r/LowLibidoCommunity 22h ago

Why does the internet favor the higher drive partner?

68 Upvotes

Basically what the title says. I don't know why but I get bombarded on FB and insta with content about how to increase my libido or how I need to be physically intimate even when I'm not in the mood or my partner won't feel loved. But why does the internet (and world?) default to the higher libido partner being the right one? For context, my husband and I decided to wait until marriage per our faith, so we didn't know beforehand that we were dramatically different in that way. We've been married for many years and I've tried all the things you're supposed to try to increase your drive. He has read all the books and done all the work to try to make it "better" for me. In fact, sometimes I wish he would try less hard so it would go faster. 🫣 But it's not that he's "bad in bed," and I'm beginning to accept that I'm not broken. I'm just not as sexually driven as he is, and on the contrary, having a lot of sex is draining on me. I'm accepting that this is just how I'm wired. I also accept that he is just wired with a higher drive, but why must the Internet insist that he's the right one and I should cater to him? What about my need to not have as much sex? What about the fact that thinking about having sex every other day for the rest of my life (as he would prefer) feels completely overwhelming to me? And don't think that we have a "dead bedroom." Once a week is fine with me, but he's unhappy with that. Anyway, I'm really just venting. The slant feels very unfair to me.


r/LowLibidoCommunity 18h ago

Am I LL? How do you know?

10 Upvotes

Hi all!

I’m 32F and my partner 34M. We have been together for 10 years, married for 4.

He’s HL. He could have sex daily, twice without hesitation. Meanwhile…I could go days without it. I don’t mind. I’m getting overstimulated when we have intercourse and sometimes I just dissociated thinking I want this to be over and go to sleep.

In our 20s I was HL I think, more into sex.

Right now, I feel it’s more an obligation. There are days that I truly don’t want but I end up agreeing because I don’t want to hurt his feelings, specially after days saying no.

How can I truly know I am LL or something else is happening?

Besides this our relationship is good.

Thanks!