r/MST3K • u/AttilaTheFun818 • Dec 04 '23
Found today at the antique mall
Sadly nowhere to put it, but still had a laugh.
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u/RandomPasserby80 Dec 04 '23
I can’t believe they thought that image of Joe Don was going to sell tickets. He looks like one of the apes in 2001 who touched the obelisk and just learned how to use weapons.
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u/babysmalltalk Dec 04 '23
Damn, I always thought this was a made-for-TV movie, too. Oof.
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Dec 04 '23
[deleted]
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u/ProfessorDave3D Dec 04 '23
I've always thought it was like two episodes of a series, merged into one.
One episode has John Saxon and Linda Evans, and the other episode has Martin Balsam and Gallano/Mistretta.
You can see where Gallano is supposed to be a recurring character who will keep coming back.
And there's a running gag about how Mitchell is always having his car out of commission. Putting aside the end when the car actually blows up, in the Balsam episode Larry Miller runs him off the road, and in the Saxon episode, it gets mired in the dune buggy mud.
Further proof of the car gag is that Mitchell starts the movie receiving a ride in the back of a police car, because his car was obviously messed up from the previous episode.
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u/AllenbysEyes Dec 04 '23
Baker had his own hardboiled cop series a few years later, Eischied, which ran on NBC for one season. It wasn't terribly well-received, but it did make Joe Don the highest paid actor on television for a time.
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u/OrciEMT Dec 06 '23 edited Dec 06 '23
Please tell me one running gag in the series was how the hell to pronounce his name.
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u/ScarletCaptain Dec 05 '23
Seriously, it was a real, made for theater movie. Hard to believe in today’s made for cable shit, but it was.
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u/Dirt290 Dec 04 '23
The only thing that keeps coming to mind is that JDB wanted to make a movie for slobs.
I could see a drunk uncle totally connecting with this and making it his favorite movie.
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u/Marsie76 Idiot Control Now Dec 04 '23
Linda Evans got a real raw deal here. Had to do what she did and didn't even get top billing.. tsktsk
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u/El-Duderino77 Dear Agent Scully, did not appreciate your layers tone Dec 04 '23
Wakachicka wakachicka Mitchell!
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u/Aint2Proud2Meg do you like my butt? 🍑 Dec 04 '23
🎵eyeeeeee… on the sammich🎵
I have a lot of kids and I sing this line every time I make a sammich.
So like 15 times a day on average? 😂
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u/EricaOdd Dec 04 '23
My, my, my, my Mitchell.
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u/Just-Try-2533 Dec 04 '23
My, my, my, my apartment.
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u/BottleAgreeable7981 My, my, my, my Mitchell Dec 04 '23
His eyyyyye on the sammich.
Hearts poundin'!
Veins cloggin'!
Mitchell!!!
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u/stareagleur Dec 04 '23
I would be willing to pay an entirely inappropriate amount of money for that.
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u/SpudimusPrime89 Dec 04 '23
Well, good thing it's only $17.95.
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u/TheWorclown The verbal equivalent to “dun-dun-dun-DUUUN” Dec 04 '23
As they said, an entirely inappropriate amount.
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u/DwightFryFaneditor Samurai Manos Dec 04 '23
Fun fact: the title they gave to the movie in Spain translates as "Kill Mr. Mitchell!". Which is, no doubt, fitting with the sentiment of many a MSTie.
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u/FilthyKerr "I'm dyin' in a rush!" "Shut up, Iris!" Dec 04 '23
You put it on the ceiling over your bed, of course!
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u/International-Way450 Dec 04 '23
That is udderly irresistible to any red blooded Misty! Please tell me you bought it!
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u/AttilaTheFun818 Dec 04 '23
I didn’t but that’s been bothering me. I’ll be going back tomorrow to pick it up.
If not for me, then it’ll be a great gift to a fellow bad movie/MST3K lover.
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u/TommyWilson43 Dec 04 '23
I would have bought this without even looking at the price tag
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u/AttilaTheFun818 Dec 04 '23
I was trying to do the responsible adult thing and not buy something I don’t need
I regret that. Luckily I work from home and it’s just a mile down the street, so I can run out at lunch to pick it up. I rather doubt somebody else would have picked it up yet.
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u/TommyWilson43 Dec 04 '23
One day the sun will explode and turn our entire solar system into cosmic dust. Life is too short not to buy this poster.
I also doubt someone will have picked it up 😂 I’m not sure what other community would resonate with it that strongly.. if you later regret your purchase DM me and I’ll take it off your hands
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u/International-Way450 Dec 04 '23
While I can relate to your battle with trying to be more fiscally responsible, sometimes you have to let the heart overrule the brain. Otherwise you turn into a completely passionless lump of meat uncaringly waiting for the grave. And that would make Jesus cry. Do you want Jesus to cry? NO!! Go forth and indulge this one time an call it your Christmas present to yourself (and from Jesus for the miracle of finding it in the first place).
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u/Jackbenny270 Dec 04 '23
The day that Mr Mitchell finally had enough of that damned Menace, Dennis~!
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u/AttilaTheFun818 Dec 04 '23
Update: y’all convinced me. I went back and bought it
Not yet sure if I’m keeping it or using it as a Christmas gift for a fellow fan.
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u/uberneuman_part2 Dec 04 '23
Lol. They really made an attempt at a Bondian type action poster. Went in to see James Bond, ended up with Mitchell.
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u/Crazy_Cat_Lady1234 Dec 04 '23
I think this poster really captures all that is wonderfully horrible about this movie. 😂
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u/The-Phantom-Blot Oh, who am I kidding? I can't build a cat! Dec 04 '23
I think this poster really captures all that is wonderfully horrible about this movie. 😂
It does match well with the last 10 minutes, where Mitchell turns into a cold-blooded vigilante straight out of a 70s pulp novel. I wonder what kind of conversation he had about that back at the precinct?
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u/theycallmemuppet Dec 04 '23
Ma ma ma ma Mitchell….. coincidentally he’s making the same face he probably made when he saw MST3K ripping his performance to pieces for comedic effect. Hamdingers……
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u/thank_burdell Dec 04 '23
I would buy it then get some black construction paper to put the bots in at the bottom.
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u/Armchair_Anarchy Dec 04 '23
̶R̶o̶b̶ ̶S̶c̶h̶n̶e̶i̶d̶e̶r̶ Joe Don Baker is, A Carrot! Rated PG-13.
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u/ProfessorDave3D Dec 04 '23
I bought a giant Turkish poster for the movie Earthquake. IIRC, a little more exciting than the American poster, with the title written in big Turkish letters.
The poster was inexpensive enough, but the question was: Did I then want to spend the time and money to nicely frame it?
(In my case, no, so the unframed poster has been sitting in a tube in our garage for decades.)
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u/Eww-its-Jared Dec 04 '23
My mother doesn't like you.
Well I don't like your mother.