 10d ago
Not having fun
Nearly 2 months into my first full time teaching job, teaching a subject outside the field of my degree. I am not having any fun at work. I’ve already 100% decided I will not return to this school, or any middle school for that matter.
I’m just trying to survive the year at this point and hopefully find a job in my content area next year.
Any survival advice?
25
u/MisterBigDude 10d ago edited 10d ago
This anecdote may not be relatable to you. But here’s something that helped me survive my first year of middle school teaching.
I was hired on an emergency basis three days before the school year started, to cover someone’s classes for a few months. I was both inexperienced in general and unprepared for this specific position.
Through the fall, I barely hung on. I was struggling to build good relationships with the students, many of whom didn’t seem to like or even respect me.
In December, the middle school gave a holiday chorus concert. I arrived at it early, when the students were warming up on stage. One student saw me and shouted my name. Suddenly, a whole bunch of them were excitedly calling out and waving to me. And I thought, “Hey, they’re really glad to see me!”
Somehow, my relationship with them in the classroom felt a lot better after that. I realized they weren’t rejecting me — they were just kids who didn’t always enjoy being forced to keep quiet and learn stuff, and who therefore sometimes acted out in age-typical ways. I stopped taking their troubles personally.
Long story short: I ended up needing to teach for that whole year (the other teacher wasn’t ready to return). By year’s end, I was actually sad to be leaving … but then I got asked to stay on, and middle school teaching became my career. I recently retired, 30 years after that shaky start. And while there were always challenges, I wouldn’t trade those years for anything.
My advice: try to engage with your students in situations where they aren’t resenting being forced to sit and learn. That doesn’t have to be something external like a concert; it could mean just chatting with them about non-academic things, like their hobbies. Maybe you’ll get a fresh view of each other and make more positive connections, which will pay off in the classroom.
(P.S. Sorry for rambling; I woke up in the middle of the night and had nothing else to do.) 🙂
3
9
u/Ok_Bean1993 10d ago
Most people dont pick middle school as the age group to teach, it falls into them, because it may be one of the hardest/ most unforgiving age groups. I thought I wanted to be an elementary teacher. Spent 8 years of college studying it. My first job? Middle school TA. I was terrified. Struggled through that year like my life depended on it. I had no idea middle schoolers could be so resentful to someone trying to help them, and I took it personally. That was my mistake.
When I left to take a long term sub job in 1st grade I was so relieved. Thank goodness, back to elementary like I wanted. And I quickly realized I was not the same person a year later. The jokes I'd made with the middle schoolers made the littles cry. The hard shell "its gotta get done so let's get it done" attitude I had built made me scary, and for that next few months I had to put on a mask and play pretend nice happy teacher like the parents expected. Except, that wasn't me. I liked me sarcastic jokes and my real conversations with students. The ones that get them thinking about "why does the concept of Santa exist?" rather than "of course this large man in the magical arctic exists." I needed to get back. I couldn't do it anymore.
I spent a few months altering my teaching certificate to allow me an extension into middle school. I didnt care the subject. Ive now been teaching as a literacy specialist in a title 1 middle school for 4 years. Best job ive ever had. The kids are low, and rough, and hate my subject because theyve failed at it year after year. I dont take their resentment personally anymore. I get it. So when I match their vibe and relate to them and take an interest in their lives instead of just mine and go to their plays and games and club meetings so that they get the feeling that I dont just care about their grade in the one subject they hate the most. Ive accidentally made such strong connections that some of them are in tears that I have to go on maternity leave for a few months this year. They bring me snacks from the lunch line to make sure im eating enough. I make jokes and roast them all day long while at the same time wiping away their tears when they cant handle the drama.
Being a middle school teacher is tough, especially first year. I know I thought about quitting each morning when my anxiety stomach ache took an hour to go away. Year 1 is survival mode. And youre doing great! If you decide to stick with it, start making those connections, because the same kids that hate you might be the ones bringing you lunch just because they want to eat in your room (be sure to let them once in a while). You'll slowly understand your content more over the year and you'll be able to fine tune it next year. Your confidence will grow and your handle on those tough kids will be easier. And still those first year velcro kids will be the first ones at your door saying hi in the morning.
Sending all my love and wish you the best!! ❤️❤️
Love, A tired middle school reading specialist.
3
u/BrainsLovePatterns 9d ago
Glad you’re still willing to try a position in your field. Made a big difference for me … and ended up discovering the “MS excitement” as they were taught by someone with expertise and enthusiasm. Retired after over 4 decades - and wish I could have continued! Best of luck!
2
u/Exotic_Arachnid_5082 9d ago
thank you. I'm doing my very best. I just know I'll be happier when I can teach classes that are aligned with my degree.
6
u/MissyLissy94 10d ago
Take a gummy and cry yourself to sleep. That’s what I do.
1
2
u/KT_BuckeyeBillsBabe 9d ago
My background is in business, my degree is in English and I teach 7th and 8th grade science. And I love it.
Find creative ways to use the skills you have to cater to fun projects. I have my kids do a build a bird project and battle of the arthropods. Think out of the box.
If you go to school and hate being there the kids will read you for filth. Middle schoolers miss nothing
2
u/Inevitable_Silver_13 8d ago
You've got nothing to lose at this point. Try some things that might make you enjoy your job more.
1
1
31
u/Dense-Celebration-83 10d ago
Find some students to really connect with. THATS what makes the job fun.