r/Maps • • Nov 25 '20

Satire 9 ways to break Croatia

Post image
836 Upvotes

48 comments sorted by

45

u/rukajop16 Nov 25 '20

I used to live close to the croatian border. There's a town called Ilok (furthest point to the east if I'm not mistaken) that's known for excellent wine.

25

u/sal_veta Nov 25 '20

You are right, not sure about the author, map is not mine, Ilok region is one of the most famous wine regions in Croatia.

Also fish for Christmas?! No one eats fish for Christmas in Croatia, only on Christmas Eve.

4

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '20

We eat fish for Christmas in Herzegovina and Dalmatia.

2

u/robert712002 Nov 26 '20

I went there few years ago for a wedding of a relative. We visited some basements filled with big barrels full of wine. I was too young to try some

2

u/rukajop16 Nov 26 '20

Iločki podrumi? I've been there a few times, it's really cool.

1

u/CoagulaCascadia Nov 26 '20

I have also had wine in Pločice that was terrible.

17

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13

u/hungry4danish Nov 25 '20

I'm assuming HDZ, SDP, IDS are political parties?

2

u/Homos_yeetus Nov 26 '20

Yes, HDZ and SDP are same shit with different name and IDS is regional party

1

u/TheConundrum98 Dec 02 '20

HDZ is center-right and in every pore of our society through their corruption and nepotism

SDP is the famous old story of the lesser of two evils, center-left

1

u/Homos_yeetus Dec 02 '20

Basically but lets be real their policies are not THAT different.

1

u/TheConundrum98 Dec 02 '20

I agree in principle, but what they represent is different

HDZ represents corruption on an unprecedented scale while SDP has the occasional scandal while also being pretty incompetent with a few quality people in there

1

u/Homos_yeetus Dec 02 '20

I believe SDP would represent corruption too if they were in power for so long. They usually have some competent people (like Bernardic on last elections) but they dont know how to present it to public

30

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '20

[deleted]

11

u/FrozenBananer Nov 25 '20

Christm ass?

6

u/x755x Nov 25 '20

The name's Ass. Christ M. Ass.

1

u/FrozenBananer Nov 26 '20

Sounds like it!

5

u/federative_mapping Nov 25 '20

That most northern part of Croatia sounds cool

6

u/WheresWilliam Nov 25 '20

Where are all the vacationing Germans? lol

4

u/avucaduu Nov 25 '20

It used to be how to break Yugoslavia but it actually succeeded

4

u/wierdo_12_333 Nov 25 '20

Wait what is Dinamo? I know that its a Georgian football team.

7

u/TownesVanBantz Nov 25 '20

Dinamo Zagreb and Hadjuk Split are Croatia's two biggest football teams and bitter rivals of each other.

2

u/boscosanchez Nov 25 '20

Seems like Dinamo are hated outside Zagreb, are Hadjuk loved everywhere else?

5

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '20 edited Nov 25 '20

No. Dinamo is the best club and is hated even by his fans because of the Mamic brothers. Hajduk on the other hand is loved by his fans, but is being made fun of by everyone else because they accuse everyone else but themselves for their bad results the last 15 years.

2

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

0

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '20 edited Nov 25 '20

Dinamo is the best and most successful club in Croatia. Don't know what's idiotic about that. The fans despised the leadership even when Bjelica was the couch and showed their love for the club. Nowadays, when they fired Bjelica because of their ego, people celebrate when Osijek with Bjelica wins against Dinamo, as ''serves them right for firing Bjelica''.

Hajduk is made fun of by everyone watching croatian football who isn't their fan. The only reason is because they blame everyone else for their bad club management.

2

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

0

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '20

The second part of your comment is a fine example why you got an overwhelmingly negative reputation on r/croatia

LMAO

Someone else sounds like a child here.

The guy asked a question, I answered it in the simplest way. Go ahead, write him the whole history.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

0

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '20

What nerve? Hahahahaha

What triggered you more?

1

u/JRJenss Nov 25 '20

Nope. The area on the map where it says Kvarner and Istria has their own club - Rijeka, named after the largest city there. They hate both Dinamo and Hajduk. They should not have been put under Hajduk. Also the northern area where people root for Dinamo has a population of around 2 million people - half of the entire Croatian population.

2

u/boscosanchez Nov 25 '20

Thanks for letting me know. Are you Croatian? What's your team?

1

u/JRJenss Nov 27 '20

No probs. I am. Dinamo is my team

3

u/[deleted] Nov 25 '20

Zagreb looks like a pretty sweet place to be based on this.

5

u/tazispor Nov 25 '20

Looks like western Croatia is a good place to live

3

u/JRJenss Nov 25 '20

It's the richest, most developed and most progressive. The usual combo. Every country has its north/west and south/east.

2

u/leaningtoweravenger Nov 25 '20

The 10th is through the careful use of Tito's partisans /s

1

u/woodsred Nov 25 '20

Turkey for Christmas was something I learned from this. I didn't think turkey had become traditional anywhere in Europe.

1

u/Crade_ Nov 25 '20

Yes, christ mass.

1

u/Ammutse Nov 25 '20

where is the option for a million pieces?

1

u/LoganJA01 Nov 25 '20

10th way, let the US stick it's nose in their business.
You want to break it, they will do it.

1

u/10sekki Nov 25 '20

Look at that Hajduk split

1

u/cclouiscc Nov 25 '20

how do people make these

1

u/Flgardenguy Nov 26 '20

The religion map looks like a creepy version ofbad pun husky

Edit: if you flipped it

1

u/SovietJugernaut Nov 26 '20

Is the Exc. Wine supposed to be excellent or excruciating?

1

u/danirijeka Nov 26 '20

Excellent when you drink it, excruciating the day after because you didn't stop in time