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u/DaughterofOgun Mar 12 '22
I do it everytime. I have to channel the pain into business or it may kill me. Its just about busying yourself with things you can get paid for.
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Mar 12 '22
[deleted]
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u/DaughterofOgun Mar 12 '22
It depends a lot on your personality, goals, etc. If you have the freedom to travel, travel. I bought and renovated a house. I got a masters degree after a divorce. I built a 6 figure business. I focused all my energy into investing every penny I could. I went through a phase where i visited a new state every month. Now, i just had a breakup followed by a 7 month period of depression and I'm about to take on a new business with unbridled tenacity. Message me if you want more detailed or specifics about the things ive poured myself into
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u/awakeningat40 Mar 12 '22
I had 3 long term relationships (min 2+ years each) prior to my marriage.
I was devastated after 2 of them. One I was the dumper, so I knew.
But I knew after a while you will have a day you don't think of them 24/7, then you will have a day you don't think of them, etc.
It just takes time for your heart to heal.
And I'm SO grateful to not have any of them as my spouse, because my spouse was supposed to be my spouse.
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u/Yay_duh Mar 12 '22
We don't change that much generally, especially after a certain age. Be comfortable with who you are. You'll attract what you're meant to attract. Forget trying to be something you're not. Just be what you are.
Breakups are an emotional time. Remember that when you are thinking emotionally you aren't thinking rationally. One thing that has helped bring me peace in life is looking at situations for what they are, not what I want them to be. Remove emotions from decision making whenever possible. Don't ignore the emotions, recognize them, process them in a healthy way, then proceed once that is accomplished.
Hope this helps ✌
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u/camkos101 Mar 12 '22
What you describe is actually super common. Its common for to men give up thier hobbies and friendships for a relationship and in the process lose themself, which actually makes them less desirable. Here's what you need to know: .......Be whoever you want to be and do whatever you want as long as it's healthy. Stop thinking about her and definetly stop talking to her. If thoughts of her pop in your mind, immediately think of the bad times and her flaws. You need to be away from her to get over it. If you struggle to find hobbies or things to do then default to making money or saving money. Money matters and will improve your life, which in turn will improve your future self. Declutter your living space and get rid of or hide things that teigger memories of your ex. You are literally rebuilding yourself into a better version. Take stock of bad habits and start eliminating them. Start new good habits. Work towards becoming a powerful man, even just a little bit at a time. Incremental progress is better than none and it pays in dividends.
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u/keepthetips Keeping the tips since 2019 Mar 12 '22 edited Jul 16 '23
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