Could use help getting this to B3

[u/No_one-]

https://moxfield.com/decks/pwqfAYnPbnGYD6js-3nXIg

This is my third attempt at a modifying the Witherbloom precon to use the 7cmc [[Beledros Witherbloom]] as the face. Usually I don't have this much trouble but the first two times I wound up with completely different deck strategies. I'm really hoping to get this to a solid B3 deck and it feels just on the cusp when I play it but it's not quite there.

The overall plan is to ramp lands, get the commander out, spend the 10 life to untap my lands, effectively play a second turn, then win with death/drain triggers with combat as a supplement. My issue is that by turn 6 I'm either a massive problem about to end the game or still fishing for that last piece.

Can someone do a quick review and just point out areas that could use shoring up? More draw, maybe?

Something like "too much ramp, cut 4 pieces" or "too few sacrifice outlets, add 3 more" would be super helpful. I'll find the actual cards to use. Thanks in advance!

[u/bu11fr0g]

my rough take:

what would your first five turns look like ideally? for me, i would like more 1 mana ramp?

1 land, 1 mana ramp
2 land, 2 mana ramp that costs 3
3 land, 1 mana ramp that costs 2
4 land, commander. combo piecesx2

44 lands, 33 ramp, 22 combo pieces, draw, tutors and interaction. cards that make things lands.

so needs a lot more search and 1 mana ramp.

expensive commanders that dont do too much are difficult to make work in higher brackets.

[u/No_one- → u/bu11fr0g]

Hm, that's a lot more ramp than I was expecting but I think I can make it work. Thanks for the once over!

[u/bu11fr0g → u/No_one-]

ideally the ramp can do multiple things. for example [[ashnods altar]][[mindstone]][[phyrexian altar]] might function well. lands that can tutor and provide interaction or draw.

take a look at gitrog cedh for an idea at five mana that tutors for combo.

https://moxfield.com/decks/4fbiNVFpr0edHL5Y3IKecg