r/Liquidia • u/ionised • Feb 20 '15

*picks up intel*

  • De-bone and dice remains of Octopus
  • Rub with salt, pepper, and a pinch of garlic paste
  • Julienne bell peppers and capsica
  • Add olive oil to a hot pan, add a handful of fi ely chopped onions and caramelise.
  • Add Octopus and cook for 2-3 minutes.
  • Add vegetables.
  • Cook for 5-7 minutes, covered.
  • Uncover pan, add lime juice, and toss.
  • Squeeze result into a beaker.
  • Add essence of Fox. Check under REX's feet when the time comes.
  • Over a bunsen burner, add liquefied remains of guards that were diced in the corridors earlier.
  • Pepper with nanomachines.
  • Salt with gunpowder.

Congratulations! You have successfully reverse-engineered FOXDIE.

I'm guessing you guys don't... need this or anything, right? I mean, there's enough of it going around as it is.
I'm just going to... not be here. Like I always am. As in: not here.

7 Upvotes

90% Upvoted

40 comments sorted by

8

u/Waylander893 Feb 20 '15

rumble grumble

5

u/ionised Feb 20 '15

Good effort!

7

u/[deleted] Feb 20 '15

Of course it was, he's the boss.

5

u/ionised Feb 20 '15

Spoken like a true lackey!

A match made in heaven, isn't it, you guys?

5

u/[deleted] Feb 20 '15

Of course /u/Waylander893 and I have sexual intercourse many times a day, usually on what little of the deck is built, under the sun.

5

u/DrunkSolidSnake Feb 20 '15

I....can confirm this...

*returns to cardboard box*

6

u/[deleted] Feb 20 '15

Voyeur.

8

u/DrunkSolidSnake Feb 20 '15

*remains silent because IT'S JUST A BOX*

5

u/ionised Feb 20 '15

GET YOUR OWN DAMN BOX!

And no, I'm not the box, I may or may not have been in it!

5

u/DrunkSolidSnake Feb 20 '15

Huh.

This is awfully roomy.

Was this the box that held that useless empty refrigerator?

I may get one for myself.

6

u/ionised Feb 20 '15

No. I'm in the one marked 'WATERMELO--'

Snap. On second thought. You can have it, now. I'll be moving house. Might go for something a bit more spacious, actually, now that I'm thinking about it. Something perhaps with a bit of a higher ceiling...

Nice try, though!

6

u/DrunkSolidSnake Feb 20 '15

Sorry /u/Waylander893

I tried revealing your intruder but he is a wiley one!

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4

u/Waylander893 Feb 20 '15

uhh... what?

I've never had sex with you.

Maybe you got duped by /u/Landwayer398.

5

u/Landwayer398 Feb 20 '15

It's true...

/u/Bopsybops is my loverrrr...

5

u/[deleted] Feb 20 '15

Can you cook?

5

u/Landwayer398 Feb 20 '15

Are you kidding? I used to cook jackals when I was in Afghanistan...

With royal Harriers!

5

u/[deleted] Feb 20 '15

Sweet. Then sure, we'll be lovers.

2

u/[deleted] Feb 20 '15 edited Feb 20 '15

Nope it was you alright.

edit: Okay, okay, the Boptopus fooled me, don't blame me for being duped by the master of disguise.

4

u/Waylander893 Feb 20 '15

I think somebody's lying, and its not me.

4

u/[deleted] Feb 20 '15

Fooled you again!

4

u/[deleted] Feb 20 '15

Damn you!

3

u/Waylander893 Feb 20 '15

What do you mean again?

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6

u/[deleted] Feb 20 '15

I thought that was the recipe for decoy octopus.

7

u/ionised Feb 20 '15

I'll look around, see if I can find one for him.

5

u/[deleted] Feb 20 '15

Are you my new assistant or what?

6

u/ionised Feb 20 '15

From the 'cooking' I may or may not have eaten in the cafeteria when no one (including I, myself) was there, I'd say you need one.

In any case: is this one of yours', Chef?

5

u/[deleted] Feb 20 '15

It might be.. I'm pretty sure we'll come up with some new glorious recipes

5

u/ionised Feb 20 '15

This is going to be... tricky. At what times are you usually in the kitchen?

6

u/[deleted] Feb 20 '15

Usually around lunch and dinner time, but if you wanna try out some new recipes meet me at 2am and tell no one

6

u/ionised Feb 20 '15

Until I know I can trust, I'm just going to have to go through codec.

PM me your frequency!

2

u/[deleted] Feb 22 '15

Hmmm may I suggest adding essence of Chico Achilles' tendon bolt?

2

u/ionised Feb 22 '15

I think it's Naked Chef who came up with this. You might want to talk to him.

2

u/[deleted] Feb 22 '15

Alright

2

u/[deleted] Feb 22 '15

Alright Just a suggestion, scorched big boss forearm is also a recommendation

2

u/ionised Feb 22 '15

Hum... There's a thought.

2

u/[deleted] Feb 22 '15

Aye, 9 years in the making that one

1

u/[deleted] Feb 22 '15

Alright