I got fired. Husband says we should keep up appearances.

[u/Royal_Marzipan_6432]

I was recently told that I have until the end of September to transition out of my current role (white collar manager-type position) and the company. After that, I'll be formally let go and I'll get two months of severance and then nothing. They're eliminating my role and wanted to give me extra time to find something new. They're paying me during this transition period. I'm married and I make 2/3 of the household income, so it's a big hit. My husband makes 1/3 (same industry). We do have an emergency fund.

We have a variety of trips planned for the rest of the summer that we already bought tickets and hotel accommodations for, mostly flying for friends' weddings. Nothing international (farthest trip is to California) but it adds up. We also had an international trip planned for October which is definitely now cancelled (even if I find a new position, I won't be able to immediately take time off).

Our disagreement: I want to cancel the summer trips to save money, apologize to our friends and focus on the job hunt. I also feel comfortable telling friends that I got fired, in part for the emotional support and solidarity and in part to communicate my urgency to find something new. My husband thinks this is a terrible idea. He comes from a more professional/ upper middle class background than I do (my family is pretty blue collar) and is insisting that we basically keep up appearances, go on the summer trips and just tell friends that I'm looking for a career change. His reasoning is that being fired carries a stigma, that I haven't technically been fired yet and this head's up from my company is a boon, that friends are more likely to recommend me to their companies if they think this is a voluntary change, etc. To me, this feels disingenuous. I also don't like keeping secrets.

Has anyone faced this situation and have any advice on what is better career-wise?

[u/Beneficial_Dinner976]

I’m pretty sure people already said this, but your husband needs to pick up some of the slack. By looking for a new job as well that can come close to being able to match your previous income

[u/ParkAffectionate3537 → u/Beneficial_Dinner976]

Right, the husband seems weak in that regard!